What happens when you are shot by a trusted fellow prepper and you survive.

[MarlaSinger]

An update! : After telling me for 6 months that my lawyer wouldn't have issued the charges if he couldnt prove it, the spineless jerk gaslighted me and tried to insinuate that A. I had been lying and B. I wasnt on his side?! (Wtf!) This odd and hostile conversation should have alerted me. I know I wasn't A. And Im definitely am on my own side of this situation. He suggested that i give my offender a deal of 15 years and I said no deal, we are going to trial. 4 days later he called me while I was traveling for family, and told me that my offender took the deal and they'd be signing it all on the following Tuesday. I had the option of being present and writing an victims impact statement. This case had become my offender vs Washington state so I literally had no choices They gave him 15 years. 6 months time served. They sent me a letter stating w good behavior he will be released early 2036!! (Not 15 yrs!) Turns out the lawyer also lessened the charges from first degree, w assault 4 and a gun charge, too 2 degree attempted murder and domestic violence. This allows him to get out early on good behavior. Because he is a first time offender and a good Christian
If you need a public defender in Cowlitz county, I suggest you do everything you can to hire someone on your own. These public defender's are 2 faced.
After spending some serious hours on the phone w victims advocates I have heard from many people that Washington seems to be a state that supports the offender more than the victims of the crimes. With all that being said, after 2 weeks of transfers and lots of DOC notifications, my offender is finally in his new residence for the next 12 years. 200 miles away and hopefully remorseful at this point. I have done lots of healing and soul searching over these last few months. Most of me is almost completely healed except for debilitating migraines, cant tilt my head all the way back and small cases of vertigo laying down. A lil bit of short term memory issues as well, but definitely getting better!!! I have come to realize that I am a miracle. I have conquered most of my ptsd. Certain things are still triggers, but I have identified them and I am managing. Now all I have left to do is getting back into the gun range.
I want to thank everyone for being apart of my healing and recovery! Your conversation, questions, suggestions and ideas really helped me over this whole ordeal. Even though my offender didn't get the sentence I hoped for, I really do forgive him and hope hes learned as many lessons as I have. I get to go back to work in September if my memory stays on track! In the mean time I have signed up too volunteer with the NRA and Im open too meeting new friends and range buddies. Now that its all over, if anyone didnt get your questions answered, please feel free to ask again!

 

[titsonritz]

I have come to realize that I am a miracle.

You were a miracle before you were a miracle. Keep hanging in there.

 

[OldBroad44]

Hello Marla @MarlaSinger. It's great to hear from you. Sounds like you are recovering really well considering what you went through.

A couple of suggestions. Dont assume that expressions of remorse are genuine, or that even if genuine now mean that they will last for 12 years. In this situation I would assume he's going to come after me for revenge while both hoping and believing it isnt likely. At least two years before he's due to get out I would move to a house rented in someone else's name and drive a car registered in someone else's name. And use a false name on utility bills but with my real name as the billing address. And I would avoid social media, especially any with my photo. If I believed he was likely to come after me I would take more extreme measures such as legally changing my name and moving to another state and different job. So I would consider the less extreme measures I suggest part of optimistically assuming all is well but taking precautions. Just like having a smoke alarm even though the odds of my home catching on fire are very low.

Second. Don't correspond, phone or communicate with the guy in any way. If you do you continue the relationship for both of you, and he will be in more danger of at least wanting to meet when he gets out if jail. And that would not be a good move.

Hang in there, Marla, and continue to heal and make progress.
Carol

 

[Certaindeaf]

Hello Marla @MarlaSinger. It's great to hear from you. Sounds like you are recovering really well considering what you went through.

A couple of suggestions. Dont assume that expressions of remorse are genuine, or that even if genuine now mean that they will last for 12 years. In this situation I would assume he's going to come after me for revenge while both hoping and believing it isnt likely. At least two years before he's due to get out I would move to a house rented in someone else's name and drive a car registered in someone else's name. And use a false name on utility bills but with my real name as the billing address. And I would avoid social media, especially any with my photo. If I believed he was likely to come after me I would take more extreme measures such as legally changing my name and moving to another state and different job. So I would consider the less extreme measures I suggest part of optimistically assuming all is well but taking precautions. Just like having a smoke alarm even though the odds of my home catching on fire are very low.

Second. Don't correspond, phone or communicate with the guy in any way. If you do you continue the relationship for both of you, and he will be in more danger of at least wanting to meet when he gets out if jail. And that would not be a good move.

