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Thread: Darwin Hopes He Died A Virgin

  1. #1
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    Default Darwin Hopes He Died A Virgin

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    ecoEnquirer: Baby Seal Man

    Baby Seal Man

    "William Walkman has spent years living with harp seals, protecting them from both animal and human predators.

    (Labrador, Canada) Harp seal activist William Walkman has long been admired for his devotion to the cause of saving baby harp seals from their annual slaughter. For years, Walkman has lived among the seals, befriending them, and caring for the babies while the parents went off in search of food.

    Walkman's story is made even more compelling through the video he has shot of himself interacting with the seals. On one day he is seen beating off a killer whale with a pole as it attempts to catch seals, a staple of the killer whale diet. The next day he is seen trying to feed fish to the baby seals, as adult seals nervously circle him, barking and pounding their tails on the ice in their attempts to protect their babies.

    The camera captures a man obsessed with a mission, yet his motivation seems to be a blurred mixture of altruism and selfishness. His mood varies between elation and despair, and his rants against humanity for its uncaring use of baby seal pelts for fur seem, at times, strangely self-serving.

    The video that Walkman has gathered of the seals presents an unnerving juxtaposition of the baby seals' cuteness with a life that is filled with danger on a daily basis. Sharks, polar bears, and killer whales are always on the hunt for the seals, and Walkman is often seen placing himself in between the hunter and the hunted. He is a self-appointed guardian, risking his life as he interrupts the natural course of nature.

    The recent discovery of Walkman's body by some fishermen, beaten to death in his sleep, was met with widespread suspicion that seal hunters had taken matters into their own hands. But an investigation by Labrador provincial police has now revealed that blood samples taken from the tails of several adult seals match Walkman's blood.

    The tragic death of Walkman is now believed to be the result of an attack by the adult seals, probably in the middle of the night while Walkman was trapped in his sleeping bag. The adult seals instinctive protectiveness over their pups was a force that Mr. Walkman could not overcome. Despite his near-fanatical care for their welfare, the seals role in the natural order of things was not to be interrupted.

    Life for the seals will now go on as it had before, a life filled with danger, whether from sharks, killer whales, and polar bears, or from the men who arrive each year to club the young seals for their fur.

    History will have to judge whether William Walkman was a champion of animal rights, or a lost soul who was just trying to restore some meaning in his lonely, tortured life… or, just maybe, some of both."

  2. #2
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    He should have kept a seal club close by.

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    Perhaps if he was a S.E.A.L., the adults would not have killed him? They are very protective of their own kind.
    Currently accepting donations of guns and ammo. Multiple calibers accepted.

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    Reminds me of that stoner that lived with the grizzlies in Alaska, only to be done in by the same species he devoted himself to for a few years.

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    He ignored reality but could not ignore the consequences of ignoring reality
    Burt Gummer, Kevatc and Nutty4Guns like this.

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    Just out of curiosity, what do hunters use this seal fur for anyway? Is it for local use or what?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ironbar View Post
    Just out of curiosity, what do hunters use this seal fur for anyway? Is it for local use or what?
    Someone correct me if I am wrong but I think they are used for high end furs for humans. I've never understood that particular industry nor the people it seems to supply. You want a harp seal fur then get your rich butt out to the cold and the ice and club a baby seal yourself.

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    Baby harp seal furs are high value...

    Man.. Grizzly Man II. What a freak. I try to have compassion for my fellow man, but this guy was obviously way out in left field.

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    Hilarious! Sounds like a fitting end for that nutjob.

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    I guess his fate was sealed...

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    On one day he is seen beating off a killer whale...
    Anybody catch this part? I think he was way to devoted to protecting them.
    Redcap likes this.

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    Quote Originally Posted by x503Codyx View Post
    "On one day he is seen beating off a killer whale... "

    Anybody catch this part? I think he was way to devoted to protecting them.
    That explains why he was killed by male seals. They got jealous.
    marty8587 likes this.

