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how media would report it today

Discussion in 'General Firearm Discussion' started by Just Jim, Apr 20, 2010.

  1. Just Jim

    Just Jim Well-Known Member

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    Thought you guys would have fun with this. I borrowed it from another site.


    BOSTON, April 19

    - National Guard units seeking to confiscate a cache of recently banned assault
    weapons were ambushed on April 19th by elements
    of a para-military extremist faction. Military
    and law enforcement sources estimated that 72
    were killed and more than 20 injured before
    government forces were compelled to withdraw.

    Speaking after the clash, Massachusetts Governor
    Thomas Gage declared that the extremist faction,
    which was made up of local citizens, has links to
    the radical right-wing tax protest movement. Gage
    blamed the extremists for recent incidents of
    vandalism directed against internal revenue

    The governor, who described the group's
    organizers as "criminals," issued an executive
    order authorizing the summary arrest of any
    individual who has interfered with the
    government's efforts to secure law and order.

    The military raid on the extremist arsenal
    followed wide-spread refusal by the local
    citizenry to turn over recently outlawed assault
    weapons. Gage issued a ban on military-style
    assault weapons and ammunition earlier in the
    week. This decision followed a meeting in early
    April between government and military leaders at
    which the governor authorized the forcible
    confiscation of illegal arms. One government
    official, speaking on condition of anonymity,
    pointed out that "none of these people would have
    been killed had the extremists obeyed the law and
    turned their weapons over voluntarily."

    "Government troops initially succeeded in
    confiscating a large supply of outlawed weapons
    and ammunition. However, troops attempting to
    seize arms and ammunition in Lexington met with
    resistance from heavily-armed extremists who had
    been tipped off regarding the government's plans.

    During a tense standoff in Lexington's town park,
    National Guard Colonel Francis Smith, commander
    of the government operation, ordered the armed
    group to surrender and return to their homes. The
    impasse was broken by a single shot, which was
    reportedly fired by one of the right-wing
    extremists. Eight civilians were killed in the
    ensuing exchange.

    Ironically, the local citizenry blamed government
    forces rather than the extremists for the
    civilian deaths. Before order could be restored,
    armed citizens from surrounding areas had
    descended upon the guard units. Colonel Smith,
    finding his forces overmatched by the armed mob,
    ordered a retreat.

    Governor Gage has called upon citizens to support
    the state/national joint task force in its effort
    to restore law and order. The governor has also
    demanded the surrender of those responsible for
    planning and leading the attack against the
    government troops. Samuel Adams, Paul Revere, and
    John Hancock, who have been identified as
    "ringleaders" of the extremist faction, remain at
  2. Left Coast Avenger1

    Left Coast Avenger1 Oregon City Member

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    This is a good one! It would be even funnier if it was not true!
  3. bugeye

    bugeye Oregon Well-Known Member

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    That is amazing, so well written. I tried to find out who the author was on the net but couldn't. Apparently it has been around for a long time but can't be too long as the tone of it is just perfect.
  4. Sawdust

    Sawdust Bull Mountain(Tigard), OR Gold Supporter Gold Supporter

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    That's about it. Full media spin.
  5. Ding

    Ding Lighter Side of Oz Active Member

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    They have a separate executive and judges order for George Washington for an overdue pair of books he took out in 1786.The over due books are valued at over 300,000 dollars.He has kept the books to finance his revolution.These are hard and volatile times.
  6. Searcher451

    Searcher451 Oregon Member

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    I disagree and find it to be a good attempt at stereotyping, a poor attempt at humor. All media are not the same, just as all members of a family are not the same. We have had posts on this forum indicating that a media report, either on TV or in a newspaper or a magazine, got the facts right and did a good job with the story. Heck, the NRA is a media conglomerate, producing magazines and a website and providing news and information on gun ownership and safety and legislation and concerns.

    In my view, lumping all media into the same category is the same as some media members lumping all of us into the same broad swath of gun-totin', gun-happy, quick-to-shoot yahoos. No question that some folks in the media are bad apples; there's also no question that some gun-owners are bad apples as well. But the whole barrel isn't contaminated in either case.
  7. Just Jim

    Just Jim Well-Known Member

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    Paint them with a broad brush and they may work hard to prove you wrong. Most media has alot to answer for as over 90% of them are liberals with a liberal slant to their reporting.
  8. toobigtofail

    toobigtofail PDX Member

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    I guess Kentucky Rifles were the "assault weapons" of the day.
  9. Artilleryman

    Artilleryman Originally from the central midwest but have reloc Active Member

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    ...any type of weapon targeted by slander from the bedwetting gun ban crowd is the "assault weapon" of the day, or nearly as frequently they're "high powered, unregistered assault weapons" (usually referring to civillian legal & semi only AR's, Ak's, etc.)...their philosophy must be: if you can't prove your point with facts, sensationalized misinformation is the next step.