I lost another gun pal

[Alexx1401]

"Blood is thicker than water, but money is thicker than blood!" - Boss Hogg

I've seen and heard of this time and time again: one greedy sibling that maneuvers and schemes to take it all. I remember it happened to my parents when my grandfather passed away decades ago; one uncle figured out how to take the lion's share.

My dad swore and swore that it was never going to happen to his family. I never would have thought it would, either, but he passed several years ago, and it's even worse- a selfish sibling figured out how to take it all.

What this has taught me is that people are always more important than stuff. Rather than building property and wealth for the future, focus on building strong relationships. Everything my dad worked his lifetime to build up will eventually be frittered away and lost. What a waste.

There is "family" and then there is money.
Wife has 6 siblings. When her Mom got real ill her and ONE other sibling were the only ones who seemed to have any time to help. Her Father was 90 and was a full time care giver. Soon after her Mom went her Dad went down hill fast. Again her and one sibling were the only ones who seemed to have time to spend with him while he was in Hospice. After he was gone they all sure as hell wanted to know how much they were going to get though. They let them all go through the home and take whatever they wanted, sold the rest and then the home to divide up. His little dog? NONE of them wanted that. Few of them wanted to sell the damn thing.
Wife told them to pound sand, that we paid for the dog for him. So we ended up taking it. The best part is now that its all over no longer have to spend any time around the ones who had no time to help out.

 

[ZA_Survivalist]

There is "family" and then there is money.
Wife has 6 siblings. When her Mom got real ill her and ONE other sibling were the only ones who seemed to have any time to help. Her Father was 90 and was a full time care giver. Soon after her Mom went her Dad went down hill fast. Again her and one sibling were the only ones who seemed to have time to spend with him while he was in Hospice. After he was gone they all sure as hell wanted to know how much they were going to get though. They let them all go through the home and take whatever they wanted, sold the rest and then the home to divide up. His little dog? NONE of them wanted that. Few of them wanted to sell the damn thing.
Wife told them to pound sand, that we paid for the dog for him. So we ended up taking it. The best part is now that its all over no longer have to spend any time around the ones who had no time to help out.

Man, stuff like that is so gross. Those type of family members that don't lift a finger to help or visit and then swoop in like vultures when the person passes expecting money or stuff they claim they are entitled to.
And the dog part, that's infuriating. Glad you gave it a good home.

 

[ilikegunspdx]

Man, stuff like that is so gross. Those type of family members that don't lift a finger to help or visit and then swoop in like vultures when the person passes expecting money or stuff they claim they are entitled to.
And the dog part, that's infuriating. Glad you gave it a good home.

Heard lots of similar cases fwiw. Families are all so different. And when the parents die the kids and relatives can do some crazy BS.

 

[Alexx1401]

Man, stuff like that is so gross. Those type of family members that don't lift a finger to help or visit and then swoop in like vultures when the person passes expecting money or stuff they claim they are entitled to.
And the dog part, that's infuriating. Glad you gave it a good home.

We never would have believed we would have 4 damn dogs at one time
We always had them in pairs to keep each other company. Then Dad's dog came into the mix but we had baby sat him a lot since we bought him for her Dad so it was easy. Then a co worker had a couple dogs and she was not allowed. For couple years they had never seen the outside. Manager found out and told her dogs go or you go. So we took them to re-home them. The one when it found out it could run free on 60 acres twice a day was in dog heaven. Before we could find a home for her I just told Wife what the hell. What's one more
The last addition has been great for me. Our dogs if we offer a walk look outside and if 2 rain drops fall they say no way. That last dog? pouring rain, snow, ice, she could care less she want to go. So its been great getting me to get out and get some walking time too.

 

[ZA_Survivalist]

We never would have believed we would have 4 damn dogs at one time
We always had them in pairs to keep each other company. Then Dad's dog came into the mix but we had baby sat him a lot since we bought him for her Dad so it was easy. Then a co worker had a couple dogs and she was not allowed. For couple years they had never seen the outside. Manager found out and told her dogs go or you go. So we took them to re-home them. The one when it found out it could run free on 60 acres twice a day was in dog heaven. Before we could find a home for her I just told Wife what the hell. What's one more
The last addition has been great for me. Our dogs if we offer a walk look outside and if 2 rain drops fall they say no way. That last dog? pouring rain, snow, ice, she could care less she want to go. So its been great getting me to get out and get some walking time too.

That is awesome!
My wife and I plan on adopting three more after we get into our new place here in the next year or so.

 

[Nosferatu]

I'm sorry for the loss of your friend.

I hope you don't get caught up in a bunch of drama with the family. No amount of 'stuff' is worth that headache. His memory will live on with or without it.

