Calling all babies daddies...

[KONE KILLER]

Alright, so my wife is due November 8th... We went through our first birthing class last night...
I kinda feel like a d'bag, but I am keeping my fingers crossed that it comes a bit early while I am crew chief at a Chump Car race October 28th and 29th and I dont make it....
Normaly, I am fine for being next to my wife while she is at the hospital and want to be with her (I spent 19 hrs+ a day when she had her Crohns), but for some reason, I just have a really bad feeling about being at the hospital when the kid is born....

Cant figure it out, and my coworkers say I will be super excited, but I dont think so... I am excited to have a kid yes, but not that nasty gooey, stuff falling out part at the hospital....

I dont think its a matter of me just manning up to it, it just seems more than that....


Sooooo.... My question for you guys... Did any of you miss your children being born? Did the ones that did watch, love it, think it was the best thing since the Super Bowl being on TV??? Or was it like, ohhh yeah!! gooo and a baby....

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[Burt Gummer]

I feel pity.

 

[Joe Link]

First of all, congrats! I've never been through this, so I can't comment.

I can comment on Chump Car, I sure miss it. I was one of the original members on the Rolls Royce E30 team, before I quit my job and had to give it up

 

[slimmer13]

Yeah I loved it. The Doc even let me glove up and catch my daughter. I am not the squeemish type and it didnt bother me in the least but everyone is different.

Everyone said that I would cry like a baby but I didnt shed a tear. For me it was more like watching something fascinating from a scientific point of view rather than some deep emotional and spiritual experience (that came after, when I got to know her) like I have heard some fathers describe it.

You will be fine. Good luck!

 

[Kimber Custom]

I was in the room for both of my girls. I didn't spend any time at 'that' end of the process. I stayed up by my wife's head and coached her. I'm not sure I would have regretted not being there but I'm fairly sure I would have never heard the end of it if I wasn't.

 

[KONE KILLER]

Burt, thanks... Pitty is needed....
Joe, that is a cool car! They were pitted up the wall a couple spots from us October. I am with the grey cloud Rx7. We finished 9th both days and that was our first weekend racing it.

Slimer, its not really squeemish, its more of a when you were a kid and you saw the van with 'free candy' on the side and you knew he didnt have any Snickers bars in the back....

 

[deadeye]

If you want to see goo try being in the room while she has a C section. Not that bad, similar to cleaning a deer.

 

[KONE KILLER]

Kimber, that was another thing too! I am bad at remembering stuff under pressure, I dont think I would be a very good coach either.
I told her my aunt would do a wayyy better job at the breathing thing and keeping her calm, but I got the stare of death so I didnt bring it up again....
Just when I thought I had her figured out, things have gotten weird...

 

[Kimber Custom]

Kimber, that was another thing too! I am bad at remembering stuff under pressure, I dont think I would be a very good coach either.
I told her my aunt would do a wayyy better job at the breathing thing and keeping her calm, but I got the stare of death so I didnt bring it up again....
Just when I thought I had her figured out, things have gotten weird...

There's really nothing to remember. Just help keep her breathing calm and give her something to focus on.

 

[Benihaus]

Its easy, and you can always look away at the nasty bits, my recommendation is to watch and be a part of everything up until the placenta .. that is nasty as heck. I actually cut my daughters umbilical cord and then the nurse asked if I wanted to save the placenta???!!!!! she said people do all sorts of weird stuff with it.. blech

 

[accessbob]

I was with my wife for all 3 of ours and I got to cut the cord for 2 of the 3 (the third was in distress so I had to stay back while they hurried to get him breathing). I am squeamish about the goo and stuff too and I made a point of it to NOT be down there when the placenta and stuff came out. But I was watching the 3 of them come out and I am glad I did. It was great.

A side story for you - I had written a song for my daughter (my first child) while she was still in the womb and sang it daily/nightly to her while in the womb. When she came out and the doctor and nurses were poking and prodding her, she was not happy and was screaming the way new borns do. Well I started singing that song and she stopped crying completely and turned her head towards where I was. That was such a cool feeling and I get goosebumps every time I think of it (for example now while writing this).

