I don't know where to file this one!!

Lazyfaire · Feb 23, 2026

Got this story in a newsletter.

A Best Buy manager saw a guy putting a laptop under his coat and headed for the door with it. When the manager confronted him the guy pulled a knife and ran out the door.....right into a table of 4 Marines collecting for Toys for Tots. They did stop the thief, but he managed to stab one of the Marines in the back. Turned out to be a minor wound.

The subject was also taken to the hospital a little worse off. He had 2 broken arms, a broken ankle, a broken leg, several missing teeth, possible broken ribs, multiple contusions, a broken nose and a broken jaw. Reports are that the injuries were sustained when he fell off the curb after stabbing the Marine.

VinnieBoomBah · Feb 23, 2026

Lazyfaire said:
Got this (partially true) story in a newsletter.

A Best Buy manager saw a guy putting a laptop under his coat and headed for the door with it. When the manager confronted him the guy pulled a knife and ran out the door.....right into a table of 4 Marines collecting for Toys for Tots. They did stop the thief, but he managed to stab one of the Marines in the back. Turned out to be a minor wound.
The subject was also taken to the hospital a little worse off. He had 2 broken arms, a broken ankle, a broken leg, several missing teeth, possible broken ribs, multiple contusions, a broken nose and a broken jaw. Reports are that the injuries were sustained when he fell off the curb after stabbing the Marine.

Cleaned that up for ya'

Marine hurt in Black Friday stabbing at Best Buy in Georgia

AUGUSTA, Ga. - A Marine reservist collecting Toys for Tots donations at an Augusta Best Buy was stabbed in the back Friday afternoon while helping subdue a shoplifting suspect. Fellow Marines ident…

www.jacksonville.com

Lazyfaire · Feb 23, 2026

VinnieBoomBah said:
Cleaned that up for ya'

Marine hurt in Black Friday stabbing at Best Buy in Georgia

AUGUSTA, Ga. - A Marine reservist collecting Toys for Tots donations at an Augusta Best Buy was stabbed in the back Friday afternoon while helping subdue a shoplifting suspect. Fellow Marines ident…

www.jacksonville.com

More interesting the way that I heard it though!

Bobbygun · Feb 23, 2026

Depends on what "subdued him" entails. :s0092:

I think a guy might be pretty "subdusive" if all of his arms and legs were broken. :s0140:

Sorry @VinnieBoomBah, I like @Lazyfaire's version better, even though there is a slight, miniscule, almost nonexistent chance that it's not true.

VinnieBoomBah · Feb 23, 2026

Bobbygun said:
Depends on what "subdued him" entails.

I think a guy might be pretty "subdusive" if all of his arms and legs were broken.

Sorry @VinnieBoomBah, I like @Lazyfaire's version better, even though there is a slight, miniscule, almost nonexistent chance that it's not true.

Lazyfaire · Feb 23, 2026

Bobbygun said:
Depends on what "subdued him" entails.

I think a guy might be pretty "subdusive" if all of his arms and legs were broken.

Sorry @VinnieBoomBah, I like @Lazyfaire's version better, even though there is a slight, miniscule, almost nonexistent chance that it's not true.

I read it as a joke when I read it too.

VinnieBoomBah · Feb 23, 2026

I remember when it first started making the rounds 15 years ago and how mad some people got when the fAkE NeWs tried to change the story to hide "what those brave Marines did" :s0114:

Lazyfaire · Feb 23, 2026

Bobbygun said:
Depends on what "subdued him" entails.

I think a guy might be pretty "subdusive" if all of his arms and legs were broken.

Sorry @VinnieBoomBah, I like @Lazyfaire's version better, even though there is a slight, miniscule, almost nonexistent chance that it's not true.

Obviously he tripped and hurt himself

Alexx1401 · Feb 23, 2026

As soon as I read it I knew it had to be humor, but there is a reason its so funny. One party has been all in on scum walking out of stores with anything they can carry. This has gotten so bad that the party supporting this is having a real hard time keeping the truth hidden. The people who supported this end up paying for it. Cost has to go up. Many stores close. The best is when large food stores just give up. Here come the people to SCREAM about how there is no place close to them to shop and scream for law makers to "do something". One part of the city I live in is getting just what they kept asking for. One large retailer gave up, here comes the screaming. There is one other large retailer there, a Winco. They are going to be next to give up. Screaming will be heard for miles as those screaming got what they asked for. :s0092:

Knobgoblin · Feb 23, 2026

VinnieBoomBah said:
View attachment 2255104

Meh, to the facts.

And F**; them feelings.

Put me down for some good old fashioned wishful thinking!

Lazyfaire · Feb 23, 2026

Alexx1401 said:
As soon as I read it I knew it had to be humor, but there is a reason its so funny. One party has been all in on scum walking out of stores with anything they can carry. This has gotten so bad that the party supporting this is having a real hard time keeping the truth hidden. The people who supported this end up paying for it. Cost has to go up. Many stores close. The best is when large food stores just give up. Here come the people to SCREAM about how there is no place close to them to shop and scream for law makers to "do something". One part of the city I live in is getting just what they kept asking for. One large retailer gave up, here comes the screaming. There is one other large retailer there, a Winco. They are going to be next to give up. Screaming will be heard for miles as those screaming got what they asked for.

And the big stores will not return, and the place becomes a food desert. The only food is found in bodegas and the like because many of the residents just steal from and trash the areas in which they live.

boattail · Feb 23, 2026

This one makes you feel all warm and fuzzy...
https://abc7.com/post/tesla-driver-...ates-hawaii-prison-arrest-road-rage/16417302/

Stomper · Feb 23, 2026

Bobbygun said:
Depends on what "subdued him" entrails.

Proper USMC protocol dictates using the subdued subject's own intestines to choke and bind the subdued subject.

That is all, carry on! SEMPER FI!

Alexx1401 · Feb 23, 2026

boattail said:
This one makes you feel all warm and fuzzy...
https://abc7.com/post/tesla-driver-...ates-hawaii-prison-arrest-road-rage/16417302/

So here we have an asshat that has for many years run around attacking people and running away. Courts let him get away with it over and over. He is playing a VERY dangerous little game that may well get him shot. Meantime he found some people who he could not attack and run away from and they gave him a lesson in self control he certainly needed.

Stomper · Feb 23, 2026

Alexx1401 said:
So here we have an asshat that has for many years run around attacking people and running away. Courts let him get away with it over and over. He is playing a VERY dangerous little game that may well get him shot. Meantime he found some people who he could not attack and run away from and they gave him a lesson in self control he certainly needed.

Got himself a heaping helping of steamy-hot haole pot-pie!

Nosferatu · Feb 23, 2026

Where did he manage to find the ONE laptop that didn't have 14 leashes tethering it to the table making it so you can't close the lid without getting several fingers tangled?

Provincial · Feb 23, 2026

When we had those forest fires all over Oregon about five years ago, a fellow who was starting a fire in in a remote area west of Medford was caught by some locals. He "fell down" and was in pretty bad shape when the Deputies arrived to arrest him.