How a Bean Becomes a Fart

[fredball]

How a Bean Becomes a Fart

Because I know you guys need this info

so sit back and enjoy the video G rated

Something most people do not know

Subject: How a Bean Becomes a Fart

See why the magical fruit really DOES make you toot

http://www.menshealth.com/health/how-bean-becomes-fart

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[Stomper]

Beans, beans, they're good for your heart. The more you eat the more you.....

 

[B5Ben]

...shart!

 

[Mikej]

Hmm, Good day I think, for a nice big pot of baked beans. Great Northern's cooked slowly, bacon and salt pork, with brown sugar, ketchup and molasses...Toss in some chopped onion and garlic and bake sooo slooow for about eight hours! Yep. Gettin' right on it!

Thanks for the idea Fred.

 

[Stomper]

Had me some homemade chuncky chili last night (for reals)... I'm LOCKED AND LOADED!!

 

[etrain16]

Hmmm, sounds like a good reminder to make up some ham bone soup. Navy beans, lima beans, butter beans, some seasoning and a big ham bone with meat still on it - all day in a slow cooker. Serve with some nice crusty bread and plenty of Beano . Good stuff on a cold winter night.

 

[Member 5605]

If you...

Soak dry beans and change the water they won't make you toot.

Store bought beans:
Drain and rinse.

Those complex sugars is what makes the problem.

There was this one time I made a bean soup and forgot to change the last soak water.

Lord have mercy. You could hear the gut from a mile away while the trains were rumbling through. I won't make that mistake again.

 

[45alive]

Its FUN to FART, about 15 seconds after I release a stink bomb my Wife will look puzzled. Then she will say ''Good God, did you just S%!T ?'' Depending on degrees of the stink factor, I will apologize for the mediocre FARTS and laugh at the FARTS that curl your nose hairs !

 

[PaulB47]

Back when I was in the military, there were a couple of drunk guys who were having a fart competition in the squad bay. This went on until one of them shat himself. "Fart proud", yes, but carefully.

 

[Stomper]

Its FUN to FART, about 15 seconds after I release a stink bomb my Wife will look puzzled. Then she will say ''Good God, did you just S%!T ?'' Depending on degrees of the stink factor, I will apologize for the mediocre FARTS and laugh at the FARTS that curl your nose hairs !

Don't get me started on doing the Dutch Oven on the wife. "They" don't call beds the "fart sack" for no good reason.

Back when I was in the military, there were a couple of drunk guys who were having a fart competition in the squad bay. This went on until one of them shat himself. "Fart proud", yes, but carefully.

Dude, I could make my entire platoon GAG, in an outdoor formation in the wind.... upwind of me. My squad leader would be pi$$ed, saying, "GD it.... that sheit fuggin lingers!" It took 12-14 seconds for it to escape BDU's, so you had to have your timing down.

 

[Oregonhunter5]

For all you that don't click on a link. Click on this one.

 

[Vaultman]

Boy did this thread get to the crapper really quick. (I guess it started in the general area).

 

[45alive]

Don't get me started on doing the Dutch Oven on the wife. "They" don't call beds the "fart sack" for no good reason.





Dude, I could make my entire platoon GAG, in an outdoor formation in the wind.... upwind of me. My squad leader would be pi$$ed, saying, "GD it.... that sheit fuggin lingers!" It took 12-14 seconds for it to escape BDU's, so you had to have your timing down.

''The Dutch Oven'' that's sadistic !

 

[45alive]

I got bored one day years ago and put FART in the YOU TUBE Search. I will say if those videos do not make you laugh, something is wrong. There is one guy on there that actually lights a fricken Candle with a FART FLAME Thrower out of his A$$ using a lighter to ignite the Methane gas !

 

[Stomper]

 

[45alive]

I Sheet You not Stomper .

 

[tac]

Look over on Goofy humor for a fart-related funny.

Just give me a coupla minutes to write it up, 'kay?

tac

 

[Oregonhunter5]

When I fart, it sounds like someone saying Hope and Change.

 

[eliduc]

Definition of an accident, a fart with a lump in it.