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    that stoner that lived with the grizzlies in Alaska,
    Yep - Tim Treadwell. A former member of our accounting department is from Alaska and kind of knew him. She said he was a very strange and abnormal person.

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    Quote Originally Posted by RVTECH View Post
    Yep - Tim Treadwell. A former member of our accounting department is from Alaska and kind of knew him. She said he was a very strange and abnormal person.
    Please tell me that a bear ate him...

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    Quote Originally Posted by kenno View Post
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    ecoEnquirer: Baby Seal Man

    Baby Seal Man

    "William Walkman has spent years living with harp seals, protecting them from both animal and human predators.

    (Labrador, Canada) Harp seal activist William Walkman has long been admired for his devotion to the cause of saving baby harp seals from their annual slaughter. For years, Walkman has lived among the seals, befriending them, and caring for the babies while the parents went off in search of food.

    Walkman's story is made even more compelling through the video he has shot of himself interacting with the seals. On one day he is seen beating off a killer whale with a pole as it attempts to catch seals, a staple of the killer whale diet. The next day he is seen trying to feed fish to the baby seals, as adult seals nervously circle him, barking and pounding their tails on the ice in their attempts to protect their babies.

    The camera captures a man obsessed with a mission, yet his motivation seems to be a blurred mixture of altruism and selfishness. His mood varies between elation and despair, and his rants against humanity for its uncaring use of baby seal pelts for fur seem, at times, strangely self-serving.

    The video that Walkman has gathered of the seals presents an unnerving juxtaposition of the baby seals' cuteness with a life that is filled with danger on a daily basis. Sharks, polar bears, and killer whales are always on the hunt for the seals, and Walkman is often seen placing himself in between the hunter and the hunted. He is a self-appointed guardian, risking his life as he interrupts the natural course of nature.

    The recent discovery of Walkman's body by some fishermen, beaten to death in his sleep, was met with widespread suspicion that seal hunters had taken matters into their own hands. But an investigation by Labrador provincial police has now revealed that blood samples taken from the tails of several adult seals match Walkman's blood.

    The tragic death of Walkman is now believed to be the result of an attack by the adult seals, probably in the middle of the night while Walkman was trapped in his sleeping bag. The adult seals instinctive protectiveness over their pups was a force that Mr. Walkman could not overcome. Despite his near-fanatical care for their welfare, the seals role in the natural order of things was not to be interrupted.

    Life for the seals will now go on as it had before, a life filled with danger, whether from sharks, killer whales, and polar bears, or from the men who arrive each year to club the young seals for their fur.

    History will have to judge whether William Walkman was a champion of animal rights, or a lost soul who was just trying to restore some meaning in his lonely, tortured life… or, just maybe, some of both."
    Ya can't fix stupid! Idiot!

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    Sounds like the "Labrador Provincial Police" ranks might include some seal hunters. The finding about "blood" is confusing, and I'm taking this entire report as delivered "tongue in cheek".

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    Default Killing Seals

    OK. So what's the rub? We harvest all kinds of animals for meat, pelts, Horns, antlers, etc.

    The only complaint that I can see here is, do they use the meat? If the meat isn't used,
    then that's "Wastage", a serious violation of game laws.

    Oh, I know.....They'errrr Cuuute......

    Jack...

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    Quote Originally Posted by Redcap View Post
    Please tell me that a bear ate him...
    Sure did! I think they had to retrieve some parts of him from inside some bears!

  19. #19
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    Default Bear ate him

    Sad thing is, his girl friend was in there with him. :-(

    Jack...

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    Quote Originally Posted by x503Codyx View Post
    On one day he is seen beating off a killer whale...
    Anybody catch this part? I think he was way to devoted to protecting them.
    Sounds like he should have been jailed for bestiality - so how many seals were spared by his perversion? Was it a 5 for 1 deal or maybe a seasonal exchange?

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