Hi, I have been going through this in the last few months so maybe I can give some perspective that folks who have been handling guns for years have forgotten.
Years ago I had a Ruger Mark II 22 (a pretty nice plinker) and a Tarus 92 (a full sized military handgun with external hammer and safeties). I sold these as a condition when I married my Quaker ex-wife.
After going to gun shops to handle guns and reading, I decided to get a .22 that was patterned off of other higher caliber guns. For example a .22 1911 if I wanted to get a .45 1911. Other .22s seem to have very different controls for racking in rounds, safety and general operation. There are a lot of great training .22s and I selected a S&W M&P .22. It pretty much handles and works like the higher caliber M&Ps and has almost no recoil. When shooting, I could focus more on safety and handling. I took me awhile to introduce and practice good handling skills. (I'm still learning on every outing).
Later I went with a friend to the Clackamas County Shooting Center. These guys there are great. Even though I had been handling guns in the stores, there seemed to be a lot of attitude towards a newbie and not a lot of patience. "How can you not know how to de cock a 1911?" The Center has the full spectrum of rental guns and the staff will really work through each one to ensure that you can work the controls. They also keep an eye on you on the line and are quick to point out any infraction. In short, a very good, controlled place to be. After an hour with a 1911, I knew that was not the gun to start with. Way too much involved in decoking the gun. I also like a gun where I can see the hammer and instantly tell its condition without having to squint to see an indicator of some type. The gun I seemed to like the most was my friend's sig 229. I really liked the decoking lever, it had a hammer and the gun just felt very intuitive to operate. Stopped by the store on the way home and bought one that afternoon. I felt like working up to the defensive gun, gave me the knowledge and insight to make the choice that was right for me.
Since then I have been an active learner. I have been going to the range at least once a month, watching a ton of different Youtube videos, reading some books and took a great class at Oregon Fire Arms Academy. As I said, I am learning something new all the time. My future plans are to take a couple more classes, join a club and develop a circle of like minded shooting friends.
I do plan on getting that 1911 and a M&P 40 but I am really glad I cut my teeth on the .22 and the Sig 40. I'll be much more ready to deal with the complexities in operating a 1911 and carrying a hot Glock/M&P.
Hope this experience helps. Cheers