What have you used as monumental motivation to achieve a goal?

[Cavedweller]

What does it take?


This is the question I am trying to find an answer to.

Let's start at the beginning. What is the behavior you want to change?

 

[arakboss]

Let's start at the beginning. What is the behavior you want to change?

Good question, let me think about that for a bit.

 

[arakboss]

Let's start at the beginning. What is the behavior you want to change?

The behaviors I would like to change that pertain to my goal of living longer independently are:

I tend to rely on extrinsic motivations to accomplish goals. These work fine for short term goals but not as well for long term goals. I would like to switch that reliance on extrinsic motivators for intrinsic motivators, at least for longer term goals.

Secondly, I tend to live in the now and don't look out years and decades to see how current actions might impact my future welfare. This happens with health choices, finance management, social engagement, etc. I would like to change that and start looking at longer term consequences of current actions, more often.

 

[arakboss]

Spoiler there wasn't many regrets. I hope I will feel that way when I am 90.

View: https://youtu.be/RMTm5NOVqJ8?feature=shared

View: https://youtu.be/EDlR4tKDg2A?feature=shared

 

[WillametteWill]

A goal of living a long, healthy and independent life, would also have to include some risk mitigation. Rock climbing, visiting Portland, driving like a maniac, crossing 82nd at night dressed in all black, etc would be out.

I was a rock climber for decades, headed to PDX on Thursday, used to race Karts on the big tracks, and spent a career directing traffic in a dark uniform with no vest at night. Shall we add running with guns in the mix? How did I make it to 60???

I laughed out loud a little on this one and almost woke my wife up...

Me too But seriously, good luck on your quest.

To do all of the above I joked (but was serious) about, they take/took a focused mindset and a decision to do them well. They are all things that kill you if you do them poorly. So is taking care of our health. I've been struggling with some injury recovery this past year and ready to get back into the gym. I borrow my mindset from Jerry Rice, "Today I will do what others won't, so tomorrow I can do what others can't."

Slàinte Mhath

 

[arakboss]

I was a rock climber for decades, headed to PDX on Thursday, used to race Karts on the big tracks, and spent a career directing traffic in a dark uniform with no vest at night. Shall we add running with guns in the mix? How did I make it to 60???

Me too But seriously, good luck on your quest.

To do all of the above I joked (but was serious) about, they take/took a focused mindset and a decision to do them well. They are all things that kill you if you do them poorly. So is taking care of our health. I've been struggling with some injury recovery this past year and ready to get back into the gym. I borrow my mindset from Jerry Rice, "Today I will do what others won't, so tomorrow I can do what others can't."

Slàinte Mhath

I was a rock climber for decades, headed to PDX on Thursday, used to race Karts on the big tracks, and spent a career directing traffic in a dark uniform with no vest at night. Shall we add running with guns in the mix? How did I make it to 60???

Lady luck or Guardian Angel

 

[Cavedweller]

The behaviors I would like to change that pertain to my goal of living longer independently are:

I tend to rely on extrinsic motivations to accomplish goals. These work fine for short term goals but not as well for long term goals. I would like to switch that reliance on extrinsic motivators for intrinsic motivators, at least for longer term goals.

That sounds more like a state of mind than behavior. How is that expressed in terms of actual behaviors? When you can identify those specific behaviors, you can work on changing them. Start by making a list of the things you DO because of that tendency.

Secondly, I tend to live in the now and don't look out years and decades to see how current actions might impact my future welfare. This happens with health choices, finance management, social engagement, etc. I would like to change that and start looking at longer term consequences of current actions, more often.

You have identified 3 areas of concern. Good places to start. Don't try to do too much all at once. Write them down. Under each of those headings, write down 3 things you'd like to change. Prioritize them from most to least important. For the most important in each category, set a concrete, realistic (can I actually achieve it?) and measurable goal (e.g. I want to have no credit card debt by such and such date). Then, when you are tempted to make a purchase on credit, ask yourself, "Will this help me reach my goal?" If the answer is "No", don't do it.

