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The Coyote Principle

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by fredball, Oct 28, 2015.

  1. fredball

    fredball Vancouver, WA Well-Known Member

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    California
    • The Governor of California is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks the Governor's dog, then bites the Governor.
    • The Governor starts to intervene, but reflects upon the movie "Bambi" and then realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what is natural.
    • He calls animal control. Animal Control captures the coyote and bills the state $200 testing it for diseases and $500 for relocating it.
    • He calls a veterinarian. The vet collects the dead dog and bills the State $200 testing it for diseases.
    • The Governor goes to hospital and spends $3,500 getting checked for diseases from the coyote and on getting his bite wound bandaged.
    • The running trail gets shut down for 6 months while Fish & Game conducts a $100,000 survey to make sure the area is now free of dangerous animals.
    • The Governor spends $50,000 in state funds implementing a "coyote awareness program" for residents of the area.
    • The State Legislature spends $2 million to study how to better treat rabies and how to permanently eradicate the disease throughout the world.
    • The Governor's security agent is fired for not stopping the attack. The state spends $150,000 to hire and train a new agent with additional special training for the nature of coyotes.
    • PETA protests the coyote's relocation and files a $5 million suit against the state.
    TEXAS
    • The Governor of Texas is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks his dog.
    • The Governor shoots the coyote with his state-issued pistol and keeps jogging. The Governor has spent $.50 on a .45 ACP hollow point cartridge.
    • The buzzards eat the dead coyote.
    And that, my friends, is why California is broke and Texas is not.
    "Any man who thinks he can be happy and prosperous by letting the government take care of him better take a closer look at the American Indian." Henry Ford
     
  2. Sgt Nambu

    Sgt Nambu Oregon Bronze Supporter Bronze Supporter

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    LOLOLOL!!!:D

    Good one Fredball! Short of actual rabies, no 'yote is stupid enough to attack any of my dogs! Proving that private citizens are more fiscally responsible than even the best polititions!:cool:
     
    DuneHopper likes this.
  3. teflon97239

    teflon97239 Portland, OR Well-Known Member

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    What a relief. I saw this thread and thought it might be about my dating history back in San Diego.
     
    Last edited: Oct 29, 2015
    no time, MTpockets and BoonDocks36 like this.
  4. clearconscience

    clearconscience Vancouver, WA Well-Known Member

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    You forgot that peta sues the texas gov for giving lead poisoning to the buzzards.
     
    coyotecaller and mjbskwim like this.
  5. Dyjital

    Dyjital Albany, Ore Flavorite Member Bronze Supporter

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    Texas is the second highest state with debt in the nation if I remember correctly.
     
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  6. clearconscience

    clearconscience Vancouver, WA Well-Known Member

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    Maybe because they have the longer southern border?
     
  7. Medic!

    Medic! What just happened? Has eagle eyes. But cant remember what he saw. Bronze Supporter

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    The coyote principal.

    When you shoot at a coyote and miss. You train that coyote to avoid coming in to a call.

    Did I win? :s0108:
     
  8. Jamie6.5

    Jamie6.5 Western OR Well-Known Member

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    You remember wrong. Especially when debt is calculated as a percentage of GSP, or on a per-capita basis.
     
  9. Dyjital

    Dyjital Albany, Ore Flavorite Member Bronze Supporter

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    Oops...

    1: California 617 billion
    2: New York 300 billion
    3: Texas 287 billion
    (2012 stats- didn't find enough time to find 2014/2013)

    I was wrong, 3rd not 2nd.
     
  10. Jamie6.5

    Jamie6.5 Western OR Well-Known Member

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    And when measured as a percentage of GSP it's way lower than that.
    When measured on a per-capita basis it's way lower than that.