Son or Daughter Enlistment

[Jasonanddeonna]

The Memorial Day thread got me thinking about those who enlisted and died serving their country. Again, a heartfelt thank you to those who died while serving and to family and friends. I shared some about my grandfathers.

My father, an only child, and I were not able to serve due to medical reasons.

My youngest, who I have posted about before, graduates high school on 6/11/22. He leaves for Fort Benning for Basic Training and Airborn on 7/25/22. I am so proud of him and at the same time, feeling like my heart is being torn watching him leave the nest far too soon. Having no experience in military life, I do not know what to expect, just that I want to support him and for him to be as safe as possible (physically and mentally) during his time.

For those that have served or have children who have/are, what would you have wanted from your parents or want them to know during your enlistment? What support did or would you have wanted?

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[Xaevian]

I had no support. My parents were too wrapped up in their own problems and their divorce. No one came to my OSUT graduation or my unit family day.

Do the opposite of that.

 

[Xaevian]

After that, I was stationed in Germany during Desert Shield and Desert Storm for three years. My parents never called or wrote me.

Also do the opposite of that.

 

[gryghin]

I'm 2nd Gen Submariner. My parents attended my boot camp graduation. They knew what I was going through. We talked on the phone every other week and wrote on a regular basis, once a month.

Don't force too much communication.

Edit: this was after boot, while I was in service schools. When I hit the fleet things changed for obvious reasons. My kids went to college instead of military, I did the same for them... be there but not hovering.

Good luck.

 

[Tinman357]

Just be there. If he talks, listen. Don't advise, do not criticize, just listen. Tell him you're proud of him. Better yet, show him, quietly. In your mind, he is your boy, he always will be. Talk to him as a man, he is.

Let him know that you see him as a man. He's still young, still learning. He's going to have bad moments, make mistakes. We all did.

Just be there when he needs you. He's going to be scared, but he'll never let it show.

 

[Certaindeaf]

Send him a care package while he's in basic.. stuff like lip balm, bon bons, and magazines like New Woman are always a hit.





Lool

 

[oremike]

Just let him be him but be there for him. He won't be your little boy any longer but will always be your Son. Be proud of him and supportive. Be the home he wants to come back to when he gets leave.

 

[Andy54Hawken]

Letters , phone calls and care packages are always nice.

Quiet support and understanding is good also.

My dad , who was also a combat veteran...helped by doing the above after my combat tours.
Andy

 

[RicInOR]

He'll be sore, tired, tired of being yelled at, and risking his life.
My nephew, an All American, found a tree on one of his training jumps.

Send Mail - not packages - words of encouragement.

Between now and then encourage him to lift heavy things. What ever you might have - dog food to concrete - heavy Squats.

Encourage him to take photos of his new buddies.

All Americans to Afghanistan

My nephew, first row, second from our, the viewers, left

www.northwestfirearms.com

All Americans to Afghanistan

My nephew, first row, second from our, the viewers, left

www.northwestfirearms.com

 

[Jasonanddeonna]

Thank you all for your suggestions, I will definitely take them. All ideas and advice greatly appreciated.

 

[Jasonanddeonna]

Well, Monday approaches very fast now. He did his second graduation skydive last week, his last Crossfit on Friday with his class, last range practice this morning at The Bow Rack, and his last day working at my friend's ranch tomorrow. We had an early "Thanksgiving Dinner" for him today with family and friends in attendance to share the time with him. We plan to be in Portland for his swear in, pictures, and prayer as he begins his new adventure. Go with God, Gabriel, and may He protect you and your fellow recruits; dad is very proud and loves you always.

 

[Jasonanddeonna]

Mom, brother, and I had one last dinner with him Tuesday night and spent the last buy of time with him until their Instructionsl meeting at 2030. Up until this point, he has been confident about his decision to join, but the nerves came out last night. He is in Atlanta now with one other recruit waiting for the bus, but really struggling with fear and anxiety. We are letting him know this is normal, it's scary, and don't know what to expect. Lots of encouragement. Any advice to help calm him is greatly appreciated.