 

[JRuby]

I love dogs in general and wish I could save them all. This is where good intentions could lead to undesirable outcomes. We have two dogs. Mike is our four year old border collie and Rosie is our three year old Aussie. These two keep our hands full and they are a large part of our lives. I would not have a problem with another dog just that we aren't looking for another. If a stray cat or dog showed up it would be welcomed providing it got along with our current fur kids, just not planning for it. In my mind if you get more companions than you can take care of you have become part of the problem.

 

[ilikegunspdx]

I love dogs in general and wish I could save them all. This is where good intentions could lead to undesirable outcomes. We have two dogs. Mike is our four year old border collie and Rosie is our three year old Aussie. These two keep our hands full and they are a large part of our lives. I would not have a problem with another dog just that we aren't looking for another. If a stray cat or dog showed up it would be welcomed providing it got along with our current fur kids, just not planning for it. In my mind if you get more companions than you can take care of you have become part of the problem.

View attachment 1990032

Love border collies and Aussies. Bicycle has been a godsend for our border collie. She gets exercise easily just by having her pull me around with a mushing harness and bike lead (bungee). She loves it.

 

[monks]

Sorry for your loss. It happens more and more the older we get. I lost my best friend of 40 years just over a year ago. I was told by his wife that he had left instructions on who got what guns he had. The problem is she doesn't know anything about them and lives in Missouri. I offered my help over video chat. I just hope his young nephews end up with some of them to remember him by. I wouldn't mind having one myself if I'm being honest. Not for the gun, just for the memories. We were best friends after all........

 

[gmerkt]

I went over to Dave's place today. It felt weird to go over there without an armful of books to exchange with him as we have for years. I picked up a copy of the will with my name on it for the firearms. The executor and I had a long talk about the situation. We don't yet have keys or combinations to the two safes. The ex. said I could also have the safes and ammo. Tomorrow I'm going to check in with a locksmith as to what they want for coming over and opening the containers up. That will involve payment, of course, but they will also want verification that we are authorized to open them. It's early innings but we've got to get started somewhere.

Also I was able to find Dave's little box with 3x5 in. index cards on it. He didn't have a computer, he kept all his records on index cards. He had an inventory on these cards of the contents of the safes. I haven't counted all the cards, but I did count 54 Colts, mostly 1911's but some others like one 1903 Pocket Model, a few .22's, etc. He told me years ago that he had over 100 each 1911's. So the others consist of Remington Rand, an Ithaca, a USS, four Kimbers, two Randalls, two AMT Hardballers, half a dozen creations on Essex frames, etc, etc. Not counting a bunch of Stars of various models. The Essex slide guns, those he would buy at the end of a gun show if he hadn't found anything else he wanted. A kind of consolation purchase.

There was one thing in there called a High Standard Longslide .45 Supermatic Trophy Model, made by the High Standard "custom shop." What this is, I think, was made in the successor High Standard factory that was set up in Texas long after the original High Standard went under. Marked 1 of 100, I don't think it's particularly valuable but so far I wasn't able to find out much about these.

There are 29 cards that represent Smith & Wesson handguns, mostly revolvers. And of those, most are J or K frame. Many stainless. No N frames, he didn't like those.

What is missing are cards for Smith & Wesson Model 69, Model 659, Winchester .30-30, and Ruger 77/22 in stainless steel. I know he had these guns at one time, but he either sold them in the years since I last saw them, or he screwed up his cards. I found one duplicate card. When we get the safes open, I will be looking for them.

There were also a number of less desirable guns. Jennings, a couple of Keltecs, Charter Arms, etc.

 

[gmerkt]

I finished going through the records. I transferred all the data over to an Excel file. The total number involved is a bit embarrassing, so I won't mention it. But among the Smith & Wessons and Colts, there were "others." Dave liked small, easily carryable guns. Not entirely for the concealment factor. But because he was a hiker, he liked thing small and light. Some of the Smiths he favored have airweight frames, which I don't particularly like as shooting guns.

Among the lesser brands, we should call them, are a number of Jennings, Jimenez, Sterling, Kel Tec, and so on. If the practical and legal aspects all align, there's no way I'm keeping all this stuff. A fraction, yes.

First of all, my paper inventory is derived from David's card file. I have yet to match that up with physical inventory, which is still locked up and inaccessible. Today I spent some time talking to various locksmiths about gaining access. Around here, competent safe technicians are not common. I finally found one many miles away but his numbers will work once we can coordinate schedules.

Once we gain access, I can determine what's actually there. Following that, there is the legal issue of possession. For me to take legal, permanent possession, it's required that they go through an FFL. And "permanent" won't be established until the estate has gone through probate. Due to details involved, these guns cannot remain in situ, so I have to place them in the custody of an FFL dealer pending permanent disposition. That is my project for tomorrow. I'm hoping my dealer has the scale to take them on. The new laws in Wash. will cause me to spend some amount of money to take legal possession of each gun. Needless to say, I'm not going to do that with the majority of this equipment. The unwanted ones may well remain at the dealer for him to dispose of. Which I would have to do in any event.

