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We had a security guard at work a time ago that was just like this guy.
Fat black guy named Captan Youngblood.
He was always talking about how he's protecting the area from crackheads, robberies, and rapes.

He even had a "tacticool" drop leg holster for his gatorade bottle.
Captain Youngblood!!! Hells yes I worked with the guy! I made the exact same parallel in my mind. It always tickled me pink when he'd answer the phone "Captain Youngblood." Priceless!
 

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