Dads, Grand Dads, It's Time To Break The Cycle

[3MTA3]

OK, let's face it. One of the worst things about being married is your wife picking out your clothes and dressing you like you are some sort of Ken doll. Admit it, you hate this as much as I do. Yesterday evening when I spent H O U R S (OK, it was only fifteen minutes, but it was excruciating) being Ken while she had me try on this and that like I can't dress myself. Admittedly, I do just grab a random pair of pants and a random T shirt, but my socks do occasionally match so she claims to be having nightmares about me showing up at her Niece's wedding in shorts and a wife beater. OK, I did laugh nervously and tell her it was just a joke. Anyway, all you married guys know the drill.

While I was thinking about all the other things I'd rather be doing while playing Ken I had an epiphany! The Ken doll analogy is very accurate, and the problem is unwittingly created when we, as parents, give our daughters Barbie and Ken dolls to play with. Basically, we are training women at an early age to think they have the right and even obligation to dress their man. Not only that, the expectation has been set that they need to turn us into effeminate pretty buys which explains all the pink shirts she keeps buying me that I "accidentally" stain with food, motor oil, or paint.

The problem is bigger than you think. Take a close look at Ken and it's immediately obvious that his future likely involves hormones and fake boobs along with a name change to Kendra or at the very least a closet full of drag queen costumes. We are setting our daughters up for eventual divorce and possibly Monkey Pox. Then there is having to explain to her kids why daddy now wears a dress and is marrying Tommi who looks suspiciously like Dad's best friend Tom and has five o'clock shadow.




The Solution is easy once we put this in perspective. Barbie needs a real man. Enter GI Joe. Not only is GI Joe taller than Ken as much as Ken is to Barbie, he is also strong enough to open a jar of pickles, where Ken has to use one of those lid wrench things. GI Joe can also fix things round the house without calling an expensive professional or his Dad to replace a light switch cover or plunge a clogged toilet like Ken.

Ken is currently working part time as an assistant barista at Starbucks. Good thing Barbie has a full time job even though she was forced to sell her pink Corvette and work all the overtime she can to help make ends meet while Ken finds himself or whatever. Joe, on the other hand, not only has a full time job, he has a career that will provide a decent lifestyle and eventual retirement. Joe is in it for the long haul.

At Barbie's annual Christmas party none of Barbie's co workers or bosses will even dare to ask her for a dance with Joe around, especially after he shop talked with them about all the enemies he has killed bare handed. Ken, on the other hand would meekly look away when Barbie and her boss would dance inappropriately and then disappear for a half hour. Truth is Ken would likely be engaged in an animated conversation with Barbie's co worker Rory.

Oh, and Joe dresses himself, thank you very much, which is the whole freaking point.

The best part about Joe is that he comes with guns, which further prepares her to accept the fact that any man worth having will have guns and it's nonaherdambusiness.



Implementing The Solution not only breaks the cycle but makes you look great as well. Simply give your daughters or grand daughters one or more GI Joes to give Ken some competition he has no chance of winning. If she has a brother make it clear that Joe's clothes are ONLY to be adjusted by that brother. Whenever you have a chance, strip Ken and dress him with some of Barbie's clothes to drive the point home. Also, make sure to periodically give her weapons packs to accessorize Joe so she will realize it's completely normal for her future husband to frequently buy more guns.

You may be too late to save yourself or even your sons, but you owe it to future generations to break the "dress my husband" entitlement all women seem to have.

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[Tinman357]

Ah, the bliss of the single life.

 

[Member 34319]

Don't drink and post.

 

[pharmseller]

Cut and paste is strong.

 

[Member 52301]

OK, let's face it. One of the worst things about being married is your wife picking out your clothes and dressing you like you are some sort of Ken doll. Admit it, you hate this as much as I do. Yesterday evening when I spent H O U R S (OK, it was only fifteen minutes, but it was excruciating) being Ken while she had me try on this and that like I can't dress myself. Admittedly, I do just grab a random pair of pants and a random T shirt, but my socks do occasionally match so she claims to be having nightmares about me showing up at her Niece's wedding in shorts and a wife beater. OK, I did laugh nervously and tell her it was just a joke. Anyway, all you married guys know the drill.

While I was thinking about all the other things I'd rather be doing while playing Ken I had an epiphany! The Ken doll analogy is very accurate, and the problem starts when we, as parents, unwittingly create by giving our daughters Barbie and Ken dolls to play with. Basically, we are training women at an early age to think they have the right and even obligation to dress their man. Not only that, the expectation has been set that they need to turn us into effeminate pretty buys which explains all the pink shirts she keeps buying me that I "accidentally" stain with food, motor oil, or paint.

