Kids dont know how to have fun anymore

[sobo]

Both of mine work jobs after school and during the summers between academic years, and not because I or the ex-wife demand it.
My kids work because they know that that's the only way they're going to get any money for stuff that is outside of the realm of life's necessities.
Gas for their cars, "fun" money, $100 sunglasses, $250 Nike athletic shoes, and a new $1,300 iPhone do not fall within that category...

 

[Alexx1401]

I see alot of them, working fast food, stocking grocery store shelves, pumping gas. There are kids that don't work but there's always been kids that don't work.

From what I see its VERY different now. When I was a kid most of us looked for work, pretty much any work, to buy stuff we wanted. Now? There is a reason so many places with these "entry" jobs can not fill them. An AMAZING number of young live at home and seem to have no interest in getting the kind of work that would let them get out on their own.

 

[The B]

im so glad im not terrified about youth, society, or the future. our best days are ahead of us, gents... of this i an certain.

 

[Alexx1401]

Both of mine work jobs after school and during the summers between academic years, and not because I or the ex-wife demand it.
My kids work because they know that that's the only way they're going to get any money for stuff that is outside of the realm of life's necessities.
Gas for their cars, "fun" money, $100 sunglasses, $250 Nike athletic shoes, and a new $1,300 iPhone do not fall within that category...

Sadly too many parents do NOT do it that way and was see the results now.
20+ years ago I was working in a Machine Shop that had too much work. We started pay at twice min wage for people who knew nothing and would work. Getting lunch one night at a burger joint. Told one girl complaining that we were hiring. Min was $5 an hour then. I said we pay $10 to start full benefits. Every kid back there stopped what they were doing to look at me. Manager had a panicked look on his face until I said you have to work 40 hours a week. All of them lowered their heads and went back to burgers and fries. You know every one of them was still living at home and only wanted to work enough to keep Mom and Dad off their butts.

 

[Will_White]

Sadly too many parents do NOT do it that way and was see the results now.
20+ years ago I was working in a Machine Shop that had too much work. We started pay at twice min wage for people who knew nothing and would work. Getting lunch one night at a burger joint. Told one girl complaining that we were hiring. Min was $5 an hour then. I said we pay $10 to start full benefits. Every kid back there stopped what they were doing to look at me. Manager had a panicked look on his face until I said you have to work 40 hours a week. All of them lowered their heads and went back to burgers and fries. You know every one of them was still living at home and only wanted to work enough to keep Mom and Dad off their butts.

So you agree that it was a problem 20 years ago too.

 

[American123]

Oh, I agree totally. There are some very valid reasons to be concerned for young people today, and social media has far-reaching effects, many of them negative.

But that's not what I'm seeing in most of this thread. It's a bunch of people being grumpy about kids not wanting to do what they want to do, or "having fun" in the same way that they did at the same age. And it's coupled with a lot of the usual "kids are just lazy these days" BS that's been parroted for every generation.

What is indisputable however is the science that had shown heavier use of social media by teens to influence teen depression and suicide rates to a severe extent that previously did not exist. You can see the spike in depression and suicide mirrors perfectly the rise in use of social media.

Going outside and playing, getting exercise, doing meaningful activities, don't have that negative affect on the mind.

 

[CLT65]

Oh, I agree totally. There are some very valid reasons to be concerned for young people today, and social media has far-reaching effects, many of them negative.

But that's not what I'm seeing in most of this thread. It's a bunch of people being grumpy about kids not wanting to do what they want to do, or "having fun" in the same way that they did at the same age. And it's coupled with a lot of the usual "kids are just lazy these days" BS that's been parroted for every generation.

I have a 16yo son. Yeah, he tends to be lazy, would sleep til noon if we let him, as well as spend hours online or gaming. He doesn't want to pick up after himself or do any chores.

It gets frustrating, but then I remember I was the same at that age. He's a good kid, very normal for a kid his age. I tell him that too, and I also tell him that it's my job as his dad to help him grow up to be an honest, hard-working man, instead of a lazy teenage boy.

