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And my experience will say, everybody is different. I think the 10mm is extremely manageable, and if you're a person that can handle such a cartridge, it is an excellent compromise.
Learn how to shop for ammo and it doesn't have to be expensive.
Compared to a .44 mag, the 10mm is a powder puff.
You're gonna get opposite opinions from opposite folks. Only you will know if the 10mm cartridge is for you.
I would question anybody's opinion that accuracy with a 10mm will suffer against any other cartridge. I have professed my 10mm in a 1911 was the single most accurate center fire semi auto I've ever shot.
I know you're not close, but if you were, I'd extend the opportunity for you to try and compare any pistol and cartridge combination I own.
Of course it's "manageable." Any average adult male can "manage" it. But you're gaining probably no measurable performance advantage by "managing" it. Conversely, I would estimate that over 95% will shoot worse due to one or more factors:
* Greater recoil and report. It's science. Can't argue with it.
* Less pleasurable to shoot. I'm above average size and strength, not particularly recoil sensitive, and shot a lot of guns (including a dozen guns most gun folks have never fired). I've owned one. I didn't care for it. YMMV.
* Higher cost (double that of 9mm) will mean roughly half as much training, all things equal.
So you're really not "gaining" anything with 10mm over 9 or .40.
Contrast that "manageable" with a pussycat 9mm.
* Cheaper
* More capacity
* Negligible recoil. More fun to shoot.
* All that means better accuracy for overwhelming number of people.
* Very similar performance. Nearly equal with +P ammo.
* Available in every modern gunmaker lineup, unlike 10mm.