The "Boy Friend Gun"

[Flopsweat]

Saiga 12. It combines the intimidation of the huge 12 gauge barrel with the evil black rifle look of the AK.

Now, when you find a particularly inappropriate candidate, this is the time to discreetly load a blank into the gun and have yourself a little "AD" in the back room just to help dissuade Sparky from that second date. "Dad!" "What? It was an accident."

 

[RoneKiln]

The thing is the boyfriend is gonna think its cool and going to want to go shooting with you. Your daughter will get pissed that you are getting more attention from her bf than she is and probably storm around the house for a few days.

I'd be OK with that. Any kid that gets along with me will probably do his best to treat my daughter with respect.

Have any random guns out, obviously having just been or just about to be cleaned, but be focused on sharpening the machette.

My preference would be for my little girl to be cleaning the guns instead of me. I want it very clear to any guy that my girl can and will kill him herself if he crosses a line she does not appreciate. I'm just there to help dig the hole afterwards.

 

[lucky guy]

Pair of dried mountain oysters for a door knocker. He'll ask and you'll say, "Oh those? Took those off some guy that used to come around once in a while."

 

[RicInOR]

Pictures from your NZ Tahr hunting trip.

He'll realize there is no place on the planet he could hide, at least that is what I realized when I met my GF (now wife's) Dad for the first time.

That and some home-jar'd meat of various animals he'd rather not think about - Lion, Gator, etc.

 

[Kimber Custom]

 

[mjbskwim]

I have a son that loves guns so some of these things won't work on all guys. But I'm on board with RoneKiln. Knives or machetes are scarier.

A friend's daughter loves to shoot and is pretty good at it. So they take the new BF shooting. She hits the human silhouette target in the crotch a few times . He realizes she isn't to be Fcked with,let alone dad.
They either are good kids or never talk to her again

NOT SAFE FOR WORK

 

[slimmer13]

None of these scare tactics will have the least effect. The influence of the gun in his pants is MUCH stronger than any fear from the gun in your hand.

As a teenager more than a couple of fathers tried the old "flash a shotgun" trick and none of their daughter's virtue was intact for long.

That being said......

 

[61henry]

I like the car battery and jumper cables by the front door, if asked tell them how it is great for shocking their nads if they misbehave.

 

[cueball1214]

First, I would go with a straight forward double shotgun. simple and snapping it shut makes the point come across very well. Second, if you have a friend that would like to come over and hang out before your daughter gets picked up by the boy, you should do something like what they did in Bad Boys 2. Teamed up on the poor kid. Just a though..

 

[marty8587]

Just a 12 guage pump being painted white with a brush for a "Formal Wedding"!

 

[Matjenan]

The first dad that pulled that stunt on me when i came to courting his daughter was cleaning a nice revolver i think a .38 and at that time i was just a dumb teenager and i did not get it. I thought wow what a cool gun.

I have to agree. A father of one of my GFs was a cop and pulled this at the kitchen table with 3 of his buddies. I just thought it was a normal night at their place when I picked her up. Didn't slow anything down for our physical relationship.

Saying that I'll probably do the same when my daughter is old enough.

 

[B1911]

Reminds me of this that had been around for years.

Ten Rules for Dating My Daughter:

Rule One:

If you pull into my driveway and honk you’d better be delivering a package, because you’re sure not picking anything up.

Rule Two:

You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter’s body, I will remove them.

Rule Three:

I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don’t take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, In order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.

Rule Four:

I’m sure you’ve been told that in today’s world, sex without utilizing a “barrier method” of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate: when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.

Rule Five:

In order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is “early”

Rule Six:

I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.

Rule Seven:

As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don’t you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?

Rule Eight:

The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter:

- Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool.

- Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight.

- Places where there is darkness.

- Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness.

- Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka zipped up to her throat.

- Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which feature chainsaws are okay.

- Hockey games are okay.

- Old folks homes are better.

Rule Nine:

Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help you God. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.

Rule Ten:

Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy outside of Hanoi. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car-there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.

 

[hermannr]

We raised 5 daughters, now have 14 grandkids...

Someone earlier made a comment about rebeling? Yep, that does happen, I worked very hard to make sure it did not happen to me, but I did notice that the fastest way to get rid of a guy was to approve of him.

