Neighbor's 3-Legged Dog Keeps Cr*pping on my Lawn.. What to Do?

[Sasquatchvnv]

If you have some time, train the dog to eat his own crap. Many dogs are not averse to this. That way, it'll always go back with him and he'll be breathing that all over the neighbor's house.

Bacon Grease....

 

[buick455]

I have a suggestion and I will try to make this as clean as possable

seems to me the problem isn't really the dog but the guy who ignores it so I have a solution but it's not for the faint of heart.

STEP 1: go to a asian-mart in a near by town and buy a noodie magazine you know the really trashy kind.

STEP 2: find the ads in the back that say 5 videos for 10 bucks and pick out some odd ones. even from a few different warehouses.

STEP 3: fill out the paper work with this poor guys name and ad the appropriate amount of cash.

STEP 4: drop it in a big blue mail box

THE RESULT= they may or may not send the videos but the will send ads and catalogs they will also sell his name and address with the rest of that disturbing world and his mail box will be FULL every day with un-wraped (no black wrappers) noodie mags and such
it could get so bad he might just move, I know of one guy who almost got a divorce before they moved

 

[Bigbaddude]

This is a funny a** thread. It makes up for
The lack of zombie threads. Hope it keeps going it's a good read while I slave away at work

 

[jordanvraptor]

This thread is certainly a new take on the phrase "Get off my lawn..."

Hope you get it resolved peacefully. They make biodegradable airsoft pellets now... Just kidding.

 

[olydemon]

While there are some great suggestions here, Really you just need to call the police to deal with the issue.....

Heres how it would go...

Reno 911 Video

 

[4Freedom]

While there are some great suggestions here, Really you just need to call the police to deal with the issue.....

Heres how it would go...

Reno 911 Video

OMG!!!! I just pissed my pants!! That was too freakin funny.. I am going to send that video around to a few people..

 

[spider]

Time to make it a two legged dog

 

[nwwoodsman]

Consider yourself lucky. My wife called me at work the other day to tell me she was shoveling up crap in the yard, left there by the midget horses from across the streets...and midget horses don't make midget road apples

 

[Cougfan2]

While there are some great suggestions here, Really you just need to call the police to deal with the issue.....

Heres how it would go...

Reno 911 Video

I'd seen this before, but I had forgotten how freakin' funny it was.

 

[mjbskwim]

My dad told me the Filipinos that used to farm the Puyallup valley would use corn cobs some how

Now how did that work?

I would throw the shhhhtuff back in his yard.I used to throw it out in the street because I didn't really know who's dog it was.That way all the folks down my side road got a bit of it.

 

[22many]

My dad told me the Filipinos that used to farm the Puyallup valley would use corn cobs some how

Now how did that work?

I would throw the shhhhtuff back in his yard.I used to throw it out in the street because I didn't really know who's dog it
was.That way all the folks down my side road got a bit of it.

I thought filipinos eat dog?

 

[deadshot2]

Collect a few days "deposits" and use it to fill a pre-baked pie shell. Cover the feces with whipped cream from a can and leave it on the neighbors porch as a "peace offering". Include a Hallmark Card if you wish.

 

[jlprtr]

Time to make it a two legged dog

Wouldn't that just add a "skidmark" to the equation?

 

[aslinged]

Solution: http://www.nytimes.com/2011/07/02/us/02dogs.html?_r=1&ref=us

 

[deadshot2]

Solution: http://www.nytimes.com/2011/07/02/us/02dogs.html?_r=1&ref=us

There's even a business opportunity in Dog Crap.

 

[MarkAd]

Paint ball gun.
There CEF now it is a gun question

 

[deadshot2]

Paint ball gun.
There CEF now it is a gun question

Do they make a Turpentine filled paint ball?

 

[darkminstrel]

Do they make a Turpentine filled paint ball?

Got a syringe?

 

[oa98pistol512]

I have several dogs and to get them to quit going where I dont want them to go I throw cayan or some kind of concentrated chilly pepper this works exellent get video camera!!!And watch him howl... cheap and effective

 

[speelyei]

I feel for you, that sucks. Moving is expensive and a hassle and chances are you have settled where you need to be, not where you want to be.

Personally, I don't get tipped over by dogs bubblegumting in my yard, or bees. I am unable to relate on that level. I have had cats, goats, and dogs (mine and others) ruin the paint on our vehicles, our horses and the neighbors cattle (over a hundred head) ruin our lawn, and bees and hornets (among more benign bugs) move into our house and barn repeatedly.

Now, that being said, you are the new transplant to Hood River. In my opinion, the onus is on you to bend to the community, not the other way around. Obviously a lot of the killing/poisoning/flaming bag of bubblegum suggestions were made as jokes... but showing up out of the blue and creating a ruckus is not likely to endear you to your new neighbors. Let it ride for a little while.