The other day I was a victim of an attempted burglary. While I was at home watching Fox News and enjoying a nice cold chocolate milk I heard a vigorous rattling on my back door. I grabbed the nearest firearm I had available, my Mosin Nagant I had out from watching Enemy at the Gates, my trusty Remington 870, a SW Model 29 and a Ruger LCP as backup. From 50 feet away I see a 7 foot tall Japanese woman in ninja woman trying to open my door. I also see she had a green tiger with her. Now, facing one foe is hard enough, but facing two well trained opponents would be very difficult. But, home turf advantage coupled with a surprise attack should make all the difference. A little about me. I've been to Thunder Ranch (better than Hillshire), MagPul Dynamical Aerial Operations, and regularly places 1st in all local competitions (I have to disguise my name each time per government regs.). So, needless to say, all that training kicked in. I climbed out the second story window, repelled down the side of the house. Using cover, I entered the 22' circle of engagement, bladed at .45 degrees and confronted the ninja. Seeing the glint of Russian made bayonet, I saw the fear in her eyes. Even the tiger peed in my flower beds. I escorted them to the property line 6 miles away and told them never to come back, or else I'd call the cops. Just goes to show, you can never have enough training. Always be alert.