Guns and Marriage

[tac]

I met Mrs tac just over 48 years ago at our local archery club. We got married six weeks later and then the Queen sent us to Cyprus to live.

When we got back to UK from our three-year sojourn in Cyprus we both got back into archery and I got back into gun shooting.

She wanted to know why I had joined the local gun club and she hadn't even been asked if she wanted to.

She wanted to, and did, and got her own FAC and handguns, including a very nice Hammerli 208 and Unique DES69. A county-level shot, she was instrumental in showing our base police the way home on many occasions, shooting either a Browning GP35, my 9mmK Walther PP or even a 4" bbl Model 29 [with some very lively 240gr JHPs], and shared all my other handguns with me until the Great Betrayal back in 1997.

After that, with only BP handguns to shoot, she gave up, saying that she did enough cooking at home, without having to do it all over on a gun range.

 

[revjen45]

1) "You use the term "my wife" like its a term for your current wife."
It would be technically correct to call The Beloved "my first wife" since I had never married anyone else.
My "first wife" and I have been married for 50 years, and after that long I still enjoy her company more than that of anybody else.
2) " Unfortunately, in those stressful days, I think we both viewed each other as The Opponent waay too often."
I can't think of too many situations (existential threats excluded)) uglier that being opponents with your spouse. The fact that we always regarded it as us together against anything was what allowed us to prevail over bad situations. I don't think I would have survived the heart attack without her help. Being married to The Right Person is the finest thing there is, and conversely being in a corrosive relationship is one of the worst. I have observed people who live in contentious relationships, and I couldn't stand the constant stress. I really am thankful that we have a calm, loving household.

 

[Jonnyuma]

I can't think of too many situations (existential threats excluded)) uglier that being opponents with your spouse.

Being married to The Right Person is the finest thing there is, and conversely being in a corrosive relationship is one of the worst.

True words.
I'm with a good woman now for about 6 yrs. People don't believe us when we say we've never had a fight. Some call it unhealthy. Some want to know the "secret".

Fact is, there is no "secret". We have had disagreements but we handle them as adults. Sometimes we end up agreeing to disagree but that's not the same as "unresolved". It's not the same because having differing (or even opposing) opinions don't need a "resolution"... if you respect that the other person is an individual then you can let it go. Just be whatever the opposite of "controlling and manipulative" is.

I've always known that but didn't necessarily practice it.

Granted, things are different now vs when I was married. Not having small children in the picture is pretty big, but that doesn't explain everything. My ex still has the same relationship issues (work, family, general victimhood mentality) that she's always had but I'm not available to serve as the blame-dumpster anymore. Oh sure, she still blames me (and her mother, her father, her boss, Debra at the reception desk, the landlord, the stupid check-out clerk, and on and on... ), but it's blessedly not my problem.

It used to be... but now it's not.

 

[EHJ]

It would take too many words to describe us when a simple picture will do...
I'm 6'5" 250 - She's all of 100 lbs and 5 foot tall. Staten Island born and bred.
I lose every fight - so I never start any. (She's a quilter, so I know she has the patience to stab something ten thousand times with a needle without breaking a sweat...)
I'm not a big collector for collectors sake... "They're all investments." "So is jewelry."

We find a balance. Besides - for every weapon we have - she insists on the same amount of expense on its ammo. If not more. Keeper.

 

[revjen45]

"People don't believe us when we say we've never had a fight. Some call it unhealthy. Some want to know the "secret"."
The secret lies in realizing that you never really win an argument with a woman.

That said, not holding on to anger or resentments over things said &/or done. Holding a grudge is #1 for damaging your own soul and the relationship.

A good friend @ the Big B put all his effort into saving for retirement, to the point that he listed "saving money" as a hobby. He turned down the opportunity to dump the Great Pacific Northwest and join a lovely lady in AZ to slog it out to FRA. It didn't help that he harbored deep resentments and anger @ his ex-wife and drank a LOT, smoked A LOT and ate a LOT of cholesterol. On Thanksgiving a couple of years back he died of a heart attack in his driveway.

 

[fmann]

My wife is not pro-gun, but she is also not anti-hobby or self defense (ever since she's known me I've been studying martial arts, boxing, BJJ, etc.). We were both not raised around gun-culture so you can imagine it was a tense conversation when I found out how good I was at shooting and wanted to pursue the hobby/training. But after talking about it once, it's never been an issue.

