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I am not "advocating" anything, other than that nascent shooters should be spared rifle evangelism unless they have range needs similar to yours.
I am saying that there is a very detectable one size fits all approach from the rifle acolytes too.
Most people can shoot a long gun a lot better than they can shoot a pistol unless they have a lot of training and practice. I have heard very few arguments against a defensive shotgun ever, but all of a sudden for you, the format is too long. I have to assume that if the length of an AR is too long, then so is a defensive shotgun.
I just don't buy the authoritative nonsense without knowing each person's experience and type of home.
The last thing I'd grab for home defense in my situation is a pistol. The pistol is reserved for plinking and target practice and daily CCW. If I could conceal an AR, I'd still prefer it to the handgun.