One day our youngest daughter asked, say dad, what would you do if I brough a black guy home? My answer was "Is he Lutheran?"...never met the guy, if he really existed in the first place...It may have just been "testing, Testing 123" Yep, be very very careful what you openly do not approve of.

Only stuck the Win 1897 against the head of one of them...he entered through (#3 daughter) her window, he did exit out the front door, and never came through that window again.

 

[4dogs]

I took my daughter and her boyfriend out to the range on their last visit. He's a better shot than I am.

 

[DeanfromOregon]

Cleaning any gun is good, a 500# bench is better though.

 

[bmgm37]

Just hand a clipboard with the attached "Permission to Date My Daughter form" for starters...

 

[Muddslinger12]

Have to agree with Mark W. on this one!

You really should reconsider your approach to this matter. Although it makes a great song in the real world (atleast in modern times, may have flown in the "old days") but "cleaning your gun" when the BF comes over is a bad idea. For 3 main reasons
1st (as previously mentioned) It will most likely backfire on you when the BF gets interested in your guns. 2nd (like Mark W said) The will rebel! Just do the opposite. And 3rd and must important it could very easily be considered "brandishing" (and rightfully so) (WA res need to worry bout this not sure bout OR res tho) But showing your guns ESPECIALLY while TRYING to look INTIMIDATING is Brandishing! So when the wrong boy gets scared (or just wants to get you out the way) he goes running home to mommy and daddy next thing you know your front door is getting kicked and and your house gets turned upside down and bye bye guns! (And how you gonna protect your daughter from behind bars?)

There are much more logical and EFFECTIVE ways to handle the situation. Like a wise man once said "The pen is more powerful then a sword" (obviously they didnt have guns back then lol) but point is use your brain not your collection of prized firearms to deter "undisirables" best bet is reverse Pyschology (as mentioned) Although every case may be different I would personally try to be encouraging and keep her busy in other activities (that shes intrested in of course!) and hope she never has time to get in the wrong situation.

GOOD LUCK!

**Also if/when you figure this out PLEASE write a book for the rest of us. Although I am currently on the flipside of this, my day will come when I am in this same ageless situation.

 

[ZigZagZeke]

A throw away 38 snub with cloth tape on the grip and trigger. The piece should be mounted in a display case along with multiple pictures of your prized backhoe.

And you need an autographed picture of Richard Nixon, preferably with his arm around your shoulder, hanging next to those of the backhoe.

 

[ZigZagZeke]

Have to agree with Mark W. on this one!

You really should reconsider your approach to this matter. Although it makes a great song in the real world (atleast in modern times, may have flown in the "old days") but "cleaning your gun" when the BF comes over is a bad idea. For 3 main reasons
1st (as previously mentioned) It will most likely backfire on you when the BF gets interested in your guns. 2nd (like Mark W said) The will rebel! Just do the opposite. And 3rd and must important it could very easily be considered "brandishing" (and rightfully so) (WA res need to worry bout this not sure bout OR res tho) But showing your guns ESPECIALLY while TRYING to look INTIMIDATING is Brandishing! So when the wrong boy gets scared (or just wants to get you out the way) he goes running home to mommy and daddy next thing you know your front door is getting kicked and and your house gets turned upside down and bye bye guns! (And how you gonna protect your daughter from behind bars?)

There are much more logical and EFFECTIVE ways to handle the situation. Like a wise man once said "The pen is more powerful then a sword" (obviously they didnt have guns back then lol) but point is use your brain not your collection of prized firearms to deter "undisirables" best bet is reverse Pyschology (as mentioned) Although every case may be different I would personally try to be encouraging and keep her busy in other activities (that shes intrested in of course!) and hope she never has time to get in the wrong situation.

GOOD LUCK!

**Also if/when you figure this out PLEASE write a book for the rest of us. Although I am currently on the flipside of this, my day will come when I am in this same ageless situation.

Didn't really read the first post, did he...

 

[clearconscience]

I always like the scene in the movie Bad Boys 2. But the acting crazy part does the best. Firearm doesn't matter.
My wife is about to have our first. I'm planning on having two pistols and saying here's my handgun. Then pulling out the other and saying this one isn't registered. So even if they found your body they would never trace it back to me.
Then give them a bullet. Say if you think you can run faster than this bullet you go ahead and tr something.