It's Been 40-Years...

[Pandaz3]

I am responding to the OP without reading everyone else's response.

We had a SD9VE and loved the ergonomics, controls and ease of racking and everything but the trigger. The trigger was a show stopper for us and we got a Glock 17 then. I have a LCP II and love the trigger on it and I understand the Security 9 is better. I think you are only $40 or $50 apart. I recommend the Ruger.

 

[DeanMk]

...since I've owned a gun. That means I haven't kept up on things at all. I've been shooting several times with friends, and am ready to purchase one so I'm not always using theirs.

The main use will be range, plinking, and home defense. From what I've read, a good all-around caliber is 9mm as it's large enough to be useful and common enough to be relatively cheap to shoot. I don't have a lot to spend, so Glocks, Sig Sauer's, and the like are not realistic purchases for me. My wife has never shot anything before, so the plan is to start her on a friend's .22. If she takes to it at all, she'll move to the 9mm quickly. Still, recoil should be kept to a minimum in whatever I choose. Another consideration will be grip size. Her hands are smaller than mine. For reference, the Bersa Thunder .380ACP fir her hand perfectly, while it felt too small for mine.

I had initially settled on the Ruger Security 9. Stretched the budget a bit, but seems to be well made from what I read. Grip was more to my liking but seemed small enough that it might work for my wife as well. (She won't go gun shopping with me.) Then I started reading about the S&W SD9VE. Not only is it available for less money, but seems to be well thought of in this price range. Now, I can't make up my mind. Any advice, information, caveats, etc.?

You haven't missed much.
Winchesters 94 (or 70), 37 (or 101) and a K-frame Smith is still about all you'll ever need.
Only difference is these days, the total cost for those guns will be about 1000 times more than it was 40 years ago ( ).
Yeah, 9mm or .38 Special will probably fill the bill for what you're looking for.
Used market is still the place for deals. If you have dealer near you, check the net and have them get whichever gun for you.
I think the charge for using their FFL is usually about 10-15% of your cost for the gun.

Dean