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a little surprising

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by markw76, Sep 20, 2008.

  1. markw76

    markw76 Portland/Moscow on the Willamette Member

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    I HAVE DECIDED TO BECOME A WRITE-IN CANDIDATE.

    HERE IS MY PLATFORM:

    (1) 'Press 1 for English' is immediately banned. English is the
    official language; speak it or wait at the border until you can.

    (2) We will immediately go into a two year isolationist posture to
    straighten out the country's attitude. NO imports, no exports.
    We will use the 'Wal-Mart's policy, 'If we ain't got it, you don't need it.'

    (3) When imports are allowed, there will be a 100% import tax on it.

    (4) All retired military personnel will be required to man one of our
    many observation towers on the southern border. (six month tour) They
    will be under strict orders not to fire on SOUTHBOUND aliens.

    (5) Social security will immediately return to its original state. If
    you didn't put nuttin in, you ain't gettin nuttin out. The president
    nor any other politician will not be able to touch it.

    (6) Welfare - Checks will be handed out on Fridays at the end of the
    40 hour school week and the successful completion of urinalysis and a
    passing grade.

    (7) Professional Athletes --Steroids - The FIRST time you check
    positive you're banned for life.

    (8) Crime - We will adopt the Turkish method, the first time you
    steal, you lose your right hand. There is no more life sentences. If
    convicted, you will be put to death by the same method you chose for
    your victim; gun, knife, strangulation, etc.

    (9) One export will be allowed; Wheat, The world needs to eat. A
    bushel of wheat will be the exact price of a barrel of oil.

    (10) All foreign aid using American taxpayer money will immediately
    cease, and the saved money will pay off the national debt and
    ultimately lower taxes. When disasters occur around the world, we'll
    ask the American people if they want to donate to a disaster fund, and
    each citizen can make the decision whether it's a worthy cause.

    (11) The Pledge of Allegiance will be said every day at school and
    every day in Congress.

    (12) The National Anthem will be played at all appropriate ceremonies,
    sporting events, outings, etc.

    Sorry if I stepped on anyone's toes but a vote for me will get you
    better than what you have, and better than what you're gonna get.
    Thanks for listening, and remember to write in my name on the ballot
    in November. God Bless America !!!!!!!!!!!

    Bill Cosby
     
  2. lazyeye

    lazyeye Corvallis, OR Member

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    I don't like 4.
    It would cut me out of the action.
     
  3. friskydingo

    friskydingo Oregon, NorCal, and Panama. Yes. All three New Member

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    wut about the stock market?
     
  4. wichaka

    wichaka Wa State Well-Known Member

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    There's one in every crowd................ :D
     
  5. markw76

    markw76 Portland/Moscow on the Willamette Member

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    I do hope you guys realize that's one of those phony Internet emails...Cosby isn't conservative at all...
     
  6. friskydingo

    friskydingo Oregon, NorCal, and Panama. Yes. All three New Member

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    kinda figured that one out ;)
     
  7. wichaka

    wichaka Wa State Well-Known Member

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    Sooooooooooooo, does that mean we can't write you in?
     
  8. markw76

    markw76 Portland/Moscow on the Willamette Member

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    :club::club::club::club::club: