Do you tell your wife how much stuff really costs?

[oknow]

If you gotta lie you need to grow a set.......

 

[Goosebrown]

I tell my wife for the most part. On reloading and ammo, I don't make a point of it, but on large ticket items I always tell her and even ask before. She's good as long as we can afford it and she gets things she needs and wants too.

 

[Slobray]

She might ask "Is that new?" To which a reply of "Nope, Ive had it for a while" is completely honest.

A week is "a while"

That was my go to, but with my wife it doesn't work very well because of follow up questions...


Wife: "Is that new?"
Ray: "No, I've had this for a while"
Wife: "When'd you get it"
Ray: " A while ago, couple, maybe three weeks"
Wife: "Why haven't I seen it before?"
Ray: "I must have forgot/I didn't really think you were interested/you don't show me everything you buy/other lame excuses......"
Wife: "There's no way you would forget about getting a new gun/You know I'm always interested in things that make you happy/I do show you everything I buy, I say "look what you bought me today"/other retorts....."
Ray: "Uh, well, um...."
Wife: "Why do you think that you need to hide things from me? Why do you need to keep secrets?"


For me, it's just much easier (and better for my marriage) to just say "Honey, look what I bought" and take the heat (if there is any heat to take), than it is to argue about lying/keeping secrets/hiding things.


Ray

 

[40calruler]

I have hobbies that make me money and that is how I can afford the things I want.

Yep, That is what I do. Buying, fixing, and selling mopeds, dirt bikes and such makes enough to keep me in new toys. Plus every time I get a new enduro up and street legal I wonder if I want to money for fishing gear and guns or the bike more! At this point that is out. I have "claimed" 3 of my projects of my own and I am pretty sure the question of how much I spend on guns will not matter if she shoots me for having a 4th bike I am not selling.
The real answer is hell yes though. I tell my wife everything but when a gun runs over a grand I will never volunteer that it is even in the house. I will not lie if asked but she only gets into the little pistol safe. Larger safe she does not care about......Well she does not think she should care about it!

 

[40calruler]

Those that say "grow a set" are clearly not married. You marry a smart woman and turns out no matter how much you wear the pants you aint running a damned thing anymore. It is all "up to a vote" in which your vote is just noise and does not really count.
Get used to it or get used to divorce.

 

[Joe13]

Those that say "grow a set" are clearly not married. You marry a smart woman and turns out no matter how much you wear the pants you aint running a damned thing anymore. It is all "up to a vote" in which your vote is just noise and does not really count.
Get used to it or get used to divorce.

Truth!

I've never been accused of needing to grow a set and I at best have a 50/50 say on most things around the house - but 90% of that stuff I really don't care about, I'm happy shes running the ship most the time.

My wifes IQ is about on par with mine so she is WELL aware what my toys cost, but there is no reason to flaunt it in front of her - someone put it very well, I buy guns and ammo as an investment. If I get to shoot them great, but I always can get at least what I paid for them and I have sold my toys when my wife or daughter needed or wanted anything.

The stuff my wife buys is not resellable and I have no way to make any money back from those purchases so it's not and apples to apples situation.

Yes, I have 21 years with the same and only woman I've married and I can't see an end in sight considering what we have made it thru thus far.

 

[40calruler]

Truth!

I've never been accused of needing to grow a set and I at best have a 50/50 say on most things around the house - but 90% of that stuff I really don't care about, I'm happy shes running the ship most the time.

My wifes IQ is about on par with mine so she is WELL aware what my toys cost, but there is no reason to flaunt it in front of her - someone put it very well, I buy guns and ammo as an investment. If I get to shoot them great, but I always can get at least what I paid for them and I have sold my toys when my wife or daughter needed or wanted anything.

The stuff my wife buys is not resellable and I have no way to make any money back from those purchases so it's not and apples to apples situation.

Yes, I have 21 years with the same and only woman I've married and I can't see an end in sight considering what we have made it thru thus far.

Yep. That is my thought process. She takes most of my cash but I do not have to worry about things being handled. Bills get paid and I have enough for my hobbies so I do not care what she buys.
I would tell her that my stuff can be sold if needed and hers cannot but I like living too much for that.
If I stop posting it is either because I was dumb enough to bring up what she buys or because she takes a look in the big safe....Living on the edge here!

 

[solv3nt]

Before we got married, I told my wife that I would be purchasing a new gun each year.

 

[IronMonster]

One thing that is a big consideration in my household is.... even though I own a small biz its my wife that is the major bread winner. She is an accountant. Worked for the same company for 23 years.

She buys her own stuff and has her own money. Our system is pretty simple. We have our joint funds and we each have our own accounts. Every other week we put equal amounts into our joint account and all the house bills are paid out of that. As long as I am current keeping our joint account funded there are never any questions ask about what I am buying.

She is a numbers person and a stickler about the 50/50 contribution of funds. If we are making a major purchase (like a new RV or expensive vacation) Its assumed we will each contribute equally. Almost always the problem is I dont have my half. She is a saver, she talks herself out of just about everything and needs very little. I on the other hand dont believe in paper money or the bank so most everything I have is expressed somehow in a tangible good. My "savings" is in the form of gold & silver, Tools and equipment or guns and ammo...