"Will this help me reach my goal?" is the criterion by which to evaluate your decisions. But first you have to identify those goals.

A tree diagram can be helpful. Start with the ultimate goal on the left (to live independently into old age). Then break it down into finer levels of detail (the branches) until you arrive at specific, actionable, and concrete objectives. Here is a good explanation:

MindTools | Home

Essential skills for an excellent career

www.mindtools.com

It takes some work, but I hope these suggestions will be helpful. Good luck.

 

[arakboss]

That sounds more like a state of mind than behavior. How is that expressed in terms of actual behaviors? When you can identify those specific behaviors, you can work on changing them. Start by making a list of the things you DO because of that tendency.

You have identified 3 areas of concern. Good places to start. Don't try to do too much all at once. Write them down. Under each of those headings, write down 3 things you'd like to change. Prioritize them from most to least important. For the most important in each category, set a concrete, realistic (can I actually achieve it?) and measurable goal (e.g. I want to have no credit card debt by such and such date). Then, when you are tempted to make a purchase on credit, ask yourself, "Will this help me reach my goal?" If the answer is "No", don't do it.

"Will this help me reach my goal?" is the criterion by which to evaluate your decisions. But first you have to identify those goals.

A tree diagram can be helpful. Start with the ultimate goal on the left (to live independently into old age). Then break it down into finer levels of detail (the branches) until you arrive at specific, actionable, and concrete objectives. Here is a good explanation:

MindTools | Home

Essential skills for an excellent career

www.mindtools.com

It takes some work, but I hope these suggestions will be helpful. Good luck.

I appreciate your advice on how to achieve my goal and I will save it to mind.
My main focus now is discovering the Why I want to achieve my goal. If I don't have a powerful enough reason to as to why I want to achieve my goal then my chances of success are low. I was hoping to hear from others what their reasons were for achieving large and distant goals. Maybe some of those reasons will resonate with me or inspire me to come with my own why.

There will likely be more than one why to achieve my goal but at least one of them will have to be a really big and important one.


Edit: I visited my mother the other day and shared my goal of living into my 90s independently. Her response was why would you want to live that long since the world is going to heck in a handbasket (I am paraphrasing her, she believes we our at end times). I honestly didn't have a good answer for her. If I don't have a very powerful reason for wanting to live into my 90s, I won't make much effort to get there.

 

[Cavedweller]

I appreciate your advice on how to achieve my goal and I will save it to mind.
My main focus now is discovering the Why I want to achieve my goal. If I don't have a powerful enough reason to as to why I want to achieve my goal then my chances of success are low. I was hoping to hear from others what their reasons were for achieving large and distant goals. Maybe some of those reasons will resonate with me or inspire me to come with my own why.


Edit: I visited my mother the other day and shared my goal of living into my 90s independently. Her response was why would you want to live that long since the world is going to heck in a handbasket (I am paraphrasing her, she believes we our at end times). I honestly didn't have a good answer for her. If I don't have a very powerful reason for wanting to live into my 90s, I won't make much effort to get there.

The question is not necessarily how long you want to live. That is not always up to you. Genetics and other factors play an important role, and some of those things are beyond your control. However, your goal of wanting to live independently, for as long as the good Lord intends in your case, is a worthy one. Do you want to end up a drooling vegetable in a nursing home in your "golden years?" Perhaps if you volunteered in a nursing home for a while and saw how people live there, that would provide some motivation.

 

[arakboss]

The question is not necessarily how long you want to live. That is not always up to you. Genetics and other factors play an important role, and some of those things are beyond your control. However, your goal of wanting to live independently, for as long as the good Lord intends in your case, is a worthy one. Do you want to end up a drooling vegetable in a nursing home in your "golden years?" Perhaps if you volunteered in a nursing home for a while and saw how people live there, that would provide some motivation.

Do you want to end up a drooling vegetable in a nursing home in your golden years?


No I don't and that will be going on my "Why" list. I'd like to add to my goal "enjoyably", I would like to live enjoyably into my 90s and remain independent up to my last breath.