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Dumb enough for a Darwin Award ?

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by U201491, Jan 30, 2014.

  1. U201491

    U201491 Well-Known Member

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    ROBBERY SUSPECT WHO SHOT HIMSELF IN THE TESTICLES BOOKED INTO JAIL (PHOTO)

    News Release from Portland Police Bureau
    Posted on FlashAlert: January 30th, 2014 10:36 AM

    Downloadable file: Joseph_Johnson_40.jpg http://www.flashalertnewswire.net/images/news/2014-01/3056/71146/Joseph_Johnson_40.jpg

    40-year-old Joseph Johnson was booked into the Multnomah County Jail in the afternoon of Wednesday January 29, 2014. Johnson was booked on charges of Robbery in the First Degree, Assault in the Second Degree and Felon in Possession of a Firearm.

    These charges come as a result of a Tuesday evening robbery and shooting at Southwest 10th Avenue and Columbia Street.

    Robbery detectives learned that Johnson and the victim, 32-year-old Jordan Merrell, both lived in the same residential building and knew each other quite well prior to the robbery.

    Detectives learned that Johnson confronted Merrell in the parking lot behind the building and demanded his property, then shot Merrell once in the leg. As Johnson ran from the scene, he shoved the gun into the front of his waistband and shot himself in the testicles.

    Johnson was later located by a Transit Police officer at Southwest 6th Avenue and Mill Street as he was talking to a woman getting into her car. The woman did not know Johnson and he attempted to run from the officer but fell to the ground and officers took him into custody, discovering that he still had possession of the handgun used in the shooting.

    Investigators learned that the handgun in Johnson's possession was stolen in a car prowl in November 2013 in the Rose Quarter.

    Johnson was treated for his injuries and released to be booked into jail. Jordan Merrell remains in the hospital with serious but not life-threatening injuries.

    ###PPB###
     
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  2. deen_ad

    deen_ad Vancouver, WA Well-Known Member

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    Darwin awards are only given to those who die from the "accident".


    Deen
    NRA Life Member, Benefactor Level
    Defender of Freedom Award
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    "A gun is like a parachute. If you need one and don't have it, you'll probably never need one again!"
     
  3. clambo

    clambo Vancouver, Wa. Well-Known Member

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    Its also a requirement that the candidate off himself completely ( injuries dont count ) before he has reproduced. Something tells me this guy has a mess of illegitimate kids somewhere. I know, I know! The rules are too strict.
     
  4. U201491

    U201491 Well-Known Member

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    I think there were a couple given for outright stupid too, but may be wrong.
     
  5. U201491

    U201491 Well-Known Member

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    They need a Dumbwin category.
     
  6. Tangent123123

    Tangent123123 Battle Ground Active Member

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    I thought it had to do with removing oneself from the gene pool? In most cases that means death. But wouldn't shooting yourself in the testicles have pretty much the same affect?
     
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  7. Garg

    Garg east of portland metro Hold my beer..... watch this Bronze Supporter

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    I am going to go along with this, He deserves the award. I sure hope he has taken himself out of the gene pool.
     
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  8. U201491

    U201491 Well-Known Member

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    Sounds like he might have :D
     
  9. Qaolin

    Qaolin 1 A.U. from a G2 near Beaverton Old Army Cook Silver Supporter

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    Here are the rules straight from the source
    Darwin Awards: History and Rules


    So, according to the rules Numbn....err....Nonuts fits the bill for an award nomination.
     
  10. Garg

    Garg east of portland metro Hold my beer..... watch this Bronze Supporter

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    One can hope :winkkiss:
     
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  11. Sgt Nambu

    Sgt Nambu Oregon Bronze Supporter Bronze Supporter

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    That's just Nuts!
     
  12. Swedish K

    Swedish K SW Washington Moderator Staff Member

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    I was going to say - didn't the guy who was out gigging frogs get on the list after using a .22 to replace a fuse for his headlights get on the list after the .22 substitute fuse went off removing his ability to reproduce?
     
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  13. erudne

    erudne The Pie Matrix PPL Say Sleeping W/Your Rifle Is A bad Thing? Bronze Supporter

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    a bank robber did the same by packing a cocked ruger 44 in the ball sack position. he did not survive.
    this was about 1980, in the Hollywood district
     
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  14. Qaolin

    Qaolin 1 A.U. from a G2 near Beaverton Old Army Cook Silver Supporter

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    No, that's NO Nuts :rofl1:
     
  15. Father of four

    Father of four Portland, Oregon Well-Known Member

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    Portland & Multnomah county needs to pass more rules, regulations and ordinances on the law abiding citizens and open carriers. That will help stop these kinds of things from happening, right?

    Do not worry though if you got your CHL. It want effect you.

    Oh BTW, do not worry you criminals, it want effect you either. (Unless you are caught.) We know you will not be following the laws anyways.
     
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  16. jim97701

    jim97701 Bend Well-Known Member

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    Lets just hope that he scrambled his eggs enough to NEVER be able to reproduce, stupid people like that deserve to be steralized for the benefit of all mankind. When its at their own hand its all that much better!.
     
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  17. U201491

    U201491 Well-Known Member

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    Yep he sure did, the hard way.
     
  18. clambo

    clambo Vancouver, Wa. Well-Known Member

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    As I said earlier Id bet money he has fathered at least one or more children by one or more " baby mamas". It seems to be in those same genes that inspire robbery, carjacking, stupid gun handling, etc. Probably shot his nuts off holding the gun sideways.
     
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  19. The Heretic

    The Heretic Oregon Well-Known Member

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    Close enough for an honorable mention - assuming he just took himself out of the gene pool by removing his ability reproduce.

    I am all for criminals carrying their guns this way if this is the most likely result.
     
  20. rufus

    rufus State of Jefferson Well-Known Member

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    The moral of this story is Mexican carry + running = singing soprano in the jailhouse choir.