And since she is an accountant and does all my books, she knows just about everything that goes on. I do keep a cash slush fund from buying and selling personal things and I try and use that money for anything personal but I dont even have a personal checking account. All my credit cards and bank accounts are business ones.

If I am late or behind getting cash into our joint account and am buying new toys, Well then there will be hell to pay. If I do my part I am golden. She may shake her head at me for buying a $4000 rifle but that's about as severe as it gets.

 

[Velzey]

I have an addiction, and my wife has to be involved!

 

[3MTA3]

My wife put a $50 limit on gifts I buy her.


The gift that resulted in the $50 limit was a little silver bobble I bought at a knife show. hand made, raised out of silver and copper. Beautiful little pendent kind of thing. I gave it too her and all was good for a few days and then I saw she had put it on her key chain. I said "maybe that is not the right place for that, its gonna get wrecked on your key chain" She said "Why, was it expensive?" Which like I said, she asks I'll be honest. I had paid $300 for it, which considering what it was I dont think was excessive. She flipped out,

"YOU PAID HOW MUCH FOR THIS!!!!!!!!" "That's it! From now on you cant spend more than $50 on a gift for me!!"

Ok, hunny, ok....

How much would it cost for your wife to talk to my wife? CAUTION - this could backfire on you and turn into the Jared's commercial from hell.

 

[3MTA3]

My wife makes frequent inexpensive (usually...) purchases all the time. I make very infrequent purchases which are usually much more expensive. Because of that she was always complaining about how much I spent. It got pretty bad and one day I sat her down and showed her the numbers. She didn't know how much all the small purchases were adding up, and in fact I was spending about half of what she did on non-essentials, and not only that I could recoup at least 75% of what I pay for my "toys".

BTW a great way to get them thinking is to ask how much a linear foot of clothes costs them. It's pretty stunning and for my wife it's about $100/inch, and that's not even with very expensive clothing as you can easily fit four $25 dollar garments in an inch. That foot of things they haven't worn in a year is equal to a decent rifle and scope.

 

[40calruler]

This is exactly like me when I grab some cash without getting an OK first. Eff the man...err woman

 

[AMT]

My wife makes frequent inexpensive (usually...) purchases all the time. I make very infrequent purchases which are usually much more expensive. Because of that she was always complaining about how much I spent. It got pretty bad and one day I sat her down and showed her the numbers. She didn't know how much all the small purchases were adding up, and in fact I was spending about half of what she did on non-essentials, and not only that I could recoup at least 75% of what I pay for my "toys".

This is exactly what I do too.

Plus I always point out that my family has never gone without. If that time ever comes that I am putting my addiction first, I will sell everything. Well, almost everything, and keeping just the basics.

 

[Liberty97045]

Incident #1
I purchased a new Guide Gun and was sneaking it into the gun safe which at the time was in the laundry room closet. (after all, it worked before) when who comes around the corner but the spousal unit! "What's in the box?". Totally busted I threw myself on the mercy of the court "It was an impulse purchase, I'm sorry it will never happen again".

Incident #2
Several years later, we tore down the half of our house with our bedroom so we could build our addition. our bed moved into the tiny dining room and most of our stuff moved out to the shop. It was late November before we were ready to move into our new digs. When I moved the gun safe back, all the guns were cold and the house was warm. To prevent condensation, I opened the actions and laid all the guns out on the bed.
She walked in and her jaw dropped, "I didn't know you had that many!". . . ("CRAP!").

I think she has decided that ignorance is bliss when it comes to my hobby.

 

[Certaindeaf]

Dang tootin' I do. I tell her my kisses are priceless.
Who am I kidding, I don't even got a houseplant.

 

[mudpie]

Wow, I didn't expect so many replies - I guess this issue resonates with many. In my case I have money set aside for bills, retirement, kids college funds so the money I spend is disposable income. However, the wife just doesn't value my hobbies and though I don't need to ask for permission to buy things she gets annoyed when I spend money on, say tools, when she thinks the money would be better spent on vacations or whatever. Even if I grew a set like some suggest and tell my wife the true cost of things it would still put my wife in a bad mood. Married people know how difficult life gets when the wife is in a bad mood so I like to avoid that as much as possible...

 

[40calruler]

"grow a sack" is another way of saying "I never get any and talk out of my a$$".

Married men may say it but only when there is no chance the wife is looking. I get a little hint of fear just typing it.....She is like homeland defense. Type a couple key words and it alerts her....I am so scared right now.

 

[blackadder]

For the most part...she knows what guns I have and roughly how much they cost, and I am trying to get her into carrying, so its pretty hard to get something by her. This is especially true when it comes pistols. However, when it comes to reloading components, gun parts, or accessories....let's just say she might be a bit shocked.

 

[Certaindeaf]

"grow a sack" is another way of saying "I never get any and talk out of my a$$".

Married men may say it but only when there is no chance the wife is looking. I get a little hint of fear just typing it.....She is like homeland defense. Type a couple key words and it alerts her....I am so scared right now.

Oh you poor man. Your savior is here.. there's a motivational pop song on the radio lately.. it's called "Baby I'm Worth Tit!" (they play it about 80 times a day on all the channels).. quite refreshing and inspiring in this day and age.
Go forth. You are worth tit!