Hang in there, Marla, and continue to heal and make progress.
Carol

It's tricky to dissappear.. I had to for 20 years because of a crazy gal. It was compounded because she was a sleuthing savant even back then. And crazy. Lol

 

[Xaevian]

It's tricky to dissappear.. I had to for 20 years because of a crazy gal. It was compounded because she was a sleuthing savant even back then. And crazy. Lol

Here comes the crazy/hot matrix memes...

 

[Kruel J]

 

[bradsteen]

Well, 15 years in jail is still a long time. Not saying it's adequate punishment for the bad guy, but compared to some of the wrist-slap sentences I hear about, it's better than it could have been. Also, a lot can happen to a person in jail that long.

As the victim you should be able to request early warning of his parole. You have at least 10 years to put together a plan to go off his radar. Be prepared to implement it when that early warning comes.

 

[Kruel J]

Hopefully she'll get lucky and someone will dust this POS off inside.

 

[SavageGerbil]

An update! : After telling me for 6 months that my lawyer wouldn't have issued the charges if he couldnt prove it, the spineless jerk gaslighted me and tried to insinuate that A. I had been lying and B. I wasnt on his side?! (Wtf!) This odd and hostile conversation should have alerted me. I know I wasn't A. And Im definitely am on my own side of this situation. He suggested that i give my offender a deal of 15 years and I said no deal, we are going to trial. 4 days later he called me while I was traveling for family, and told me that my offender took the deal and they'd be signing it all on the following Tuesday. I had the option of being present and writing an victims impact statement. This case had become my offender vs Washington state so I literally had no choices They gave him 15 years. 6 months time served. They sent me a letter stating w good behavior he will be released early 2036!! (Not 15 yrs!) Turns out the lawyer also lessened the charges from first degree, w assault 4 and a gun charge, too 2 degree attempted murder and domestic violence. This allows him to get out early on good behavior. Because he is a first time offender and a good Christian
If you need a public defender in Cowlitz county, I suggest you do everything you can to hire someone on your own. These public defender's are 2 faced.
After spending some serious hours on the phone w victims advocates I have heard from many people that Washington seems to be a state that supports the offender more than the victims of the crimes. With all that being said, after 2 weeks of transfers and lots of DOC notifications, my offender is finally in his new residence for the next 12 years. 200 miles away and hopefully remorseful at this point. I have done lots of healing and soul searching over these last few months. Most of me is almost completely healed except for debilitating migraines, cant tilt my head all the way back and small cases of vertigo laying down. A lil bit of short term memory issues as well, but definitely getting better!!! I have come to realize that I am a miracle. I have conquered most of my ptsd. Certain things are still triggers, but I have identified them and I am managing. Now all I have left to do is getting back into the gun range.
I want to thank everyone for being apart of my healing and recovery! Your conversation, questions, suggestions and ideas really helped me over this whole ordeal. Even though my offender didn't get the sentence I hoped for, I really do forgive him and hope hes learned as many lessons as I have. I get to go back to work in September if my memory stays on track! In the mean time I have signed up too volunteer with the NRA and Im open too meeting new friends and range buddies. Now that its all over, if anyone didnt get your questions answered, please feel free to ask again!

When the anxieties hit, remind yourself that running into this twice is like getting struck by lightning a second time. It's better, though, with lightning you can't blast the cloud if it comes around looking to try it again.

 

[Lilhigbee]

If he tries to contact you make sure and keep a record of it. If he gets a parole hearing that info can be used to keep him inside.

 

[Kruel J]

I'm an eye-for-an-eye kind of dude. I don't want to suggest anything nefarious here but why tf should the OP plan on hiding? Maybe prepper pussinboots should be the one planning where to hide. I don't think OP should have to assume to be the victim for life here. Gotta stand up to bullies. Easier said than done I know .....just piszes me off........

 

[Diamondback]

And your dog, anytime my dog doesn't like someone I know they're a scumbag.

Ouch. Dogs go from Lassie to Cujo just at scent of me, though it may be because of the fear reflex thanks to a Norwegian elkhound trying to rip my face off as a 3yo.

Marla, thanks for the update, stay strong and hang in there--frequently we think we're over a thing then some random little thing brings it all back; when I was a psych student I was taught "recovery is a journey not a destination, the challenge is to make something good come out of it, wring some light out of the darkness."

@Kruel J ESPECIALLY easier said than done when you have to live under a regime that leghumps and knobgobbles bullies and tries to proclaim them "victims" and the real vics in need of punishment for some imaginary misdeed their ancestors may or may not have ever even THOUGHT of committing.

 

[Ura-Ki]

Ouch. Dogs go from Lassie to Cujo just at scent of me, though it may be because of the fear reflex thanks to a Norwegian elkhound trying to rip my face off as a 3yo.