He does like to spend time watching inane videos on YouTube and gaming, but he will do his chores when required and is respectful to his parents. He loves reading and drawing (quite the aspiring artist). He loves animals and the outdoors and going to the range with me every chance he gets. He's not athletic but we do have him in some martial arts. It's not his thing but I think it's good for him. He hasn't shown much interest in chasing girls yet. Personally I think it's best to not be in a hurry for that.

I've been hearing a lot about the epidemic of anxiety and depression among teenagers and young people lately, especially since covid. I think social media and the internet are factors, and my daughter just told me recently that the constant drumbeat of "the world is ending" (global warming) is a big factor.

Every generation has their worries and frustrations. Every older generation thinks the younger generation is lazy and disrespectful, and every young generation thinks the previous generation is stupid and out of touch. All generalizations of course, but it's human nature. Human nature explains a lot of things.

 

[ScottInPDX]

You know every one of them was still living at home and only wanted to work enough to keep Mom and Dad off their butts.

So... you walked into a place where people you don't know (and who don't know you) are already employed, offered them a job, and when you didn't get any takers you just assumed it's because they're all lazy? Without knowing anything about them, their lives, or current working situations?

I would have had the same reaction they did even if I wanted to work in a machine shop.

What is indisputable however is the science that had shown heavier use of social media by teens to influence teen depression and suicide rates to a severe extent that previously did not exist. You can see the spike in depression and suicide mirrors perfectly the rise in use of social media.

Going outside and playing, getting exercise, doing meaningful activities, don't have that negative affect on the mind.

Yep! And we should definitely encourage disengagement from social media and involvement in healthier activities; we're all in agreement on that. But there's a world of difference between "I want to improve the mental and emotional health of young people around me by pushing them toward healthy and enriching hobbies" and "These damn kids are lazy and don't know what fun is!"

Both perspectives may lead to the same conclusion about what needs to be fixed, but will inform totally different strategies about how to do it.

 

[Alexx1401]

So... you walked into a place where people you don't know (and who don't know you) are already employed, offered them a job, and when you didn't get any takers you just assumed it's because they're all lazy? Without knowing anything about them, their lives, or current working situations?

I will try to dumb it down a little. I walked into a place where people are making $5 an hour with no benefits. I told them the place next door is offering twice that pay with full benefits. All of the faces lit up. Me telling them that they had to work 5, 8 hour days sent them all back to doing what they were doing. Simple enough? Maybe someone can explain it to you better?

 

[ScottInPDX]

I will try to dumb it down a little. I walked into a place where people are making $5 an hour with no benefits. I told them the place next door is offering twice that pay with full benefits. All of the faces lit up. Me telling them that they had to work 5, 8 hour days sent them all back to doing what they were doing. Simple enough? Maybe someone can explain it to you better?

Nah, I think I got it. You saw a reaction, made a huge assumption about the reasoning behind it, and are perfectly content living with that assumption.

 

[Flopsweat]

Nah, I think I got it. You saw a reaction, made a huge assumption about the reasoning behind it, and are perfectly content living with that assumption.

Something bunching up on you?

 

[Will_White]

I will try to dumb it down a little. I walked into a place where people are making $5 an hour with no benefits. I told them the place next door is offering twice that pay with full benefits. All of the faces lit up. Me telling them that they had to work 5, 8 hour days sent them all back to doing what they were doing. Simple enough? Maybe someone can explain it to you better

And this was 20 years ago so its not a new problem.

 

[Mikej]

I see alot of them, working fast food, stocking grocery store shelves, pumping gas. There are kids that don't work but there's always been kids that don't work.

You must live in a different world than we do then. Perhaps in the distant past? I know the places we frequent, and the major grocery stores, in a BIG city, kids don't work. And I'm referring to "Kids" as 16-40. And IF they do get a job, showing up for the job is far down on the list of important thing in their lives. I live it every day. Every where I go and ask, it's the same thing. They are short on help, and when they do hire people they are not dependable. You need to quit listening to the "Pervert in Chief's" employment numbers.

 

[Mikej]

Both of mine work jobs after school and during the summers between academic years, and not because I or the ex-wife demand it.
My kids work because they know that that's the only way they're going to get any money for stuff that is outside of the realm of life's necessities.
Gas for their cars, "fun" money, $100 sunglasses, $250 Nike athletic shoes, and a new $1,300 iPhone do not fall within that category...

