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The 9mm is substantially more powerful, but what I find interesting are the studies that compile data on hundreds of actual shootings. They seem to indicate that in real-world practicality, the .380 is nearly on par with the 9mm in terms of stopping an attack.
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I carry a .380 because it is easy to conceal with the clothes I need to wear. I fretted about that until I was exposed to this (though in my practice I'm doing triple taps just in case): An Alternate Look at Handgun Stopping Power | Buckeye Firearms Association


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EDIT: from the data it appears that the .380 has an advantage for 1-shot stops, and the 9mm an advantage for overall incapacitation. It seems to me that either is a valid choice.
 
Not really my $0.02. But, someone actually made a video on what a WOMAN should NOT get. Agree or disagree..... it's not my call.


Aloha, Mark

PS....and since I was looking....





OMG!!! I'm blown away at the rising tide of women who want to own guns.
 
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I know that felt recoil and snappiness is subjective to the individual but I do not consider my wife's S&W .380 EZ snappy at all and of course has much less felt recoil than my Beretta 92FS 9mm.

I enjoy shooting the .380 when I'm shooting my other guns, even as well, although my wife is a better shot than I am with both the .380 and 9mm. She also likes how easy the S&W .380 EZ is to rack as compared to other .380's she shot as well as my Beretta (she can rack it but has to put some effort into it) and the XD 9mm I had (she couldn't rack that one at all) for awhile.

I agree that it's better to let them figure out what they want though. I bought the S&W .380 EZ for her and the one thing she does not like is the grip safety, which I got so she wouldn't have t deal with a thumb safety. I think a .380 with a hammer and decocker and no other safety may work better for her but next time I'll let her try it first. :)

Mike
Im in total agreement. Having had to just go through this with my mom. She hated the snappiness of her LC9 and could barely pull back the slide. She basically told me she hated it and we needed to find her another pistol. After looking we found a cute little walther ppk380. My mom loves that thing. She can easily rack the slide and its a puzzy cat to shoot, as compared to the little 9mm. Actually one of the main reasons i suggested the 380ACP to my mom was because i had recently shot one of my friends glocks. She uses that as her primary cary piece. The 380's are easy to shoot and that will promote practice. No one is going to practice if they dont enjoy it, or it is painful. Thats just human nature. Last i heard from my mom, she was buying a few more mags on ebay for her ppk and looking forward to the next time she gets to go out and practice with it. That right there was proof enough that atleast 1 woman i know prefers the 380 over the 9.
 
My sister is looking for her first pistol and gal friend of her's has the Glock 42 380. And has told her it's a good SD gun. But I've told her go with the 9. She's shot my M&P FS 9 and she shoots it well. She's never shot a 380 nor have l. Any advice or thoughts y'all can share that I can give my sis. And she does really like my 9.
For a first gun, I highly recommend a S&W 380 EZ . My daughter was intimidated by my full size 9 and Sheild( power and recoil). Bought the 380 EZ for her after reading reviews and talking to owners. It made a world of difference. Even the 9 EZ is easier to fire with less recoil (hammer Fired). Will upgrade her later down the road. The only problem now is 380 ammo 9mm is easier to find
 
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If someone is very recoil averse, a beretta 81 beats a pointy stick and shoots the underestimated 32acp. It is extremely low recoil and can be accurately dumped into a target. 13 rounds of 32acp is easy to keep on target. Also beretta 81s are cheap. Several of my 32s came with warnings to avoid American ammo as it is weaker than European. It was the preferred caliber of 1920s gangsters including Dillinger.

32 is as small as I would personally go. But shot placement is key and it is easy with a .32. My ppk can dump 10 rounds in under 2 seconds. And at 15 yards it will easily land all in a fist sized group. Now... I am not that good a shot compared to some of y'all. Better than some, worse than a lot. But with a nice 32 I do not feel undergunned.
 

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