You know you're getting old when...

[Captain O]

a) Sir Elton John's "Crocodile Rock" is playing in a Muzak format as you get into an elevator.

b) When you approach the Box Office at your local theater and you're asked: "Will that be a Senior and a regular admission?"

c) Your waist measurement is more than half your age.

d) You proudly state that you paid less for your dental implants than you had for your used car.

e) You worry that your prescription arch supports won't fit more than one pair of shoes.

f) You have to search extensively and pay a premium price, for Vitalis Hair Tonic. (I had to do this very thing)!

Am I alone?

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[Member 34319]

Not quite there yet but the cute girl at Dutch brothers told me she was 19 and I suddenly felt like a pervert.

 

[Sgt Nambu]

You know your getting old when...

You don't want to find a parking lot and cut cookies in the snow!

 

[308]

You know your getting old when...

You don't want to find a parking lot and cut cookies in the snow!

I'm 59 and I still like doing that

 

[gimpy51]

Not quite there yet but the cute girl at Dutch brothers told me she was 19 and I suddenly felt like a pervert.

On the other hand, I AM OLD (65) and I feel like a pervert every time my wife comes to bed.

 

[Captain O]

On the other hand, I AM OLD (65) and I feel like a pervert every time my wife comes to bed.

That's a good thing!

 

[Capn Jack]

You know you're getting old when:
You make noises like a camel every time you get down on your knees, or stand up.

OK Nambu... How about...."Bend Down"?

I was told if anything ever happened to my knees again, I'd have to see
a Blacksmith to have them fixed.

 

[Sgt Nambu]

Getting down on your knees? WTF is that?!?!?!

 

[308]

Getting down on your knees? WTF is that?!?!?!

Clearly he is a man of faith.

 

[DB is Here]

At 47 I'm one of the older guys in my profession...that said I'll make a reference to a TV show I watched as a kid and just get blank stares. I tell them we used to ride in the back of pick ups on the Hi-way, drink water from a hose and get driven around town with Mom and not wear seats belts...That really makes their heads spin.

 

[Sgt Nambu]

On the other hand, I AM OLD (65) and I feel like a pervert every time my wife comes to bed.

If you quack like a duck!

And, if you .... like a duck!

You are probably a perverted old duck!!!

 

[Certaindeaf]

Not quite there yet but the cute girl at Dutch brothers told me she was 19 and I suddenly felt like a pervert.

You overhear someone saying they were born in like 1998 and you go like, wtf?!

 

[Member 34319]

She was class of 2015.

Sad, but probably good news, she really doesn't flirt with me any more.

Now I'm just that nice older guy,

 

[Certaindeaf]

You know you're getting old when..
you realize that you likely have entirely too much .22 ammo.

I'm not and I don't so in reality this is unpossible. lol

 

[Captain O]

She was class of 2015.

Sad, but probably good news, she really doesn't flirt with me any more.

Now I'm just that nice older guy,

Trust me, you'll get over it. I have a way about me that keeps people thinking that I'm ten years my junior. I look at the 19-year old kiddies and see nothing but children that are still "contemplating their navels".

Most young people don't understand life until they reach their early 30's. This is as God had intended.

 

[NWGlockgal]

The snap, crackle and pop you hear in the morning isn't coming from your cereal.

 

[Vendor Hidden]

People tell me, "Hey you're as young as you feel."

And you know, they're right:

My back feels like a teenager - it goes out at night.
My nose feels like a teenager - it's growing long hair.
My butt feels like a teenager - it's getting pimples.
My Johnson is just like a teenager - no matter what I do I can't get it to work.

 

[Certaindeaf]

People tell me, "Hey you're as young as you feel."

And you know, they're right:

My back feels like a teenager - it goes out at night.
My nose feels like a teenager - it's growing long hair.
My butt feels like a teenager - it's getting pimples.
My Johnson is just like a teenager - no matter what I do I can't get it to work.

You forgot "My balls feel like hacky sacks bouncing off my ankles when I walk". lol

 

[Bigbaddude]

I feel really old at work when they hire a new guy and I have been working at the same job long then he's be alive.

 

[308]

I feel really old at work when they hire a new guy and I have been working at the same job long then he's be alive.

Hah! I told my coworker I was designing HVAC systems when he was still sitting in his highchair smearing Spaghetti-Os all over his face.