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Same!Dammit ThrowAway Wagon - where art thou? I can't see any reason for you to have been banned. Really worried about you.
If there is anyway you can IM me and let me know; I don't believe mods would have a cow if you started an acct just to send one IM.
If you are in a bad way, please reach out. As someone I consider an inspiration and a friend, I do care .