 

[ZigZagZeke]

Dude, be there at all costs. You'll never be able to make it up to her, no matter what she says now.

Our last one (my third girl) was born at home in the hot tub. No big deal. The midwives handed our daughter to me and I was the one to declare "It's a girl!" Then they cleaned everybody up and mom and baby took a nap.

If you're going to be in a hospital your wife will need somebody to keep things going the way she wants them to. Something like a third of all births these days are by caesarean section, mostly because Doc has a golf date and doesn't want to be there into the wee hours waiting for mom to be ready. Caesarean births are easy. It's the following 6 weeks or so of mom's incapacitation (can't lift anything, including the baby) while trying to deal with a new baby that sucks. So make darn sure there's a good reason if they offer a caesarean to your wife. She'll typically be in no condition to think for herself.

And BTW, if you're smart you'll be really enthusiastic about breast feeding. Or maybe you like boiling water on the stove at 3 am, I dunno.

 

[JackThompson]

Man up you wuss. :gun09:

It's not about what you feel, or if it makes you woozie.

It's about your girl, and the fact that she has no choice but to be there. What you feel won't be anything compared to what she will go through, so you owe it to her, at the very absolute least to be there and face/meet your baby the instant it's born. She might not say it, but she will remember for the rest of your life that you're "Mostly" there for her... as long as it's not yucky.

Take pride in what you've done. Bring that child into this world and protect it from it's first breath until your last.

There is no other "Right" or "Wrong" way to do it.

 

[JackThompson]

+1 on the breastfeeding as well. Makes smarter/healthier/stronger humans.

P.S.
You may even come across some nurses or docs that don't have that great a bedside manner. If someone isn't treating your wife like she's the queen of their world, it's up to you to step in on her behalf.

 

[KONE KILLER]

Slimer, its not really squeemish, its more of a when you were a kid and you saw the van with 'free candy' on the side and you knew he didnt have any Snickers bars in the back....

Dunno if you didnt see this part Jack...
Not about squeemish, its something else...
Cant figure it out...

 

[IheartGUNS]

I'm not gonna lie, but watching a vajayjay stretch as big as a melon, while a male doc touching my woman's private was not pleasant...I nearly fainted when they pulled out the placenta...And for some damn reason, I kept thinking about coneheads.

 

[SDR]

And BTW, if you're smart you'll be really enthusiastic about breast feeding. Or maybe you like boiling water on the stove at 3 am, I dunno.[/QUOTE]


I'm almost fifty, My youngest is 21 and I'm still enthusiastic about breast feeding ...

 

[KONE KILLER]

LMAO!!!

 

[Nutty4Guns]

Man up you wuss. :gun09:

It's not about what you feel, or if it makes you woozie.

It's about your girl, and the fact that she has no choice but to be there. What you feel won't be anything compared to what she will go through, so you owe it to her, at the very absolute least to be there and face/meet your baby the instant it's born. She might not say it, but she will remember for the rest of your life that you're "Mostly" there for her... as long as it's not yucky.

Take pride in what you've done. Bring that child into this world and protect it from it's first breath until your last.

There is no other "Right" or "Wrong" way to do it.

This is the right answer. I was there the entire time with my wife and I got to cut the cord. It was the greatest day of my life.

 

[jayleno]

Was around for both of my girl's births - and was worried about the yuck factor too - but I swore I'd be there, and so I was.

Didn't grab anything, didn't cut anything, didn't catch anything - but I was the first to hold the most gorgeous cleaned-up baby born that day - and there was nothing like that - abso-f'ing-nothing.

Look her in the face, hold her hand (or, more accurately, let her try to mash yours like a grape), and tell her you're glad your there for her.

Pays off over time - and, like SDR, my youngest is 12 and I'm still a huge breastfeeding fan.