I agree with everyone that you can't let seeds of resentment or grudges just stay there. They are going to bloom and over time, that tree is just going to get bigger and stronger. Better to talk it out and reach a mutual understanding and see each other's POV (which does not necessarily mean compromise).

 

[SquirrelSlayer]

Guns have never been an issue in any relationship I've had, But... My EX once demanded I sell my Harley, I reminded her that I'd been riding motorcycles longer that I'd been riding HER. I still have two Harleys!!

 

[Grumpa]

If I ever got with a woman that told me I couldn't have guns in the house/on my person/in the car, I'd set her free, immediately.

 

[SquirrelSlayer]

As it should be!

 

[revjen45]

The Harley has been a family member for 30 years, Louise (The Indian) for 44 years.
I got a jewel.

 

[DunRanull]

IMHO The whole question of firearms and a relationship should be addressed long before the marriage. My soon to be Mother-in-Law was just a bit upset when she found out I carried a gun on a daily basis. There was a special place for my sidearm and whenever I arrived at the house, that place was used.

When we got married, I had my sidearm was with me and for my Bride's 21th Birthday I took her in for her CPL. While she doesn't carry very often, she still has that option.

My Bride also knows all about my Collection and how much I paid for what. Secrets in a Marriage is the fastest way of destroying it. IMHO

Letting the wife know exactly what firearms you have is a sure way to lose them in a divorce. What she doesnt know about her atty can't take. Ask me how I know!

 

[KKG]

Letting the wife know exactly what firearms you have is a sure way to lose them in a divorce. What she doesnt know about her atty can't take. Ask me how I know!

When I married it was for Life. We've been hitched e 45+ years.

 

[DunRanull]

When I married it was for Life. We've been hitched e 45+ years.

I married for life also. Apparently she had different ideas..

 

[2ndtimer]

I try to get my wife more interested in guns.
The only gun that she has shown an interest in is my 1973 Walther PPK/s. Maybe I should buy her one.

Well, in that case, how can you pass this up?

Walther PPK/S .22 lr Pistol, Black - 5030300

The PPK/S .22 blends the iconic PPK design with the fun and cost savings of the .22 L.R. The PPK/S .22 is identical to its PPK brother in .380. But you can shoot the .22 rimfire for pennies a shot and

palmettostatearmory.com

 

[DunRanull]

Well, in that case, how can you pass this up?

Walther PPK/S .22 lr Pistol, Black - 5030300

The PPK/S .22 blends the iconic PPK design with the fun and cost savings of the .22 L.R. The PPK/S .22 is identical to its PPK brother in .380. But you can shoot the .22 rimfire for pennies a shot and

palmettostatearmory.com

I liked the Walther PPK/s until I read that it has an alloy slide! Not good... "According to the American Rifleman review, the slide is made of a lightweight zinc alloy." Too bad, Id love to have one of these in .22LR!

 

[cookie]

Mt wife and daughter carry.

 

[Pete F]

Well, in that case, how can you pass this up?

Walther PPK/S .22 lr Pistol, Black - 5030300

The PPK/S .22 blends the iconic PPK design with the fun and cost savings of the .22 L.R. The PPK/S .22 is identical to its PPK brother in .380. But you can shoot the .22 rimfire for pennies a shot and

palmettostatearmory.com

I looked it up and these a German made. I really hate what S&W did the the PPK/s and wouldn't buy one.. I am not sure if the slide is steel or an alloy. I can't seem to find an answer. It would be a fun range gun, or concealed using some of the newly designed .22s that are pretty devastating for a .22.

I was thinking about buying another German PPK/s in stainless since mine is showing signs of wear and a slight brown patina on the beavertail (rust?).

 

[DirectDrive]

Guns and Marriage

Rule #1
Do not make wife angry when wife has gun in hand

 

[KKG]

I looked it up and these a German made. I really hate what S&W did the the PPK/s and wouldn't buy one.. I am not sure if the slide is steel or an alloy. I can't seem to find an answer. It would be a fun range gun, or concealed using some of the newly designed .22s that are pretty devastating for a .22.

I was thinking about buying another German PPK/s in stainless since mine is showing signs of wear and a slight brown patina on the beavertail (rust?).

I have a German made PPKs in .22RF and the Slide is made of Steel. Some years back somebody had a set of "J" Frame Sights installed!!! They're Great even with a Suppressor(Sparrow) installed.

 

[Stomper]

Guns and marriage, guns and marriage.... it's an institute you can't disparage!