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Being i am on my 2nd marriage which has lasted 3 times longer then the 1st. She is my best friend. We cater to each other and put each other 1st before anything or anyone. Besides she has told me on more then one occasion she will never be divorced but she certainly will be widowed.
 
Times have been tough lately on my homefront, so I have been devoting some time to reset the foundation for love. Through my research i have found out about "IMAGO Relationship Therapy", has anyone heard of this type of therapy or had any experience. The Dr. who created the program has a book out by the name of "Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples" which is the basis of this therapy. I inted on going to Powells tomorrow and picking it up to give us more resources to work through these trying times. This past week has been a true test of my resolve, and I feel so far I am putting my best foot forward but want to give myself all the ammunition to succeed. If anyone has any advice, words of encouagement, or know of any great realtionship therapist in Portland please let me know.

-LazerBlazeR

5 Love Languages is a pretty good book for any couples. New, old, good and bad relationships. You and her read through it and work on some of the recommended assignments. Helped our relationship where we thought we knew everything about each other but opened up any unknowns. Best of luck bro, relationships are work in progress
 
How does this end up on a firearms forum? Last place to seek advice for a healthy relationship. Talk to some physically present and trusted friends instead of an imaginary community. If this poses a challenge, reconsider a mature relationship.

Why is this such a bad place? Not sure what kind of a human being you are. He is seeking advise from people who he can associate with
 
How does this end up on a firearms forum? Last place to seek advice for a healthy relationship. Talk to some physically present and trusted friends instead of an imaginary community. If this poses a challenge, reconsider a mature relationship.

Sad to say, that's what Off Topic means!
 
Most of you guys kill me with this whole "anti-spouse" situation, I can't fathom not having a companion. Companion being someone you can communicate with in words and them to you, someone to find security in, to be intimate with, to laugh with, cry with, to frolic in the woods with, and most importantly someone to shoot with!

I really appreciate all the responses even the anti ones (they made me laugh a lot), and to all the folks who sent pm's I will be in touch. This community rocks by the way! I would not hesitate to ask any question here even though its a firearms forum, because like me most all of you I care about a whole lot more than guns and have many steps down paths others may be unfamiliar with and vise versa.

-LazerBlazeR
 
Not sure about the previously recommended book but there are several books on the subject of non-violent communication, that have helped me to have an argument with my wife without her or me feeling like we are being jumped. A counselor who can teach it is a great idea too. It helps to get the necessary communication done, rather than avoiding it, which is bad for any relationship. Good luck in your quest. You have courage bringing it up here.
 
I personally love hearing about men ruining their lives over a female. Whether 17 or 70 it seems that most men are just hell bent on doing it.

Was reading about Simon Cowell this morning. Poor bastard. It met him once. Very nice guy actually. Seems to treat everyone around him as an equal believe it or not. But, he just had to screw around with a tired hag and now it is baby time for him.

Time to share that 90 million a year income Simon and wade through all the drama and grief. Here he could have got himself fixed and had the time of his life with a sea of beautiful 20-somethings begging for his attention, but no. Better to have snagged up a tired gold digger who used to screw her high school teacher at age 16. Most men are such morons.
 
Jeez Burt. I think a married relationship enhances my life, and is worth the work to keep it healthy. I'm guessing most of the married men will tell you the same. I don't know if you had a bad experience or what, but you seem to have issues that need to be dealt with. Ease up on the name calling. You are not THAT superior.
 
Ease up on the name calling.

I never name call or do the playground bullying thing on the internet, that is just pathetic.

Saying 'most men are morons' is not name calling. It is making a general statement based on observation, is not racist, or based in hated. Just perceived fact/opinion.

Show me one time on this or any other forum that I resort to direct name calling. That is for the kiddies on the Honda forums.

As far as the other 'superior' comment, NO. I am a person of average intelligence who just happens to be more informed on a lot of issues, more than the average person. Anyone who bothers to lift a finger to think for themselves rather than be told what to think can know the things I know or pass me by for that matter.
 
Best advice anyone ever gave me on relationship- want a better wife? Be a better husband. If the relationship has gone sour, you might have to give a lot to see results. She needs to relearn your love and relearn to trust you before she'll put herself out there for you again.

I don't know what your situation is, or if anyone has done any wrongs, but I think this stuff is pretty universal (in the absence of infidelity- totally different issue, that)
 
I solved a lot of these issues by marrying a European lady. I know that more than likely you are all married to American women, but having done that twice with poor results, I decided to try someone more like myself. This awesome lady has brains, money, entrepenurial drive, humor, self- confidence, personality, and sensuality that I have never found in an American born lady. Not to say those qualities don't exist in American girls, they are merely rare.

Poor Burt seems to have had his chestnuts roasted over the fire and did not recover. I wonder if he has daughters, and does he refer to them in the same manner?

Marriage is a great institution with the right partner. A great marriage is made up of two forgivers. If you are married to someone who (is confident they have) has no faults, then trouble is sure to arise. On the other hand, if you can BOTH recognize and own your problems, it makes for much smoother sailing.
 
Show me one time on this or any other forum that I resort to direct name calling.
No, you never call out an individual, but you do throw the names at anyone who disagrees with you. You have opinions. You may think they are based in fact, but here, there are plenty of lives that are better because of their relationships with other people, especially their married relationships. That is a fact. The men who choose to be in them are not morons, just people who do not see it your way. If you don't see it as name calling, fine. It is disrespectful.
 

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