I like the episode where Hank tags along on one of his house exterminations.
Dale and Hank are in this big mansion that Dale has a tarp over the whole mansion in which the owners had to vacate for a few days until all the pesticides aired out. For those that do not know a "bidet" is another way to clean your "area" without the use of toilet paper, and it does through pressurized water.
Dale: Would you like to take a spin on the bidet? Ha! Or did you think it was a drinking fountain? ...I did!
Another quote I like by him
Nancy Gribble: I like your tie...
Dale: Thanks! I found it on the ground...
Cotton: The DMV changed the damn eye chart and wouldn't renew my license!
Dale: There are ways around the license problem sir...
Hank: (interupts) Dale this doesn't concern you
Dale: For example, you could put a sail on your car and call it...a boat.
Cotton: Hear that Hank! Gribble's got a clever idea! Go get me a sail!
Hank: Its a stupid idea!
Dale: Well I guess I'm not as clever as you are Hank! I mean I could never think of a clever idea like switching up the eye charts so your dad would fail that test! Geh!
Hank: Dammit DALE!!
Cotton: Ohhhh, looks like we got ourselves a Benedict Arlen! What have you got to say for yourself Boyyy!?
Hank: Its true dad, I did change those eye charts, you should not be driving.
Dale: But he's a war hero! A world war hero! You should let him do whatever he wants!
Dale talking to FBI investigator
Dale: Well should I or should I not know that every Megalo Mart employee has a $5,000 life insurance policy on them?
Investigator: Thats nonsense, this is a straight forward investigation
Dale: Thats what "they" want you to think.
Investigator: Sir...We are They
Dale: Geh!
Hank: Have you slept Dale? You're starting to get that 'County Fair' smell.
Dale: Its finally making sense...Oswald...my mower...Grassy...nole? eh?
Hank: Aw come on Dale, that picture doesn't even look real!
Dale: Well I'd love to live in your "fairy tale" world Hank! But the Fairplay for Cuba committee is retrofitting my mower to power Fidel Castro's one man escape sub!
Hank: Aw...come on Dale Lighten up! Have a beer!
Dale: No Beer...Gotta stay sharp (walks off)
Bill: He's going crazy!
Hank: I think we should give the mower back to him... We're putting extra stress on a structure that wasn't up to code in the first place!
Dale: One shot on the way down takes out the Gribble problem! Then the Cuban Robot soldiers have only Steve Wynn standing between them, and Wichita!