The problem is bigger than you think. Take a close look at Ken and it's immediately obvious that his future likely involves hormones and fake boobs along with a name change to Kendra or at the very least a closet full of drag queen costumes. We are setting our daughters up for eventual divorce and possibly Monkey Pox. Then there is having to explain to her kids why daddy now wears a dress and is marrying Tommi who looks suspiciously like Dad's best friend Tom and has five o'clock shadow.


View attachment 1265664

The Solution is easy once we put this in perspective. Barbie needs a real man. Enter GI Joe. Not only is GI Joe taller than Ken as much as Ken is to Barbie, he is also strong enough to open a jar of pickles, where Ken has to use one of those lid wrench things. GI Joe can also fix things round the house without calling an expensive professional or his Dad to replace a light switch cover or plunge a clogged toilet like Ken.

Ken is currently working part time as an assistant barista at Starbucks. Good thing Barbie has a full time job even though she was forced to sell her pink Corvette and work all the overtime she can to help make ends meet while Ken finds himself or whatever. Joe, on the other hand, not only has a full time job, he has a career that will provide a decent lifestyle and eventual retirement. Joe is in it for the long haul.

At Barbie's annual Christmas party none of Barbie's co workers or bosses will even dare to ask her for a dance with Joe around, especially after he shop talked with them about all the enemies he has killed bare handed. Ken, on the other hand would meekly look away when Barbie and her boss would dance inappropriately and then disappear for a half hour. Truth is Ken would likely be engaged in an animated conversation with Barbie's co worker Rory.

Oh, and Joe dresses himself, thank you very much, which is the whole freaking point.

The best part about Joe is that he comes with guns, which further prepares her to accept the fact that any man worth having will have guns and it's nonaherdambusiness.

View attachment 1265666

Implementing The Solution not only breaks the cycle but makes you look great as well. Simply give your daughters or grand daughters one or more GI Joes to give Ken some competition he has no chance of winning. If she has a brother make it clear that Joe's clothes are ONLY to be adjusted by that brother. Whenever you have a chance, strip Ken and dress him with some of Barbie's clothes to drive the point home. Also, make sure to periodically give her weapons packs to accessorize Joe so she will realize it's completely normal for her future husband to frequently buy more guns.

You may be too late to save yourself or even your sons, but you owe it to future generations to break the "dress my husband" entitlement all women seem to have.

What does this mean when you say showing up in shorts and a wife beater? What is a wife beater when it comes to CLOTHING? I have never heard of that term when it comes to clothing.

Quote by you:

"OK, let's face it. One of the worst things about being married is your wife picking out your clothes and dressing you like you are some sort of Ken doll. Admit it, you hate this as much as I do. Yesterday evening when I spent H O U R S (OK, it was only fifteen minutes, but it was excruciating) being Ken while she had me try on this and that like I can't dress myself. Admittedly, I do just grab a random pair of pants and a random T shirt, but my socks do occasionally match so she claims to be having nightmares about me showing up at her Niece's wedding in shorts and a wife beater. OK, I did laugh nervously and tell her it was just a joke. Anyway, all you married guys know the drill."

Old Lady Cate

 

[Member 52301]

I don't dress my husband. He picks out his own clothing - usually jeans and a nice blue shirt.

He donated all of his suits and every single tie that he NO longer had to keep or wear a long time ago too. Tons of other clothing went to the shelter with shoes/boots and some cold weather clothing. He did not have to wear a suit that often too.

I have bought a few shirts, nice slippers and a good leather belt for him as gifts. That was a long time ago.
Usually, he gets GUN/ammunition/reloading STUFF from me. Sometimes hunting or fishing gear or a book or a knife.

I recently bought his 'early' Christmas gift on sale. Very specific factory loaded .380 acp ammunition since he does not plan to reload for that Glock pistol.

I didn't dress my late husband. He chose what he wanted to wear. He did get some clothing gifts from me in over 30 years of marriage. He usually stuck with jeans, a nice blue shirt, some shorts for warm weather and swim/boat clothing/gear. He did not have to wear a suit that often. He did have USN and Air NG Fighter Wing uniforms plus clothing for his NON .gov job.

I was NEVER into Barbie or Ken dolls and toys. I never wanted them or received them for gifts.

Cate

 

[3MTA3]

What does this mean when you say showing up in shorts and a wife beater? What is a wife beater when it comes to CLOTHING? I have never heard of that term when it comes to clothing.

A "wife beater" is another term for a tank top, like Nicholas Cage is sporting here. They look as bad on a guy with a dad bod and beyond as they look great on a guy who is in shape. I have a incredibly advanced dad bod so should not be allowed to wear one even when it's pitch black and everyone is wearing blindfolds..

 

[3MTA3]

I don't dress my husband. He picks out his own clothing - usually jeans and a nice blue shirt.