Gee, I wish my pal Dave was still around. Already I'm getting weary of the ups and downs of this issue. It was exciting at first. And it was kinda fun to go through the list. There is always the possibility of my needing legal counsel before this whole story is over and done with. However, my interest is secondary to the primary beneficiary's interest, which involves maybe three quarters of a million dollars of real estate. He has vowed to spend every last dollar of the estate to fight off the disinherited brother. So that fight is the one that will decide if I, as the lesser beneficiary, come out to the good. We don't know yet if this will come up.

 

[gmerkt]

His little dog? NONE of them wanted that.

Dave had a cat that he'd rescued from a vacant house next door. The executor who is the primary beneficiary is keeping the cat and the house. I was hoping that I wouldn't have to look out for the cat's interests, since I already have two.

What kind of a low-down son-of-a-biscuit would abandon a pet in a vacant house for a month and a half? Dave and his friend (now executor) were feeding it through a window after while.

 

[orygun]

Sorry for your loss, @gmerkt .
One of my good friends and mentor in all things related to engine building and race cars has been fighting Cancer for a year and a half. Things were going well for quite a while, but last Thursday, his normal day for treatment, he came in to say "Good bye". Doctors gave him 2 weeks.

This one gonna suck.

 

[P7M13]

Sounds like a lot of work. I hope it remains smooth.

It felt weird to go over there without an armful of books to exchange with him as we have for years.

I'll bet. I think of a deceased friend every time I use the tools he gave me. My thoughts used to be of missing him, now I ponder more on how blessed I was to have known him.

Heard lots of similar cases fwiw. Families are all so different. And when the parents die the kids and relatives can do some crazy BS.

Fifteen years after my mother's passing, my siblings still squabble over her stuff. I don't bother with that quagmire. She had original paintings, sketches and sculptures from well known artists that had a combined worth in significant six figures. I'm the one who packed her stuff, photographed and cataloged everything, and shipped it off to the executor in Nebraska. In looking up the artists from the signatures while cataloging, that's how I discovered how valuable the pieces were. The one piece of hers I loved the most, she gave to me as a house-warming gift when I moved to Oregon -- a child's pastel drawing of a house. It still hangs on my wall.

 

[gmerkt]

Fifteen years after my mother's passing, my siblings still squabble over her stuff.

Even many years later, I'm so glad that didn't happen to me. My mother lived to age 96 and died in 2017. She lived 1,200 miles away. She wasn't wealthy but she left a significant estate. My sister was in charge of it. I was asked for my opinion occasionally, but she ran the show. She was very fair and equitable about it. I never complained about any move she made, even if one or two were less than fully successful. When it was all over, she told me she appreciated how easy I made the process. We split up what was important, didn't quarrel over the few material objects that we one or the other wanted to hang onto. It just wasn't that important. I didn't get greedy; several things that I initially thought of keeping just turned out to be too much trouble and I let them go physically and mentally.

A lot of household things went to waste. At the time, I thought what a shame it was. Now I just think I'm glad I wasn't able to save them, because it would just be so much more clutter in my life. When my mother's parents died in rather quick succession, her brother (my uncle) was executor. He couldn't part with anything. He crowded all that extra stuff from his folks into his house that you had to get around using pathways. He had stuff lining the hall walls in his modest sized house.

 

[P7M13]

Even many years later, I'm so glad that didn't happen to me. My mother lived to age 96 and died in 2017. She lived 1,200 miles away. She wasn't wealthy but she left a significant estate. My sister was in charge of it. I was asked for my opinion occasionally, but she ran the show. She was very fair and equitable about it. I never complained about any move she made, even if one or two were less than fully successful. When it was all over, she told me she appreciated how easy I made the process. We split up what was important, didn't quarrel over the few material objects that we one or the other wanted to hang onto. It just wasn't that important. I didn't get greedy; several things that I initially thought of keeping just turned out to be too much trouble and I let them go physically and mentally.

A lot of household things went to waste. At the time, I thought what a shame it was. Now I just think I'm glad I wasn't able to save them, because it would just be so much more clutter in my life. When my mother's parents died in rather quick succession, her brother (my uncle) was executor. He couldn't part with anything. He crowded all that extra stuff from his folks into his house that you had to get around using pathways. He had stuff lining the hall walls in his modest sized house.

