If you sprinkle while you tinkle, be a sweetie and wipe the seatie.

[NeoBlackdog]

Stand a little closer, Son, that ain't no Winchester ya got there!

 

[Howard1955]

Welcome aboard!

 

[Wombat of Doom]

Hi. This bit of advice used to hang on a sign right above the toilet in my grandmas house. That's all I gotta say about that. Thanks for having me.

my grandma had that above her toilet. Didn't help that she had all sons and those sons produced around 11 other sons. She also had a "stand close, it's shorter than you think" sign over the commode.

 

[Howard1955]

The lack of accuracy, of course is a guy thing. Growing up, I had to listen to one of my grandmothers mention a brother-in-law whom she claimed peed on the floor on purpose just to make his sister clean it up. As a little boy, this was amazing to me. As an adult, I'm more inclined to think it was carelessness. My own missus has remarked about how her brother was a careless one. I've always been pretty careful and if an accident occurred, I'd clean it up. I'd feel too guilty otherwise.

Wall urinals are very common in public places. Not so common in residential homes. Yet I've always thought it would be a nice little luxury to have one. Yeah, I know, someone here will tell us they have one. Like those who have bidets. But I'll bet a home wall mount urinal is rather unusual.

These days, in commercial construction, wall mount urinals are just that, simply clamped to a wall. In days gone by or in older buildings, do you remember the full length urinals that had the lower portion set into the floor? Tiled all around the drain area? I'm sure much more expensive to plumb and do the concrete work around the base. It's always a treat for me to walk into an older men's room and see the full length fixtures. Circa the 1960's, there was a kind of intermediate wall mount design where the drain area was scooped way out to catch errant streams and more of the drips. But these are not often seen now.

Many years ago, one of the Ford dealers my dad worked at had an interesting men's room. It had a stainless steel gang basin and a long, gang urinal. Both were mounted at about the same height from the floor. My dad said any number of times he'd go into the men's room and see a confused person peeing into the sink by accident. Once again, as a lad, I thought this was hugely funny.

One more interesting bathroom fixture. The circular gang sink, some with the foot pedal faucet control. They have these in one of the buildings at the Puyallup fairgrounds. One time I went in there and saw a guy whizzing into one of these.

Years ago, the public schools in southeast Texas had those long gang urinals, and the circular sinks with a foot pedal control. I can smell it now.

 

[Wombat of Doom]

Years ago, the public schools in southeast Texas had those long gang urinals, and the circular sinks with a foot pedal control. I can smell it now.

And a psych ward I worked at installed hand rails that looked like these. You can guess what happened.

 

[Hawaiian]

After we first got married, wife asked, "could you please put the toilet seat down after you go". I replied, "sure, and could you please put it up for me after you go".
She never asked again.

 

[Certaindeaf]

This is why I urinate in the bathtub.








not really

 

[Hooyah DeepSea]

Which brings up the question; why is peeing in the shower such an issue with some people?

 

[x2ndxall]

Which brings up the question; why is peeing in the shower such an issue with some people?

Math is hard. Thinking in general is hard.
I guess they don't know you're rinsing brown lather from betwixt your cheeks in the shower.

 

[x2ndxall]

After we first got married, wife asked, "could you please put the toilet seat down after you go". I replied, "sure, and could you please put it up for me after you go".
She never asked again.

I've asked the same, to make the point. But I really don't want her sit on the bowl in the middle of the night. I like her clean. So, I always put the seat down.

 

[Mikej]

After we first got married, wife asked, "could you please put the toilet seat down after you go". I replied, "sure, and could you please put it up for me after you go".
She never asked again.

I've asked the same, to make the point. But I really don't want her sit on the bowl in the middle of the night. I like her clean. So, I always put the seat down.

I consider it a common courtesy for the wife. So I close both. And then we got the house with TWO bathrooms!

 

[fredball]

Welcome Aboard

 

[Mono1]

I practice writing my name in case we get a rare snowfall that sticks. You suckers all missed out last week! Strangely my neighbors were less than impressed by having my name in yellow letters on their front yards, but I guess there is no accounting for taste.

That would require a pretty extended stream. You must be younger than me.

 

[3MTA3]

That would require a pretty extended stream. You must be younger than me.

Naw, when I was growing up on our family vacations Dad would only stop when our 59 Ford needed gas. Historical markers were memorized a few words at a time as we passed them each year on out way to Bozeman and back. That was when it was 750 miles and the Lolo pass was the only option. We left at 4AM and got to Grandma's well after dark.

As a result I have superhuman bladder capacity. It has served me well over the years, especially in waiting out others in meetings where I got concessions to others could leave and hit the head.

Later in life I used to tease my Dad as I drove him and Mom on vacations, making like I was going to pass the rest areas each time we saw the sign. Not wanting to clean my car seats I always stopped anyway.

Oddly, Marvel refused to create a super hero based on my telent, but apparently "The Yellow Avenger" had racist connotations, so they politely told me to F**k Off.

Next time to snows I plan on simply writing "Zorro" on their lawns. I'm pretty sure they won't suspect me.

 

[GrayGoose]

One hole. Two damn streams! Neither of which makes it into the bowl, hitting the floor instead. Pisses me off every time.

 

[Mono1]

As a result I have superhuman bladder capacity.

 

[ditchtiger]

At my uncle's home,
"Men, stand close, it's shorter than you think."
" Ladies, please remain seated during the entire performance"

 

[Spitpatch]

At the Stockman's Bar in Jordan, Montana 50 years ago. seen just above the gang-urinal:

"If you can piss above this line, the Jordan Fire Department needs YOU!"

 

[Certaindeaf]

At my uncle's home,
"Men, stand close, it's shorter than you think."
" Ladies, please remain seated during the entire performance"

I heard women's public bathrooms are a crime scene as they all hover and pray to the jesus they don't spray the walls too bad.

 

[Hooyah DeepSea]

If you care to look at the records, all of the 'piss for distance' winners are women. That may be something to pay attention to.