Bout to get banned from the living room

[DivCurlGrad72]

Well that's better than the Brits, where throwing a hairbrush or insulting the perp's choice in footwear are considered to be self defense.

From askthe.police.uk:

Q589: Are there any legal self defence products that I can buy?

The only fully legal self defence product at the moment is a rape alarm.
:
You must not get a product which is made or adapted to cause a person injury. Possession of such a product in public (and in private in specific circumstances) is against the law.

 

[bolus]

Why are you watching the news? That's your first problem. If you came here and said "I'm about to drop an engine block on my toe, I'll let you know how much my toe hurts in a bit" that would be the same thing.

 

[Enginerd]

oi you got a loicense for that hairbrush?

 

[Just_Dave]

Never forget the time I got detained at Heathrow while LEAVING the UK for having one of these in my large passport travel wallet after being there for 10 days.

Credit Card Knife

Lots of questions:

1. Where did I get it? (From a website a long, long time ago, in a land far, far away, on a whimsy, whimy, whim...I blame late night internet surfing...)
2. How come I didn't declare it on the way in? (Uh, um, forgot it was there, not much of a knife after all, seriously...)
3. How did I get it past security on the way into Her Majesty's Kingdom? (Uhmmm, scanners at SeaTac International (We're-World-Class-after-all) Airport didn't care, and in America, this isn't really a knife...)
4. Had I brandished it or used it while in the UK? (Ok, no, remember that part where I said I forgot about it...?)
5. We have to file a report, I hope you don't miss your flight. (Yeah, me too, I guess...this is comically fun...)
6. We have to confiscate it. (Sure, ok, you save me the trouble of throwing it away so I don't alarm a flight crew by some weird mistake of my travel wallet falling open...)

The cop was actually pretty cool, almost seemed embarrassed and said it was a formality and I'd go on record in the event I tried to do something similar in the future, that way they could see a pattern. I jokingly told him I was part of a credit card knife smuggling ring and our specialty was one knife at a time, once per quarter, so we could stay under the radar. He laughed and when done with the paperwork he said he would try not to cut himself. We shook hands, I made my flight, and thus was the fate of a 'knife' I literally never used. Long live the Queen.

 

[Dr Prepper]

Stun gun flashlights? Shocking!

stun gun fleshlight for the jerk offs called "news" now a days. that would be shocking. im sure they would "form ranks" in circle REAL fast at the sight of those latex summer sausages.

 

[Mathias]

Grandma lives with us now.
Great lady , but generational differences are present.
TV locked on channel 4 , heater on °79.
Lots of cookies and boxes of Kleenex around.

You say that like its a bad thing....heh, heh.

 

[Nick Burkhardt]

 

[Member 52301]

@Catherine1

Amazon.com : Hussar 618 Stun Gun for Self-Defense, Rechargeable with LED Flashlight, Powerful 1.60 µC Charge with Safety Switch, and Belt Holster : Sports & Outdoors

Okay and thanks for the information.

So it is like a taser/tazer with a flashlight.

Take care.

Cate

 

[revjen45]

1) "All about the ratings, not about unbiased information."
Ratings and pushing the Woke Agenda.

2) My wife's mother lived with us for a while. I still can't stand Wheel of Fortune.

3) " Why are you watching the news? That's your first problem. If you came here and said "I'm about to drop an engine block on my toe, I'll let you know how much my toe hurts in a bit" that would be the same thing."
I have stopped watching the Legacy Media news (exception for the weather.) because it just pi$$es me off AND at least 80% of the content is just agenda driven lies. A visit to the Bongino Report for a quick summation is adequate.

4) "Never forget the time I got detained at Heathrow while LEAVING the UK..."
My fave was the one in which Australian immigration authorities threw a raw sewage hemmorage over a Wrist Rocket in the possessions of a lady moving there.

5) This level of absurdity is inherent to the Leftie Weltanschauung. Ya can't just make it up.
In 1992 we moved to Everett from from Long Beach, DPRK. As distasteful as I find the urban environment in general, I thought that Seattle was actually pretty cool for a city. Now dropping a deuce on the sidewalk, random attacks by raving derelicts, and rampant affray are de rigueur in The Emerald City.
Can anyone explain to me how this is an improvement?

 

[Labradorian]

You say that like its a bad thing....heh, heh.

We took our adopted grandmother along on a 2 week road trip once. It actually worked out super slick too, my wife and her speak a language I know about 12 words in, so I didn't have to even act like I was ever paying attention to them. She was our built in babysitter too.

 

[American123]

I will say a nice, long blast of hot sauce in a guy's face is a great starting point, and can stop a douche nozzle in his/her tracks. That being said, I carry hot sauce "in addition" to my little friend, not in place of.