 

[Andy54Hawken]

Thousands of young men and women , have gone through this ...and made it through any fears or difficulties they have faced.
What he his thinking and feeling in "normal"...
What he his thinking and feeling is also part of his journey to become a soldier.
Andy

 

[Jasonanddeonna]

Thousands of young men and women , have gone through this ...and made it through any fears or difficulties they have faced.
What he his thinking and feeling in "normal"...
What he his thinking and feeling is also part of his journey to become a soldier.
Andy

Andy, we have passed your message to him; thank you! It's easy to know this after going through life experiences, but difficult for young people who do not have as much.

May I ask, and this is open for anyone, would it be unusual to see a recruit cry because of their fear/anxiety? To me, this might be a piece of feeling that and to help "get it out of my system."

 

[Andy54Hawken]

You are very welcome....

As far as crying goes...
Nothing wrong with that , as far as I can see
( Ex. Airborne , Ranger LRRP / LRSD with 4 combat tours here )
With that said...some folks will view that differently.....

Letting things "air out" ...seems better than letting them lie inside and fester , so to speak.

It's a big scary world...we learn to adapt to it...or we will have trouble...crying can be part of the coping of what is going on around you.
Everyone processes events and experiences at their own time and with their own needs.
As long as it ain't an out control blubbering ...then I wouldn't be overly worried.
Andy

 

[Xaevian]

Andy, we have passed your message to him; thank you! It's easy to know this after going through life experiences, but difficult for young people who do not have as much.

May I ask, and this is open for anyone, would it be unusual to see a recruit cry because of their fear/anxiety? To me, this might be a piece of feeling that and to help "get it out of my system."

Totally normal. Many may feel the same, but may not show it. The understanding that all the recruits are going through the same thing brings them close, and he will find help and understanding from them.

One thing the military teaches is that no one is in it alone. The experience may be tough, but not impossible, and working together to deal with issues and help each other will be key. Of course, I went through OSUT, which is more like 4 months of basic, but the concept is the same.

 

[Jasonanddeonna]

You are very welcome....

As far as crying goes...
Nothing wrong with that , as far as I can see
( Ex. Airborne , Ranger LRRP / LRSD with 4 combat tours here )
With that said...some folks will view that differently.....

Letting things "air out" ...seems better than letting them lie inside and fester , so to speak.

It's a big scary world...we learn to adapt to it...or we will have trouble...crying can be part of the coping of what is going on around you.
Everyone processes events and experiences at their own time and with their own needs.
As long as it ain't an out control blubbering ...then I wouldn't be overly worried.
Andy

My thoughts as well. We have told him if he feels like this, go use the restroom and take a few minutes. We are also having him focus on what he is looking forward to, new skills, stronger, and other goals. Also to focus on past accomplishments and overcoming obstacles. He'll get this, just a big step right now.

 

[Andy54Hawken]

My thoughts as well. We have told him if he feels like this, go use the restroom and take a few minutes. We are also having him focus on what he is looking forward to, new skills, stronger, and other goals. Also to focus on past accomplishments and overcoming obstacles. He'll get this, just a big step right now.

This sounds like good , solid advice...lucky son to y'all as parents.
Andy

 

[Jasonanddeonna]

Totally normal. Many may feel the same, but may not show it. The understanding that all the recruits are going through the same thing brings them close, and he will find help and understanding from them.

One thing the military teaches is that no one is in it alone. The experience may be tough, but not impossible, and working together to deal with issues and help each other will be key. Of course, I went through OSUT, which is more like 4 months of basic, but the concept is the same.

Thank you. Like with Andy's, it normalizes the experience with others and we hope he recognizes this. It definitely helps as you work with others to get through it.

 

[Jasonanddeonna]

Update: We have had one long call and a short call from him. Despite some anxiety and fear of the unknow, he is starting to settle in. He completed Processing yesterday and started Basic today. He is assigned to the 198th Brigade 2nd Battalion 54th Infantry Company A. Now the Red Phase begins. Prayers and hugs, Gabe, you will get through this.