I was brutal with my mom's household items and brickabrack. I'd photograph, post on a web page for the family, "anyone want?" If there were no takers in 12 hours, it went into piles for donate, recycle, or dumpster. All of my siblings had done well for themselves, so almost everything was triaged into those piles.
I had recently divorced and purchased a house, so I took all mom's stainless mixing bowls and cooking utensils. I grew up with these things, most are older than me by 10 years, and still cherish them every time I use them. Mom was an avid reader, and she had walls of first edition books. The china, silver, vases and books all went to my sisters, and I felt good knowing they were going there.
Once in a while a sibling will ask me, "hey, do you remember x? What happened to it?" The website is still up, so I'll tell them to check it and if it's catalogued there on the pages, they know where I shipped it.

 

[1911Fanatic]

I was brutal with my mom's household items and brickabrack. I'd photograph, post on a web page for the family, "anyone want?" If there were no takers in 12 hours, it went into piles for donate, recycle, or dumpster. All of my siblings had done well for themselves, so almost everything was triaged into those piles.
I had recently divorced and purchased a house, so I took all mom's stainless mixing bowls and cooking utensils. I grew up with these things, most are older than me by 10 years, and still cherish them every time I use them. Mom was an avid reader, and she had walls of first edition books. The china, silver, vases and books all went to my sisters, and I felt good knowing they were going there.
Once in a while a sibling will ask me, "hey, do you remember x? What happened to it?" The website is still up, so I'll tell them to check it and if it's catalogued there on the pages, they know where I shipped it.

Yeah, I still use silverware that belonged to my grandparents and I have some mixing bowls that were my great grandmother's. I have one glas left out of a set that was my grandparents. I have memories every time I use it.

 

[orygun]

Even many years later, I'm so glad that didn't happen to me. My mother lived to age 96 and died in 2017. She lived 1,200 miles away. She wasn't wealthy but she left a significant estate. My sister was in charge of it. I was asked for my opinion occasionally, but she ran the show. She was very fair and equitable about it. I never complained about any move she made, even if one or two were less than fully successful. When it was all over, she told me she appreciated how easy I made the process. We split up what was important, didn't quarrel over the few material objects that we one or the other wanted to hang onto. It just wasn't that important. I didn't get greedy; several things that I initially thought of keeping just turned out to be too much trouble and I let them go physically and mentally.

A lot of household things went to waste. At the time, I thought what a shame it was. Now I just think I'm glad I wasn't able to save them, because it would just be so much more clutter in my life. When my mother's parents died in rather quick succession, her brother (my uncle) was executor. He couldn't part with anything. He crowded all that extra stuff from his folks into his house that you had to get around using pathways. He had stuff lining the hall walls in his modest sized house.

When we cleaned out Mom's house in 2020, we were not able to have an estate sale. I wasn't happy that a lot of stuff went to a lady who was going to store it and sell it, all at her profit. But for the most part, I kept my mouth shut. My oldest sister was the executor. She doesn't handle stressful situations well and I was not about to rock the boat. None of the important stuff went to that lady.
Mom had an extensive collection of depression glass. We decided to let the family (nephews/nieces) take what they would like, boxed the rest of the set and we stashed it in the house at our tree farm. My wife and I have one full set of plates/glasses in our motorhome. I can't even see one piece of that without thinking of her. I loved Mom and I know she would be happy that we are using it.
Mom had given me all of Dad's guns when he passed 4 years before. I've already passed a couple to my only nephews (other sister's sons), because they need to stay in the family.
Other than that I brought a lot of Dad's garage stuff home. Stuff that came to Milwaukie when we moved here in '74 from John Day. Stuff I should have let that lady take... I'm slowly weeding thru that.
Being sentimental can be a curse.

I'm very fortunate to be from a small, tight family.

 

[gmerkt]

I took all mom's stainless mixing bowls and cooking utensils. I grew up with these things,

I don't do much in the kitchen. But I do some things. After WW2 was over, there was a big rush for household products. Suddenly aluminum was available again and the Wear Ever line of product was very popular. My mother had quite a few of those items that we used on a daily basis during my childhood. Over the years, some fell by the wayside. But I retained a favorite, large pan and lid for steaming pastry. It has other uses, but that's what I have it for. My mother gave it to me years before she died; she'd gone on to newer kitchen ware.

I brought a lot of Dad's garage stuff home.

Yes, I have some of my dad's tools. Unfortunately, some got stolen in a garage burglary in 1985. I still have his Blackhawk floor jack. A hefty one, back when a 1-1/2 ton was about three times as large those little things of the same rating made in China or Taiwan. The little pump piston and seals had gone bad. The parts are scarce and expensive. I had to think hard about should I repair or replace it. The sentimentality issue won the day and I bought the parts and repaired it myself.
I remember when my dad bought that Blackhawk floor jack in 1967. In fact, for some reason, the receipt was still around in his papers that I have. I remember it being a very big purchase for something he'd wanted for a long time. When money was worth more, people in general didn't have as much of it to throw around, and had to work hard for what they did get.

 

[LibertyNews]

Sorry for your loss, and good luck navigating the current WA firearms bureaucracy.