Things Your Dad Used to Say

[HotRod61]

I would like to buy him for what I think he's worth and sell him for what he thinks he's worth and we both could retire.

That usually meant he didn't like the guy.

 

[beavernation]

"one man and a shovel can move a mountain"

"the mark of a great craftsman is the guy who can fix a mistake the best"

"if you hurry you will make mistakes"

"everything in moderation, son"

"the guys that are always talkin about how much sex their getting are the guys who ain't getting any!"

My dad is 79 yrs old in 10 days and still going strong!

 

[rick49]

"Consider yourself rich when you never buy anything with a handle on it"

 

[flashpan]

My best huntin budy and I once sat around a campfire and wrote down close to 40 sayings his and my father would say. I need to to publish these because they are priceless to us and those phrases are fading away.
"Use your head for something else besides a hat rack" ...many more I should not repeat in written form.

 

[Chee-to]

I remember at the dinner table he'd say "take all you want, but you'd better eat all you take"

 

[jbett98]

After being caught performing one of my more imbecilic acts as a young boy, I overheard my Dad mutter under his breath;
"The doctor should have slapped your Mother when you were born for producing such a stupid kid".

 

[d2the3]

I used to have a ultimatum go do whatever I was told "or it's curtains for you"

I knew he meant business but didn't know curtains meant lights out till many years later.

 

[Bon Sauvage]

"Always expect the worst and you'll never be disappointed."

 

[Caveman Jim]

I was the hunter and the youngest in the family, I was told by Dad that "you kill it you will eat it" that crow was the worst tasting bird I ever ate!!!!

 

[brokenarrow]

Use your head for something besides a hat rack.

Children should be seen but not heard.

Fools and children shouldn't look at half done work.

Don't make me get out of this chair.

There are two thins you don't loan out, your guns or your wife.

It's not the noise that kills them.

Better to remain silent and thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.

Those were the days, listening and now wishing I still could.

 

[BrentN]

Ones that can be put here are :

If I didn't put black pepper on my food he would say "Pepper will make your pecker grow",

"It's all pink ........",

and everytime I would go out, it would be the old "If you knock that girl up, your getting a job to support her and the baby"


Ray

Ditto on the last 2.

And yeah, of all the sayings, hard to come up with the ones allowed on the interwebs. You guys realize how ultimate this thread would be if we didn't have to self-censor?

"blah blah start the lawnmower blah blah" I don't remember exactly, as I was fixated on the leather belt coming out of the loops like they were greased. Heck, my folks had a wooden paddle hanging by the back door...the paddle had a picture on it of a kid with his pants around his ankles getting paddled! Luckily, I was a fast learner- I learned how not to get caught.

 

[IheartSig]

My dad had one of those REAL leather belts, the big ones with dual holes and that fastened. It was thick and black as the devils eyes. He would double it over and snap that thing when he needed to really "get my attention". That was the belt he used to instill discipline on me. (not abuse, instill discipline, truthfully). I hated that sound so much.

Manny years later, I have my own son and I did that once, snapped it, as a joke, he didn't understand (I don't use the belt for discipline) but even doing it myself gave me flashbacks and I couldn't do it again. I felt so bad I took him for ice-cream.

He always used to say

Hotter than two rats @#$%$#@ in a wool sock

colder than a well diggers bubblegum

"the thing of it is..."

and the one that's served me best ... "Do you NEED it, or do you WANT it..?"

 

[deadeye]

You borrow my tools they better be back where you got em and they better be clean. (He worked on air craft on carriers second trip to Korea).

Do that again and the next person wiping your backside will be the undertaker.

I'm on my last nerve and your workin on it, knock it off.

You don't pick a fight but know how to end it. He taught hand to hand, I learned a lot.

There are a lot that can't be written here. My parents met when they were both in the Navy so I got it from both sides. Dad was also in the Air Force and the Marines so suffice it to say growing up was interesting. You should have seen the look on my sons face the first time I told him he had KP duty.

 

[Bon Sauvage]

"Tell me if this hurts."

 

[Bon Sauvage]

"Come here and take your medicine like a man."

 

[salmonriverjohn]

Don't take two steps in the wrong direction if it's going to take you three to get back going in the right one.

 

[No_Regerts]

"You never seem to have enough time to do it right, so I'll make time for you to do it over again."

 

[gunfreak]

Clean as a cats a$$

 

[jbett98]

"Why did I ever have kids!"

 

[Bon Sauvage]

"You make my asss want to chew tobacco."