Thoughts on spending 3k in 3 days for no reason...

[Gunbuggy]

Got a last minute wedding invite from a cousin who I'm not really close with and know that they couldn't care less if I was there or not. I'm getting married next summer and wasn't considering inviting them because I assumed they could care less.

Anways im getting slack from my folks for saying I don't want to go.

Here's the deal tho. They're Californians. They're also the type of ppl that want a wedding they can't afford in an area they and their guests can't afford. My parents are literally not able to afford to go to this wedding but they're gonna go either way. I said F that. I'm not gonna spend 3k in flights and hotels to maybe see the cousin for 10 seconds and say congrats.

But as I said, I'm getting slack for it. Am I a total dick for thinking it's not worth it?

Me and the fiance are on a big savings kick and we've added another 6 figures to our savings account in the last 3.5 years and we are super conservative with our spending. These people haven't reached out to us in 3+ years but now we are being pressured to come to their wedding.

Am I a dick? Am I being selfish for saying I don't wanna go?

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[arakboss]

Got a last minute wedding invite from a cousin who I'm not really close with and know that they couldn't care less if I was there or not. I'm getting married next summer and wasn't considering inviting them because I assumed they could care less.

Anways im getting slack from my folks for saying I don't want to go.

Here's the deal tho. They're Californians. They're also the type of ppl that want a wedding they can't afford in an area they and their guests can't afford. My parents are literally not able to afford to go to this wedding but they're gonna go either way. I said F that. I'm not gonna spend 3k in flights and hotels to maybe see the cousin for 10 seconds and say congrats.

But as I said, I'm getting slack for it. Am I a total dick for thinking it's not worth it?

Me and the fiance are on a big savings kick and we've added another 6 figures to our savings account in the last 3.5 years and we are super conservative with our spending. These people haven't reached out to us in 3+ years but now we are being pressured to come to their wedding.

Am I a dick? Am I being selfish for saying I don't wanna go?

Covid

 

[mrblond]

no

 

[Gunbuggy]

Covid

That's a good point. A few years ago they asked us to take a test before meeting up because we were unvaxxed LOL. Maybe I just throw out the "I got covid" and maybe the unvaxed guy with covid will get uninvited lol

 

[Gunbuggy]

no

Kinda what I thought.

 

[arakboss]

There is no way I would spend 10,000 rounds of 9mm ammo to attend a wedding for a cousin I barely keep up with.

 

[Gunbuggy]

There is no way I would spend 10,000 rounds of 9mm ammo to attend a wedding for a cousin I barely keep up with.

Agreed

 

[Provincial]

There is no way I would spend 10,000 rounds of 9mm ammo to attend a wedding for a cousin I barely keep up with.

Not to mention that most of that money will be spent with people who want to disarm you.

 

[Gunbuggy]

Not to mention that most of that money will be spent with people who want to disarm you.

Literally. They call themsevles conservative Californians but they'd be classified as liberal washingtonians up here lol

 

[Provincial]

Literally. They call themsevles conservative Californians but they'd be classified as liberal washingtonians up here lol

And the hotels, gas stations, restaurants, airlines ...........

 

[Lilhigbee]

So many reasons to not go, and not one good reason to go. Seems pretty straight-forward to me.

 

[Nosferatu]

I don't even go to weddings for people I DO like.

 

[Alexx1401]

Am I a dick? Am I being selfish for saying I don't wanna go?

Its your family. If it was me? In the situation you laid out I would not go and would tell anyone who did not like it to pound sand.

 

[albin25]

Really... They have NO interest in you actually attending.
They just want you to send a pricey gift.

Might I suggest;
2-25 round mags of 9mm hollow points
2-25 round mags of 22lr
2-25 round mags of 223

THEN... 1 wedding-day phone call to the local cops (to congratulate the greedy happy couple)

But then ..... a Panda gift card would be nice too!

 

[ilikegunspdx]

Got a last minute wedding invite from a cousin who I'm not really close with and know that they couldn't care less if I was there or not. I'm getting married next summer and wasn't considering inviting them because I assumed they could care less.

Anways im getting slack from my folks for saying I don't want to go.

Here's the deal tho. They're Californians. They're also the type of ppl that want a wedding they can't afford in an area they and their guests can't afford. My parents are literally not able to afford to go to this wedding but they're gonna go either way. I said F that. I'm not gonna spend 3k in flights and hotels to maybe see the cousin for 10 seconds and say congrats.

But as I said, I'm getting slack for it. Am I a total dick for thinking it's not worth it?

Me and the fiance are on a big savings kick and we've added another 6 figures to our savings account in the last 3.5 years and we are super conservative with our spending. These people haven't reached out to us in 3+ years but now we are being pressured to come to their wedding.

Am I a dick? Am I being selfish for saying I don't wanna go?

No you are not. If I were you I would send a gift and well wishes and call it good. 2 cents

 

[gryghin]

Am I a dick? Am I being selfish for saying I don't wanna go?

Really depends on what level of cousin, what the relationship is of your parents... Will your Grands be there?

Some families grow up in different parts of the country because of job situations.

We come from military families, both my wife and I... so our siblings and cousins in our generation live literally all over this country. Though we are the furthest away from everyone, family even what most consider extended, is still important.

 

[Cavedweller]

Pro Tip: They don't really want you to come. They're just inviting everyone they can think of so they can get as many wedding gifts as possible. They're thinking distant relatives will respectfully decline but send a nice present out of guilt.

Advice: Pick out a nice greeting card, something very tasteful and reasonably expensive as far as greeting cards go, and inscribe it with a personal message sincerely wishing them many happy years together. Save them some money by not attending. Maybe send them 50 bucks to start them off on the right foot. If you've got 6 figures in the bank you can afford it.

Edit: Or maybe they're just being really nice and don't want you to feel left out. Either way, see above advice.

 

[TTSX]

$3k is new SCAR money. Would you rather have that or a resentful family get together?

 

[JackFrost]

That's a good point. A few years ago they asked us to take a test before meeting up because we were unvaxxed LOL. Maybe I just throw out the "I got covid" and maybe the unvaxed guy with covid will get uninvited lol

Even more of a reason to not give a tinkers d@mn about the wedding. Screw them!
Save your money and spend it on something actually worth having or a memory worth making or invest it. Family can kick rocks especially if they are stupid about the coof! Send em a get better soon card with a $5 Starbucks card!

 

[sealine]

If they're the kind of people who want a wedding they can't afford, send the cousin a card and a referral to a local divorce attorney.

You won't be nearly as pissed in 2 years for blowing $3k to attend a wedding that ended in divorce. And the cousin will have a head start on finding someone to help them fight over who's gonna be responsible for the biggest amount of debt they have.