Marla, thanks for the update, stay strong and hang in there--frequently we think we're over a thing then some random little thing brings it all back; when I was a psych student I was taught "recovery is a journey not a destination, the challenge is to make something good come out of it, wring some light out of the darkness."

@Kruel J ESPECIALLY easier said than done when you have to live under a regime that leghumps and knobgobbles bullies and tries to proclaim them "victims" and the real vics in need of punishment for some imaginary misdeed their ancestors may or may not have ever even THOUGHT of committing.

My Dogs are the biggest Lovers you'll ever met, until they ain't! The Newfie is the biggest lover of all, not an evil bone in his body, BUT, if you so much as sniff funny, or sound funny, or seem off to him, he will show you what the worlds most powerful animal is truly capable of! My Mailnoise is flat out scary, from big snuggle bug, ( the exact opposite of protection dog) to the worlds most dangerous critter, built for pure speed, agility and stealth, with the most amazing brain full of really interesting ideas of how to murder you, brimming with razor sharp teeth in an oversized biter that can tear large chunks off the biggest and meanest dude around, DON'T mess with my puppies!

Twice, My Newf and I have run across people that really gave me the creeps, and my Big Monster let them know with zero doubt what so ever, DO NOT COME ANY CLOSER or I will Kill You and drag the body into the bushes, along with your car! We also had a scary one with the Malinator, lets just say, bad dude got a flash of gleaming white razer blades, and the most insane bark you ever heard, the Doggy version of GTFOH before something really bad happens to you!


Marla, that's what you need, a good Labrador Retriever to protect you and keep you safe, a big Lab is no joke serious, more then capable of puttin the hurt on anyone who comes between you and them! NEVER discount a Retriever, or any of the bigger breeds. Then there is the GSD, the gold standard for serious protection in a family friendly package, though generally goof balls and great big lovers like the retrievers, once you flip their on switch, watch out!

 

[MarlaSinger]

I'm an eye-for-an-eye kind of dude. I don't want to suggest anything nefarious here but why tf should the OP plan on hiding? Maybe prepper pussinboots should be the one planning where to hide. I don't think OP should have to assume to be the victim for life here. Gotta stand up to bullies. Easier said than done I know .....just piszes me off........

I did stand up to him… he put a bullet in me. I am an eye for an eye person myself! Im not taking anything that anyone suggests as any sort of victimization Its all very sound advice and works! You can honestly never be too safe in this world. Sometimes people just arent alright and sometimes it doesn't hurt to hear it from other ppl. Lets me know theres still decent ppl im fighting for in this place

 

[MarlaSinger]

My Dogs are the biggest Lovers you'll ever met, until they ain't! The Newfie is the biggest lover of all, not an evil bone in his body, BUT, if you so much as sniff funny, or sound funny, or seem off to him, he will show you what the worlds most powerful animal is truly capable of! My Mailnoise is flat out scary, from big snuggle bug, ( the exact opposite of protection dog) to the worlds most dangerous critter, built for pure speed, agility and stealth, with the most amazing brain full of really interesting ideas of how to murder you, brimming with razor sharp teeth in an oversized biter that can tear large chunks off the biggest and meanest dude around, DON'T mess with my puppies!

Twice, My Newf and I have run across people that really gave me the creeps, and my Big Monster let them know with zero doubt what so ever, DO NOT COME ANY CLOSER or I will Kill You and drag the body into the bushes, along with your car! We also had a scary one with the Malinator, lets just say, bad dude got a flash of gleaming white razer blades, and the most insane bark you ever heard, the Doggy version of GTFOH before something really bad happens to you!


Marla, that's what you need, a good Labrador Retriever to protect you and keep you safe, a big Lab is no joke serious, more then capable of puttin the hurt on anyone who comes between you and them! NEVER discount a Retriever, or any of the bigger breeds. Then there is the GSD, the gold standard for serious protection in a family friendly package, though generally goof balls and great big lovers like the retrievers, once you flip their on switch, watch out!

I honestly considered a rottweiler But my current living situation wont allow me anthing over 45lbs itll be a future goal for me. I do miss my pit bull sparklug everyday. He was an impressive 75lbs and just the smartest dog. He made it to 13 and then quickly declined. It was the hardest thing ive ever done in my life but completely humane for him

 

[MarlaSinger]

If he tries to contact you make sure and keep a record of it. If he gets a parole hearing that info can be used to keep him inside.

Yes, I also have print outs of the horrible things I found he posted on the internet this dud was one rally away from being a shooter or a bomber you should see the way he romanticized the thought of going to war. Sickening. Dark. Definitely unsavory mental health issues.