Side note - I have one of those stun gun flashlights in my truck as well...you know, so I can see in the dark...and just pushing the button and causing an arc flash is pretty intimidating. Its got inch long sharp prongs, creates a very loud crackle and an intense flash of the arc. I'm guessing it would also a be pretty dang good deterrent. Nobody wants to do the 60 cycle shuffle.

Just for reference - stun guns don't work on everyone so don't rely on it if you are in a situation and you deploy it. I can speak from personal experience.

 

[Mikej]

stun gun fleshlight for the jerk offs called "news" now a days. that would be shocking. im sure they would "form ranks" in circle REAL fast at the sight of those latex summer sausages.

DUDE! Your avatar is Da-Bomb man!

 

[v0lcom13sn0w]

I'll be yelling at the TV in a few minutes
Komo news is coming back with a segment on "self defense " in Seattle.
Rape whistles, oc ,those stupid gas station stun gun flashlights.

Pile in with me and ridicule the bastion of stupidity know as the emerald city.

pretty soon people will be conceal carrying pointed rocks

 

[Bat-S-Crazy]

Hmm, what's next? KOMO suggests spitting in their general direction as a shot across a perps bow...hey it works for the French and Seattle is not far from that mentality..

 

[Capn Jack]

I will say a nice, long blast of hot sauce in a guy's face is a great starting point, and can stop a douche nozzle in his/her tracks. That being said, I carry hot sauce "in addition" to my little friend, not in place of.

Side note - I have one of those stun gun flashlights in my truck as well...you know, so I can see in the dark...and just pushing the button and causing an arc flash is pretty intimidating. Its got inch long sharp prongs, creates a very loud crackle and an intense flash of the arc. I'm guessing it would also a be pretty dang good deterrent. Nobody wants to do the 60 cycle shuffle.

Problem is, when they saw that, "Snap Crackle & Pop", most would just shoot you..

 

[Knobgoblin]

Hmm, what's next? KOMO suggests spitting in their general direction as a shot across a perps bow...hey it works for the French and Seattle is not far from that mentality..

 

[Dr Prepper]

DUDE! Your avatar is Da-Bomb man!

Thanks man.
The face there on lefty just crack me the f up.
I cant figure out if hes a right handed or left handed batter.
I got all sorts of good'n's saved on my laptop. Been using it more lately. Theres plenty more to come.
Every now and then i hop on there and just laugh my bubblegum off. Remembering all the stuff i got. Lol.

 

[Dr Prepper]

"Hmm, what's next? KOMO suggests spitting in their general direction as a shot across a perps bow...hey it works for the French and Seattle is not far from that mentality.."

Answer:
Keep a nice 8oz nalgene bottle of hydrochloric acid on you at all times. That always worked for the muslims.
Oh wait are we not supposed to talk about that?

 

[Dr Prepper]

Lye also works, aim for the eyes!
Keep some baking soda on hand for neutralizing.
Who knows your former assailant may become your first customer.
First law of economics: supply and demand.

 

[Deerhurst]

Never forget the time I got detained at Heathrow while LEAVING the UK for having one of these in my large passport travel wallet after being there for 10 days.

Credit Card Knife

Lots of questions:

1. Where did I get it? (From a website a long, long time ago, in a land far, far away, on a whimsy, whimy, whim...I blame late night internet surfing...)
2. How come I didn't declare it on the way in? (Uh, um, forgot it was there, not much of a knife after all, seriously...)
3. How did I get it past security on the way into Her Majesty's Kingdom? (Uhmmm, scanners at SeaTac International (We're-World-Class-after-all) Airport didn't care, and in America, this isn't really a knife...)
4. Had I brandished it or used it while in the UK? (Ok, no, remember that part where I said I forgot about it...?)
5. We have to file a report, I hope you don't miss your flight. (Yeah, me too, I guess...this is comically fun...)
6. We have to confiscate it. (Sure, ok, you save me the trouble of throwing it away so I don't alarm a flight crew by some weird mistake of my travel wallet falling open...)

The cop was actually pretty cool, almost seemed embarrassed and said it was a formality and I'd go on record in the event I tried to do something similar in the future, that way they could see a pattern. I jokingly told him I was part of a credit card knife smuggling ring and our specialty was one knife at a time, once per quarter, so we could stay under the radar. He laughed and when done with the paperwork he said he would try not to cut himself. We shook hands, I made my flight, and thus was the fate of a 'knife' I literally never used. Long live the Queen.

That is gold!

Reminds me of the trumphant TSA lady in Redmond that found my can opener multi tool in my wallet. She was standing there like King Arthur pulling the sword from the stone. I told her that if I could take over an airplane with a can opener I've put in the work and deserve it. She didn't find it as funny as some of the other TSA people there did.