He donated all of his suits and every single tie that he NO longer had to keep or wear a long time ago too. Tons of other clothing went to the shelter with shoes/boots and some cold weather clothing. He did not have to wear a suit that often too.

I have bought a few shirts, nice slippers and a good leather belt for him as gifts. That was a long time ago.
Usually, he gets GUN/ammunition/reloading STUFF from me. Sometimes hunting or fishing gear or a book or a knife.

I recently bought his 'early' Christmas gift on sale. Very specific factory loaded .380 acp ammunition since he does not plan to reload for that Glock pistol.

I didn't dress my late husband. He chose what he wanted to wear. He did get some clothing gifts from me in over 30 years of marriage. He usually stuck with jeans, a nice blue shirt, some shorts for warm weather and swim/boat clothing/gear. He did not have to wear a suit that often. He did have USN and Air NG Fighter Wing uniforms plus clothing for his NON .gov job.

I was NEVER into Barbie or Ken dolls and toys. I never wanted them or received them for gifts.

Cate

Just having a bit of fun, so please don't take any of it seriously. To a certain extent most of us guys have to deal with our significant others taking a portion of control over our wardrobes. Reality is that women and men have different dress codes in many situations. A man's business suit in the US has it's own cut that signifies trustworthiness and dependability, where as an Italian suit is cut with a waist and is closer to a suit an American might have for a formal night out short of black tie. A woman will typically see the Italian cut as preferable even for business because it's closer to her dress code, but in business here such a suit would be like having douchebag tattooed on your forehead.

I have to say you are pretty unique with your aversion to Barbie as a girl. I'm part of a very large family and I don't recall a single niece, great niece, etc.., that didn't go bonkers over Barbie. Usually Uncle 3M was even told which specific Barbie or outfit. Little girls tend to know as much about Barbie as little boys know about baseball.

 

[joshkk]

I wish Dads and Grand-dads would break the cycles of homophobia, glorification of machismo/militarization, irrational fears of emasculation, patriarchal gender dynamics, and poor communication skills demonstrated in this original post.

What's "less manly": wearing a pink shirt your wife bought you or not being able to directly communicate and tell her "Honey, please don't buy me any more pink shirts because I don't want them" and passive-aggressively staining them to get out of it.

You can smack-talk men who wear Italian-cut suits but if your wife can't trust you to know how to dress appropriately for a wedding, you hardly seem like a good arbiter of fashion.

 

[3MTA3]

I wish Dads and Grand-dads would break the cycles of homophobia, glorification of machismo/militarization, irrational fears of emasculation, patriarchal gender dynamics, and poor communication skills demonstrated in this original post.

What's "less manly": wearing a pink shirt your wife bought you or not being able to directly communicate and tell her "Honey, please don't buy me any more pink shirts because I don't want them" and passive-aggressively staining them to get out of it.

You can smack-talk men who wear Italian-cut suits but if your wife can't trust you to know how to dress appropriately for a wedding, you hardly seem like a good arbiter of fashion.

But at least I'm fun at parties and can laugh at my own expense. Today's fun dictionary words are humor and satire. Today's movie quote is "Lighten up, Francis."

 

[joshkk]

But at least I'm fun at parties and can laugh at my own expense. Today's fun dictionary words are humor and satire.

Buddy, I carry a red clown nose in my pocket every day as part of my EDC, I'm well familiar with those words.

 

[Barefootdog]

I've been out of the loop for a while so you folks have to help me out.....

What the heck happened to Barbies Ta Tas?
She used to be really built...

It's not right...It's just not right.

And yah...Kenny looks.....a bit delicate.
Giddy as a sissy in Boys Town.

 

[Mikej]

But at least I'm fun at parties and can laugh at my own expense. Today's fun dictionary words are humor and satire. Today's movie quote is "Lighten up, Francis!"

I think I love you man.

I've been out of the loop for a while so you folks have to help me out.....

What the heck happened to Barbies Ta Tas?
She used to be really built...

It's not right...It's just not right.

And yah...Kenny looks.....a bit delicate.
Giddy as a sissy in Boys Town.

Oh, I'm sure someone will find that offensive.

And for the record. I haven't played with a Barbie doll since like, fourth grade. No wait, those were "Troll dolls".

 

[3MTA3]

And for the record. I haven't played with a Barbie doll since like, fourth grade. No wait, those were "Troll dolls".

My GI Joe played with a Barbie doll frequently and dressing her up was not one of their activities...

 

[Flopsweat]

Buddy, I carry a red clown nose in my pocket every day as part of my EDC, I'm well familiar with those words.

So that's what you were fondling. That's a relief. You really shouldn't look people directly in the eye when you do that.