 

[Hueco]

Then there is the GSD, the gold standard for serious protection in a family friendly package, though generally goof balls and great big lovers like the retrievers, once you flip their on switch, watch out!

Was going to say, yea - just make sure they're not mixed with a husky because mine is a derp:



That being said, when my mother in law's dog decided to punk out, the switch semi flipped and my pup walled off my daughter and I'm decently certain would have put the hurt on if I hadn't thrown the other dog into another room.

She's been bit by other dogs too aggressive for a dog park and just shrugged it off - but add in my daughter or wife and yea, there's a switch.

Definitely makes me feel better when I'm away.

 

[NeoBlackdog]

I really do forgive him

You're a far better person than I. I'm afraid I'd be planning his demise for after his release.
Glad to hear you're healing. I can't even imagine going through what you've been through.

 

[Kruel J]

Forgiveness is healthy and really the only way to heal and move forward.


Or….stick an umbrella up his azz then open it. Either way………

 

[OldBroad44]

My Dogs are the biggest Lovers you'll ever met, until they ain't! The Newfie is the biggest lover of all, not an evil bone in his body, BUT, if you so much as sniff funny, or sound funny, or seem off to him, he will show you what the worlds most powerful animal is truly capable of! My Mailnoise is flat out scary, from big snuggle bug, ( the exact opposite of protection dog) to the worlds most dangerous critter, built for pure speed, agility and stealth, with the most amazing brain full of really interesting ideas of how to murder you, brimming with razor sharp teeth in an oversized biter that can tear large chunks off the biggest and meanest dude around, DON'T mess with my puppies!

Twice, My Newf and I have run across people that really gave me the creeps, and my Big Monster let them know with zero doubt what so ever, DO NOT COME ANY CLOSER or I will Kill You and drag the body into the bushes, along with your car! We also had a scary one with the Malinator, lets just say, bad dude got a flash of gleaming white razer blades, and the most insane bark you ever heard, the Doggy version of GTFOH before something really bad happens to you!


Marla, that's what you need, a good Labrador Retriever to protect you and keep you safe, a big Lab is no joke serious, more then capable of puttin the hurt on anyone who comes between you and them! NEVER discount a Retriever, or any of the bigger breeds. Then there is the GSD, the gold standard for serious protection in a family friendly package, though generally goof balls and great big lovers like the retrievers, once you flip their on switch, watch out!

Very few Labrador retrievers are protective. And most Newfies arent either. That doesn't mean there aren't individuals in the breeds that are protective. But they aren't what you would get if protection was a concern. At the top of the list for breeds that are often good personal and home protection dogs are German shepherds, Belgian malinois, Dobermans, and Rottweilers. Even with these its best to pick a pup from a family and line known for protection. German shepherds are especially of many lines. Those from seeing eye dog lines need to be mellow with strangers, for example. There are many other breeds on the list, but many of them are also on lists that are banned in certain cities, states, or countries or by many insurance companies and for which ownership of the dog can make your property uninsurable. Breeds of dogs that make good protection dogs are often strongly dominant dogs that need a lot of socialization as pups to avoid their being aggressive with strangers. Big dogs need a lot of food. And mostly don't live all that long. They are generally starting to lose their hearing and/or vision by about age ten and die by about 12. Owning a dog greatly limits where you can live. Most landlords don't rent go people with dogs, especially big dogs.

There is a distinction be tween highly trainable protection dogs, which includes the German shepherds, malinois, and dobermans, and the instinctive/natural protection dogs, that are protective according to their own style whether you want a protection dog or not. The former make good police dogs because they can be more easily molded to be and do just what you want...assuming you are seriously good at training dogs. Not so the instinctive protection dog. The livestock guardian breeds are instinctive types. I had a Chow/Spitz cross. Superb natural protection dog.

There's a distinction between protection/guard dogs and alert dogs. The protection dog usually both barks at anything suspicious and actively protects the owner. This requires a big dog. The alert dog is just expected to sound the alarm, not to try to deal with the problem himself. The alert dog can be small, small enough to fit in a carrier and go on the plane with you. Someone competent with guns may only need an alert dog, being fully capable of dealing with the problem herself if awake.

There are books by expert protection dog trainers that give good info about breeds. Those are the books to read if you are interested in getting a dog for protection or an alarm dog. Most dog books are by people who are only familiar with very people-friendly dogs and not very good for teaching you how to handle and train a serious protection dog. Some breeds of livestock protection dogs make great companion dogs and personal protection dogs. many dont. Where they do, their are usually companion and livestock lines, and those who want livestock protected need to get the livestock lines.

A dog is easy to shoot. And left in a fenced yard, its easy to poison or put to sleep with meat laced tv poison or with sleeping pills unless specifically poison-trained.