Good kids man!

It has something to do with being a little more rural maybe? Also, consider how many generations are we into now that are used to a "Card" being loaded up every month for getting stuff free! Without having to "Work" for it? My memory might be a little off? I just quit counting at THREE generations living off the "Magic Plastic". It's probably more than that now.

 

[Will_White]

You must live in a different world than we do then. Perhaps in the distant past? I know the places we frequent, and the major grocery stores, in a BIG city, kids don't work. And I'm referring to "Kids" as 16-40. And IF they do get a job, showing up for the job is far down on the list of important thing in their lives. I live it every day. Every where I go and ask, it's the same thing. They are short on help, and when they do hire people they are not dependable. You need to quit listening to the "Pervert in Chief's" employment numbers.

I don't live in a BIG city, but around here the majority of fast food work is done by HS and college kids, about half the shelf stockers I see either are HS and college kids or started working there in HS, pumping gas has the highest turn over from what I've seen but still a fair amount of younger people.

Where I work it's not the kids that don't show up it's the middle age dudes that don't want to show up to work.

 

[sobo]

Good kids man!

It has something to do with being a little more rural maybe? Also, consider how many generations are we into now that are used to a "Card" being loaded up every month for getting stuff free! Without having to "Work" for it? My memory might be a little off? I just quit counting at THREE generations living off the "Magic Plastic". It's probably more than that now.

My kids live with the ex in Poulsbo, a little town of about 11,000 souls last I checked.
My son lives there only in the summers now, as he goes to University of Tampa. He's in his last year this fall. MBA.
My daughter is a HS senior this fall, then she'll be leaving town for college somewhere, we haven't figured out just where just yet. Likely Rhode Island.

 

[The B]

My kids live with the ex in Poulsbo, a little town of about 11,000 souls last I checked.
My son lives there only in the summers now, as he goes to University of Tampa. He's in his last year this fall. MBA.
My daughter is a HS senior this fall, then she'll be leaving town for college somewhere, we haven't figured out just where just yet. Likely Rhode Island.

i spent a couple weeks on the hook (anchored, for you land lubbers) in liberty bay last summer.. man what a cool place to be "stuck" for a while. literally everything you need right off the docks, one of the best chandleries ive ever dealt with right there on the water, cool bars, beautiful girls, and lots of other salty pirates to hang with

10/10, recommend

 

[Dungannon]

My kids got $0 for doing their chores as it was just part of being a family. We did have family meetings once a year so they could switch the chores around. They're raising their kids the same way. No TV for our kids; and grandkids have no TV either. The older grandkids have phones with limited access and strong passwords set by their parents.

All the same, my kids grumped about the chores, whined about lack of an allowance, and were reminded on a regular basis that I was just getting them prepared for a life on their own. Now they are doing the same with the grandkids, who are responding with the same attitude and whining as their parents at that age. I'm more appalled at the dumbing down of our education system than the internet.

 

[Ferryman]

I keep passing out, apparently they dont want you driving when you do that. So my nephew will be spending 6 weeks with me, he's on chauffeur duty.

All he does is play on his phone.

I offered to teach his 16 year old butt how to shoot, he said no. Reminded him that ive his great grandads 22 sitting in my closet, it's going to be his 18th birthday gift. Getting some range time would be fun. Kiddo didn't even want to look at it....

We can shoot blackpowder? "Nope."

Wanna take out the trail 90? "Nope."

Wanna help rebuild the VW's motor? "Nope."

Find somewhere to fish? "Nope."

Just going to stare at your telephone for 6 weeks? "Can I borrow the car? Some friends are working out at Planet Fitness."

This is being a teen in 2022, I dont like it. I'd have jumped at any of that at his age.

I'm confused. He's 16. How is any of this a choice for him?

 

[Jason999]

I'm confused. He's 16. How is any of this a choice for him?

On Sunday we're going to my brother in laws place in Rochester for a bit of shooting. Mostly 22s but I still haven't shot my LCP.

If he wants to shoot with us that'd be nice, or he can bury his nose in that phone.