+1 on the SR9C, true it doesn't have a decocker, but it does have a thumb safety. AND a pop-up 'round in the chamber' indicator on top of the slide (the red thingy in the pic, sorry it's a bit obscured by my 'stache). So I carry it with one in the chamber and the safety on... and of course I practice at the range flipping the safety off and firing. I sold my Kahr CW9 to buy this, I personally prefer the trigger feel and capacity (comes with both 10 and 17(!!) round magazines). It is thinner than an XD (which are still really great guns), and super easy to conceal, even on a 5'7" 140lb dood like me. Here's a pic of how I carry it, you can see the thumb safety on & the round-in-the-chamber indicator.I've kind of been in the market for a compact 9mm too and while it doesn't have a decocker, I've been leaning heavily towards a Ruger SR9c. I keep hearing good things about the compact version and the price is right at about $400.
I think he's talking single stack thin. Take a look at the Kahr PM9..No decocker, but a long smooth triger pull. And at 14oz's dry, you won't know it's there until you need it.