 

[joshkk]

So that's what you were fondling. That's a relief. You really shouldn't look people directly in the eye when you do that.

"Is that a clown nose in my pocket or am I just happy to see you?"

 

[Member 52301]

Just having a bit of fun, so please don't take any of it seriously. To a certain extent most of us guys have to deal with our significant others taking a portion of control over our wardrobes. Reality is that women and men have different dress codes in many situations. A man's business suit in the US has it's own cut that signifies trustworthiness and dependability, where as an Italian suit is cut with a waist and is closer to a suit an American might have for a formal night out short of black tie. A woman will typically see the Italian cut as preferable even for business because it's closer to her dress code, but in business here such a suit would be like having douchebag tattooed on your forehead.

I have to say you are pretty unique with your aversion to Barbie as a girl. I'm part of a very large family and I don't recall a single niece, great niece, etc.., that didn't go bonkers over Barbie. Usually Uncle 3M was even told which specific Barbie or outfit. Little girls tend to know as much about Barbie as little boys know about baseball.

No problem. I was just answering the post.

I think that it is a funny original post and the other replies made me laugh out loud and smile!

My late Mom used to clothes shop once a year with my late Dad for his yearly new suit. HE wanted her to come with him. It was a date that they did every year.

HE was very picky about his suits, his white shirts - he only liked 2 types/brands, his ties, his special socks/shoes, etc.

He was kind of picky about his casual clothes just as he was when it came to his fishing poles.

Since he was so specific - he was easy to buy gifts for including his shaving mug, shaving soap, shaving bristle brush, old fashioned razor and blades, etc.

And he liked music and he loved to read a LOT. He loved to walk/hike and fish. He liked to swim too. He was very easy to shop for all of his life. He worked 6 days a week until he retired too.

He was a chef and his white uniform and hat had to be clean, spotless, starched and ironed. Work took care of that.

He was a shepherd in his 'old country' on his Dad's land. Legal immigrant via Ellis Island. He worked and lived in several countries including France before he hit America's shores. He became an American citizen BEFORE he met my late Mom in who was in medicine.

He said that even when he was poorer and trying to better himself, he believed that you had to be clean, wear clean and ironed clothing, work hard and SMART. They did not have permanent press clothing way back when and even with that invention - ironing HELPS. LOL

Cate

 

[Member 52301]

My GI Joe played with a Barbie doll frequently and dressing her up was not one of their activities...

LOL

I just about spit out my hot tea laughing here.

You guys are on a roll!

Old Lady Cate

 

[Member 52301]

I've been out of the loop for a while so you folks have to help me out.....

What the heck happened to Barbies Ta Tas?
She used to be really built...

It's not right...It's just not right.

And yah...Kenny looks.....a bit delicate.
Giddy as a sissy in Boys Town.

Maybe she had surgery to reduce them in the factory or the NEW MADISON AD people thought that she was stacked or built like a brick house and it would not FIT into today's society.

By the way, that STACKED/BUILT sentence was considered to be a compliment years ago among 'men' talking about some movie stars and I have NO clue what it is now to some people.

I did NOT find ta tas offensive. I think that your post is FUNNY!

I had a Raggedy Ann doll when I was a kid - she did not need a bra. My teddy bear was a male.

Cate

 

[3MTA3]

No problem. I was just answering the post.

I think that it is a funny original post and the other replies made me laugh out loud and smile!

My late Mom used to clothes shop once a year with my late Dad for his yearly new suit. HE wanted her to come with him. It was a date that they did every year.

HE was very picky about his suits, his white shirts - he only liked 2 types/brands, his ties, his special socks/shoes, etc.

He was kind of picky about his casual clothes just as he was when it came to his fishing poles.

Since he was so specific - he was easy to buy gifts for including his shaving mug, shaving soap, shaving bristle brush, old fashioned razor and blades, etc.

And he liked music and he loved to read a LOT. He loved to walk/hike and fish. He liked to swim too. He was very easy to shop for all of his life. He worked 6 days a week until he retired too.

He was a chef and his white uniform and hat had to be clean, spotless, starched and ironed. Work took care of that.

He was a shepherd in his 'old country' on his Dad's land. Legal immigrant via Ellis Island. He worked and lived in several countries including France before he hit America's shores. He became an American citizen BEFORE he met my late Mom in who was in medicine.

He said that even when he was poorer and trying to better himself, he believed that you had to be clean, wear clean and ironed clothing, work hard and SMART. They did not have permanent press clothing way back when and even with that invention - ironing HELPS. LOL

Cate

When I was a single guy I used to ask coincidentally single girls to help me shop for clothes. It wasn't clothes I was really shopping for, but I did wind up with a pretty decent wardrobe as a by product.