Aye Matey's: Talk Like a Pirate Day is Upon Us

[RicInOR]

http://talklikeapirate.com/wordpress/


#TalkLikeAPirateDay - A crash course for pirate talk - Get yer swagger on...

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[Mister Bisley]

A young man is captured by pirates and is persuaded to join the crew rather than walk the plank. After a few weeks at sea the captain speaks to the man and asks him how he is getting on. The man replies that on the whole he is enjoying things - the rum-soaked drinking binges, the plundering, etc - but there was one thing missing.

"What's that?" asks the captain.
"Well, there are no women" replies the man.

"Arrr" says the captain "Follow me!" The man follows the captain to what appears to be a barrel, on top of the barrel stands a coconut with a face drawn on and a few strands of wispy straw for hair. On the barrel is a crude outline of a woman's body and between the legs is a bung hole. "We calls her Carmen," says the captain, "and you may take her as you will". The man explains that he was unlikely to make use of her and goes on his way.

However, as the months go by with no respite, Carmen appears more and more attractive to the young man. Finally he can resist her no longer and the man has his wicked way with Carmen the rum barrel. To his amazement the experience is far more satisfying than he could ever have imagined!

The next day the captain greets him again. "How did you get on with Carmen then, lad?" he asks eagerly. The man replies "Rather better than I thought... actually, it was rather good!"

"Good," says the captain, a great beaming smile splitting his black-bearded face. "It's your turn in the barrel tomorrow!"


ARRRRRRRRR!

 

[teflon6string]

Pirate: "Arrrgh, pour me a drink barkeep!"

Bartender: "Sure thing. But I have to ask, is that a steering wheel on your wiener?"

Pirate" "Aaaaye! And its drivin' me nuts!"

 

[Tarawa86]

Why couldn't the pirate kid get into the movie?

It was rated ARRRRRRRR

 

[Stomper]

Arrrrrhhhh.... the cabin-boy be a nasty little nipper.... he put ground glass inside is a** and circumcised the skipper!

 

[Caveman Jim]

Sorry, in a a Caveman & only know one dialect, UGHHH....

 

[teflon6string]

New smartphone app for pirates. The iPatch.

 

[308]

Who remembers smokin wee....err, sitting around with friends and listening to cheech & chong albums?

http://www.divetalking.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/10312010ReturnFromDive.mp3

 

[Stomper]

Never heard of them......

 

[Koda]

guy walks down the pier and sees a scraggly pirate guy walking up peg leg, hook for a hand and a patch over his eye, a real pirate in today's world a rarity so he cant resist asking...

How did you lose your leg?

Yar Matey, fell overboard and me leg was bit off by a shark. Dont worry, I killed the shark

horrified but still curious he asked how he lost his hand?

Yar Matey, lost me hand to a crocodile. Dont worry I killed the croc and made a boot (shows his crocodile boot on his one leg)

even more horrified by his stories but still curious, how did you lose your eye?

Yar Matey, woke up one fine morning and looked up at a bird and he pooped in me eye.

after an awkward pause the guy said that was gross but wouldn't have put our an eye...

Yar Matey, well I only had me hook for one day....

 

[Rick Shaw]

HAPPY SatARRRRday, me pirates!!

 

[Caveman Jim]

Arghhh, most gun owners at gun shows are so misinformed, Arghhhh....

 

[HuckleberryFun]

Argh! Ye come just now to me cabin door and ye ask me to vote for your bilge sucking ballot measure? Heave ho, ye scurvy dog!
Argh!...see that landlubber run!